Make your life visible to everyone

Posts tagged “family

Follow Your Excitement (TO DO LIST)

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Look at your To Do list right now. Does it make you smile?

Or consider an overview of yesterday… does the believed of duplicating it make you shift with anticipation?

If it does not then something is incorrect.

It’s our birthright to be energized. Yet, we waste it to meet up with objectives and proportion with the guarantee of fulfillment later.

We convert the wonderful joy of going our techniques into recurring periods on wet precious metal, pulse rate monitoring devices (ever see children doing that?).

We convert sex into a celebration and make climax our unique concentrate.

We disfigure the joy of perform into a task by consistently following a tedious set of projects.

But instead of asking our strategy completely, we stress ourselves to be more regimented and targeted. We make complex techniques, records and benefits for doing things we never really care about doing. We try to protect aging surfaces with vibrant background. And whenever the deterioration begins to demonstrate beneath, we make an effort to spot it up again.

On some level, we avoid pleasure. We think that art should include battle, success require compromise and objectives take an effort. The compensate comes later.

Sounds like B.S. to me.

My “fitness program” at five was driving a Big Rim, ascending plants and seeing how great I could leap off the shift (the greatest challenge). My strategy at 15 was a mix of baseball after institution, difficult struggling methods (I’ve yet to experience any exercising as strenuous as wrestling), and weightlifting in the gym. I always keep in mind from a very youthful age having a wish to have superhero-like actual capabilities. But it was not until institution that my exercising began to become determined and regimented. And it was around that period that I began to feel verdict and frustration set in.

When I just didn’t raise more weight than the weeks time before or skipped a perform out, the Speech of Judgment would set in. Activity began stopping to be a joy and more of a method for please my ego.

After institution I tried going to health clubs off and on but never found fulfillment in it. I would get energized about being “ripped” at first, then the shine would reduce. An aspect of me that was mixing from hibernation realized that I was trying to compartmentalized health. It sensed icky and inauthentic.

Regaining your joy includes losing the scripts

Now I see movement as not just a method for be powerful — something that has been a wish of my own since I was a hero driven boy — but as a way to communicate joy and creativeness. Jeet Kune Do assisted me regain that. MovNat has as well. Whether it’s going our techniques or going through lifestyle, being in existence in this some time to staying inquisitive keeps our pleasure in existence.

Whenever we become shaped to styles we concrete ourselves in them. We drop our capability to discover, walk and improve.

Curiosity = visibility. It is fresh air to pleasure.

Boredom and difficulty is caused by seeking to keep in mind programs and act out our life understanding what exactly is coming in each act. Not understanding is frightening. It’s also where chance and improvements lay invisible in mysterious tracks, awaiting us to ignite a fire in our minds and hearts and reveal the mysterious.

Following your pleasure is both about selecting interesting tracks, and the way you display up

Waking up energized is not just about starting on system moving activities (though it goes a long way). It’s about the way you appear. One is external: complicated and spectacular geography. The other an inward self-possession: prepared, existing, visibility.

Be talk about the material of your activities. Then ignore everything and be start to now, allowing the wonderful circulation of lifestyle bring you downstream toward your perspective. Know that as you shift along you may learn that what you believed you desired will modify. The unique location you imagined is simply a route. For your assistance system to perform with accurate it must be constantly changing course.

The alchemy of pleasure is one aspect talk will, and one aspect insecure fluidity.

The objective of following your pleasure is worth determined toward. It’s pleasure now. Not at some point.

Waking up energized is about…

Dying to the past
Admitting what sucks… and having the guts to fall it
Staleness and dullness — it makes the comparison and generate for us to replenish our wonderment
Outsourcing, leaving out and automating what does not inspire us
Childlike curiosity
Standing on the edge
Embracing elegance in the apparently mundane
Eating motivation for breakfast
Freshly produced ideas
Looking at the old with baby eyes
A choice


Self Enhancement Alternatives 5 Actions To Open up Your Innovation

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improvement is an ability that everybody has. Some find out it simpler to communicate their modern part than others but that will not mean you do not have expertise. Just like mowing the lawn, studying how to generate and cutting it requires a bit of your energy and energy and attempt and work out to accomplish your prospective. It just needs a chance to work, work out and perseverance. In this article find out a few guidelines on how you can open up your prospective with these 5 self Enhancement alternatives and carry out your modern part.

1. Don’t pay attention to what others say.

If you have a concept, do not let other individuals feedback damage your concept. If they do not like your concept then they can cope with it. You need to comprehend to do elements for yourself. Do you think that Einstein and other great prodigies went on to pay attention to their buddies about their ideas? I do not think so.

2. Exercise

Exercising calms your system by submitting hormones through your system. During work out many individuals get a hurry of creativeness since they are so comfortable. Try it, run for a kilometer or two and see what happens.

3. Find your own style

Everyone is exclusive and design is also exclusive in individuals too. A poet can be informed from another one just because of the terms he uses or a designer because of the sweep he used. If you can find yourself an exclusive design that performs for you individuals will know what a useful resource you are because no one would have the same ability as you.

4. Don’t cover up yourself behind elegant equipment

Just because you have the most costly advanced devices will not create you the best. Yes it does give you an benefits but it is only a small one. Take this for example, do you think a photographer with the latest photographic camera on the market that really will not comprehend digital cameras at all is really going to create it larger than a photographer who knows how to take images using a non reusable photographic camera. No! The same goes with composing, if you have a costly computer what use is it to you if you can’t create. Ensure that you are excellent with your expertise, just because you have elegant devices will not mean you may be the best!

5. Add some passion

Passion is that extra bit of attempt that will take you to the next level. Those who ability can do an excellent job but someone with interest will give your very best. Do you think that job place will drop into your lap just because you are the most talented? Maybe, but others will be established to get that place and that could create them almost difficult.

These are just 5 of the many elements that can open up your advancement and hopefully you will take these into account to carry out your advancement and let everything grow from there.

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51 Lifetimes Instructions

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  1. Have a company handshake.
  2. Look individuals in the eye.
  3. Sing in the bathtub.
  4. Own an excellent songs.
  5. If in a cope with, hit first and hit challenging.
  6. Keep techniques.
  7. Never quit on anybody. Wonders occur daily.
  8. Always take an outstretched side.
  9. Be courageous. Even if you’re not, say to be. No one can tell the change.
  10. Whistle.
  11. Avoid cynical reviews.
  12. Choose your lifetimes companion properly. From this one choice will come 90 % of all your pleasure or agony.
  13. Make it an addiction to do awesome factors for individuals who will never discover out.
  14. Lend only those guides you never proper want to see again.
  15. Never deny someone of hope; it might be all that they have.
  16. When doing offers with ! kids, let them win.
  17. Give individuals a second opportunity, but not a third.
  18. Be enchanting.
  19. Become the most good and passionate individual you know.
  20. Loosen up. Rest. Except for unusual life-and-death issues, nothing is as essential as it first seems.
  21. Don’t allow the cellphone to get rid of essential periods. It’s there for our advantage, not the caller’s.
  22. Be an excellent loss.
  23. Be an excellent victorious one.
  24. Think twice before burdening a companion with a key.
  25. When someone cuddled you, let them be the first to let go.
  26. Be minimal. A lot was done before you were blessed.
  27. Keep it easy.
  28. Beware of the individual who has nothing to reduce.
  29. Don’t get rid of connects. You’ll be amazed how many periods you have to corner the same stream.
  30. Live your lifestyle so that your epitaph could study, No Regrets
  31. Be strong and courageous. When you look again on lifestyle, you’ll feel disappointed about the
  32. things you didn’t do more than the your you did.
  33. Never spend an opportunity to tell someone you really like them.
  34. Remember no one creates it alone. Have a thankful center and stop wasting time to recognize those who assisted you.
  35. Take cost of your mind-set. Don’t let someone else select it for you.
  36. Visit visitors when they are in hospital; you need only remain a few moments.
  37. Begin each day with some of the songs.
  38. Once in a while, take the picturesque path.
  39. Send a lot of Valentine’s credit cost playing cards. Indication them, ‘Someone who believes you’re wonderful.’
  40. Answer the cellphone with passion and power in your speech.
  41. Keep a observe pad and pad on your bed-side desk. Million-dollar thoughts sometimes reach at 3 a.m.
  42. Show regard for everyone who performs for an existing, regardless of how easy their job.
  43. Send your family blossoms. Think of a purpose later.
  44. Make a person’s day by shelling out the cost for the individual in the car behind you.
  45. Become a person’s idol.
  46. Marry only for really like.
  47. Count your delights.
  48. Compliment the food when you’re a visitor in a person’s house.
  49. Wave at the kids on an excellent bus.
  50. Remember that 80 % of the achievements in any job is according to your capability to cope with individuals.
  51. Don’t anticipate lifestyle to be reasonable.

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Top Ten Self-improvement Objects in the way You Need to Cope With

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Self-improvement may include anything, from providing up cigarette using tobacco to using the addiction of spending budget. However, the self-improvement objectives are not that easy to obtain. Your own thoughts may put a variety of obstructions in your direction. It is a well-known proven reality that an personal making initiatives for self-improvement is often frustrated by his or her own ideas and routines. The first thing should be to observe down these constraints and understand how to cope with them. Here is a conversation on the 10 typical self-improvement obstructions you need to cope with.

Habit of Postponing

The most usual obstacle is the habit to postpone the self-improvement efforts. The efforts for whatever change you wish to bring in your life should begin today itself. Delaying the things may put your interest off and you may never be able to start. For instance, if you wish to leave cigarette smoking, you must start practicing the right techniques like hypnosis from today onwards.

Habit of Acceptance

The efforts towards improvement often take the backseat if you accept that the things are not going to change. Don’t believe that the present circumstances can’t be improved at any cost. Remember that it is you who will evaluate your situation and take the decision to improve or not. Get out of the boundary of accepting the things easily and challenge yourself that you want to bring the change in order to improve your life.

To Do Lists Don’t Work

Many people fail to maintain schedule which is another common hindrance in the direction of self-improvement. This happens because of the general notion that to do lists don’t work at all. The fact is that scheduling and following the schedule religiously is one great step to achieve the improvement goals. In fact, planning a schedule will help you spare quality time for many more things that will make you happy and motivated.

Self-improvement Is Not for Me

People have the tendency to forget one of the most important facts of life that nobody in this world is perfect. You can keep on moving on the path of self-improvement to make your life better and better. Thinking that self-improvement is only for losers is actually depriving you from leading a life better than your present day living. For instance, if you don’t know swimming, just think how learning this exercise can improve your lifestyle.

Keeping It a Secret

It is a typical perception of individuals that it is better to keep the self-improvement initiatives a key from others. Some individuals never like others to know that they are going through weight-loss workouts. This form of considering can deny you from useful reviews that you must obtain from individuals around you. Keep in mind that getting your self-improvement activities evaluated by others will increase your assurance and encourage your further.

Self-improvement if Expensive

Many people never start with self-improvement initiatives, considering that it will include a lot of money. The truth is that you can always search for beneficial options that can help you in enhancing your life without strenuous big money. Even your buddies can help you by indicating some useful ways of self-improvement. You never have to shell out on many guides and programs for the objective of enhancing. Invest some time to discover one or two good guides or video clips that you discover value investing on.

Habit of Binding

People by characteristics are limited to develop within the relaxation areas of their specific societies. However, you can carry enhancement in lifestyle by studying new elements owed to various other societies. The best example would be to understand a new terminology that will add considerably to your understanding. Furthermore, you can increase further by studying a bit of different way of lifestyle.

Boring and Time Consuming

Upgrades in lifestyle may take several days or several weeks to display. This is a reality against what the so-called self-improvement professionals declare to carry up the changes in a couple several days. And, it is a frustrating believed for many individuals. You have to think this way that your lifestyle is going towards enhancement and you have to savor this modification. It is value knowing that this voyage for enhancement will be thoroughly pleasant.

Only Big Changes Lead to Improvement

Big changes do account for larger upgrades, but small changes are similarly significant. Many people immediate their initiatives to obtain big changes only, without acknowledging the value of the small steps. For example, if you start going for a day move daily, it will add to your time and effort of reaching health.

More Thoughts Fewer Efforts

Lastly, it is another element of people instinct that initiatives actually created towards self-improvement does not have behind the ideas of enhancement. In other terms, good considering alone cannot help you obtain the self-improvement advantages. You will have to create initiatives to recognize these ideas.

You will definitely link with many of these self-improvement obstructions. Give your best taken to get rid of these constraints and provides your 100% to increase for better.

Originally Posted by: Self Improvement Bible

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Heart to Heart Conversations

When was the last time you connected with a friend or family member through means of authentic conversation?

I’m not talking about superficial chatter consisting of gossip and politics; I’m talking about genuine heart to heart conversation.

I’m guessing it has been a while.

Think about it. The majority of our conversations are meaningless, adding no value to our daily lives.

We talk about the newest music video, the latest politician to be involved in a scandal, and of course how the world is going to come to an end. But what we fail to do is talk about what really matters, our dreams, our aspirations, and our beliefs.

I’m not suggesting I never partake in lower level conversation. I love hearing about the latest pop diva just as much as you do. Nonetheless, I am greatly concerned at the lack of sincere conversation taking place.

Deep conversations are slowly on the decline. We have instead chosen to find entertainment from other means. As a result our beliefs remain confined to ourselves.

Society has taught us to put up our shields and lay low, to keep our opinions and beliefs to ourselves, but in doing so we are starving our soul.

We need to be heard.

Growing up I was never much of a talker, however as I have matured things have begun to change. I have become enamored with numerous questions about humanity. I might never have all the answers but I’m sure as hell going to try.

What drives people? What do people really believe? Why do people believe what they do?

I have found conversation to be a wonderful place to start in my quest.

There’s something about having deep conversations that satisfies my soul. There’s something about those conversations that go past our outer shields and dive deep into the vulnerable beings we are.

One of the reasons I enjoy heartfelt conversation is that I love immersing myself in different perspectives and beliefs. I love having my beliefs challenged because that causes me to reevaluate what I believe on a regular basis. As a result I regularly can the beliefs that do not resonate with me and am left with only beliefs that truly empower my passion and purpose.

Conversation allows me to know who people really are, instead of the person they pretend to be.

Our society as a whole tends to be very close-minded. Close mindedness is a terrible disease. Deep conversation is the cure. It’s only a matter of time before “deep conversation” begins selling in the pill form. Ask your doctor about it today.

One subject I particularly enjoy discussing is religion. I have been raised Catholic but over the years have developed a more holistic approach to religion. This path is what feels right for me. I look at world religions as a source of personal empowerment. I don’t subscribe to any particular one. From my perspective all religions have many empowering components.

Just the other day my friend Victor and I discussed religion for a solid hour. I have tremendous respect for Victor because although his parents moved back to the states he continues to go church even though he has no one telling him to. Now I’m not suggesting everyone only goes to church because they “have to”, I simply find Victor’s particular situation inspiring. I found our conversation to be immensely rewarding. It’s always interesting to hear someone else’s perspective on how the human race originated. While we didn’t agree on everything, I found many of his beliefs to be somewhat similar to mine. Perhaps it was because I was raised Catholic. Talking with Victor solidified my brotherly bond with him.

Another night I again discussed religion with my friend Sara, who happens to be of the Mormon faith. I again found this conversation to be greatly satisfying for I did not know much about the beliefs of Mormon’s. I have had several deep conversations with Sara each time becoming further immersed in different point of views. Once more, not all of her beliefs particularly resonated with me, as I’m sure not all of mine resonated with her, nonetheless I learned a great deal about her religion and further enhanced my knowledge of religion.

Deep conversation can often be difficult. Sometimes individuals reject true conversation from taking place, by rejecting beliefs that are not congruent with theirs, making it impossible for true conversation to take place. I find it rather difficult to talk to several of my classmates about religion because they refuse to accept any belief other than their own. While I can be somewhat close-minded at times, I take particular pride in looking at life from a variety of angles. I have found conversation to be a wonderful source of lens in which I can view the world. While some people aren’t open-minded this is perfectly valid.

From my personal experience I have found deep conversation to be a wonderful way to connect. It may take a while before you are fully comfortable with being completely open about your own beliefs but once you get over that initial resistance conversation is a extraordinary way to reach your highest potential.

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30 Days + 30 Resolutions to Change Your Life

Change is a given. Your life changes whether you want it or not. But isn’t it better to consciously steer your  life by adopting a positive attitude?

I prepared 30 resolutions you can use to revamp your life in the next 30 days. Read through the list and make a mental note whenever an item rings a bell.

The order you think about or apply the following 30+1 suggestions is not important. Feel free to start from the one that strikes you the most.

Please remember that taking baby steps is important when you want to grow and improve yourself so that you lead a happier life that satisfies you more in every way. Although change doesn’t happen overnight, what really matters is the intent. And of course, your genuine effort. You will start enjoying the results sooner than you think.

It’s a great idea to take a printout of the list and stick it on your cork board or carry it in your wallet. Try to think about one thing on the list every single day. And then start applying it to your life. You can cross out the items on the list in the process. Remember to go back to your master list every now and then – especially whenever you feel you need to realign your life.

30 Days + 30 Resolutions to Change Your Life

Day 1: Be courageous. Take risks. Face your fears and think about the best ways to deal with them.

Day 2: Watch less TV. Read more books. Go out and walk more.

Day 3: Express your emotions. Let them out!

Day 4: Be original. Be unique. Don’t imitate. Find your voice. Don’t settle for mediocrity.

Day 5: Talk less. Listen more.

Day 6: Stop procrastinating. Do it now.

Day 7: Be green. Become greener.

Day 8: Simplify your life. Don’t forget that small is beautiful, and less is more.

Day 9: Declutter your home. Declutter your life. Give away more, keep less.

Day 10: Write. Start a blog. Write a book. Write your memoir.

Day 11: Be more sharing. Be generous. Help those who are less fortunate. Donate.

Day 12: Tell your loved ones that you love them. Say it out loud.

Day 13: Find out what success means for you. Find out what you really want and what will make you truly happy.

Day 14: Specialize. Don’t go wider. Go deeper. Learn one thing to the fullest extent.

Day 15: Forgive and forget. Don’t hold grudges. Focus on the present.

Day 16: Be thankful. Voice your thanks.

Day 17: Love yourself and be proud of who you are.

Day 18: Take better care of your health. Eat healthier. Drink more water. Sleep more.

Day 19: Abandon the victim mentality. Stop complaining. Do something about it.

Day 20: Learn to say no.

Day 21: Be honest. Be open. Be transparent.

Day 22: Spend more time with your loved ones. The value you give to someone is in proportion with the time you allocate to that person.

Day 23: Be flexible. Embrace change. Be open to alternatives.

Day 24: Start learning something new. Do something with your hands.

Day 25: Spend more time on your own.

Day 26: Declutter your relationships. Stay away from emotional vampires.

Day 27: Love without fear.

Day 28: Be fair to yourself and to others. Be gentle and compassionate.

Day 29: Don’t forget that one day, you will leave this world. Don’t fuss over small problems. Trim your ego. Take it easy. Don’t let the illusion overcome you.

Day 30: Be more productive. Use your time better.

And the bonus:
Day 31: Add value to people’s lives. Make a difference. But don’t do it to fulfill your ego.

Congratulations! You rock! Keep up the good work, and never forget to give yourself a tap on the shoulder as often as possible. :)


32 Life Lessons for our Teenage Daughters

There’s something like a line of gold thread running through a man’s words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself.              ~John Gregory Brown

  1. Listen to the sound of your own voice
  2. You won’t always get what you want but never settle for less than you deserve
  3. Two telephone numbers you should keep in your cell phone your fathers cell number and  his work number
  4. Make up your own mind no one should tell you what to be.
  5. Don’t just be different dream BIG and give it 100%.
  6. A man who respects your mind and body is a guy worth dating
  7. Find your life’s passion now find a charity and donate to it
  8. Use a condom. Enough said!
  9. Make positive choices
  10. Turn off the lights and shut off the water when you’re not using either
  11. Be a good listener and pay attention to the details
  12. Ask yourself from time to time what’s your Life plan?
  13. Take the easy way out. Never!
  14. Lend money to no one if they need it give it as a gift.  If you don’t have it to give then you don’t have it.
  15. “Speak the truth, even if your voice shakes”
  16. Being smart and pretty is not enough. Develop your character
  17. Say thank you when someone pays you a compliment.
  18. Less is more
  19. If a guy asks you out on a date he should pick up the bill, if it’s your idea return the favor, if you’re with a gentleman rules not apply
  20. Fall down, cry, make mistakes and when its all over get back up
  21. It’s not your job to change anyone so don’t make it your profession
  22. Believe that all things are possible even when the odds are against you
  23. Peer pressure is adopting values you don’t believe in
  24. You don’t have to be a chef but learn to cook a couple of good meals
  25. Be careful not to fall in love with the idea of love
  26. The grass is not always greener on the other side so focus on making grass greener from where you stand
  27. Friends come and go those who stay remember them
  28. Most people don’t discover what they want until its too late
  29. Let go of trying to be perfect because it’s impossible
  30. Make a decision and follow through
  31. Be honest!  You’re travelling a dangerous road when you start to lie to yourself
  32. If you can’t think go for a walk.

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4 Eating Mistakes That Age You

Eating the wrong foods — or not eating the right foods — can result in symptoms that most people tend to assume are due to aging. Here are four tips they’ve assembled to steer you in the right direction:

Mistake #1: You avoid all animal protein

Vitamin B12, which is essential for energy, is found only in foods that are derived from animals. This nutrient helps regulate your metabolism, and it is an important part of maintaining a healthy brain and nervous system. Fatigue is a classic sign of B12 deficiency

Mistake #2: You’re not getting enough manganese and copper

Manganese and copper prevent joint pain, and are both essential for maintaining joint cartilage and flexibility. In many cases, getting enough of these nutrients reverses joint deterioration and eliminates joint pain.

Mistake #3: You avoid healthy fats

Omega-3 fats are part of your brain’s building blocks. If you’re not getting enough in your diet, the architecture of your brain becomes weak, and brain function, including memory, deteriorates.

Mistake #4: You favor packaged foods over whole

Most processed foods do not have enough potassium, which can result in high blood pressure. Eating better can correct the problem.

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10 Things Your Teenager Won’t Tell You

Wonder what’s bugging your teen? It’s hard to be certain when all your son does is grunt and your daughter won’t stop rolling her eyes. So rather than pressing our own kids to talk—not going to happen!—we asked teenagers from around the country what messages they wish they could share with their moms and dads. Sure, every child is different, but it may do you and your teen some good if you took these truthful kids’ concerns to heart.

1. She needs privacy.

“I hate that my parents don’t give me any personal space,” says Eleanor, 14. “And I hate that they don’t think I need it.” Even if your children share a room, give each child an area that’s off-limits to everyone else in the family (including you), such as a desk or a spare closet. To show that you respect your teen’s privacy, don’t rummage through her personal space unless you have a concrete reason to believe that she’s lying to you or hiding something serious. And remember: “All kids today are doing drugs” isn’t a concrete reason.

2. Sometimes he just needs you to listen. 
“I want to tell my mom and dad everything,” says Keegan, 13, “but I don’t want to listen to them nag.” Understand that sometimes your kids just want a sounding board—they’re not looking for you to solve all their problems. When your son complains that his science teacher is being unfair or his soccer coach has been extra-hard on him, encourage him to talk by asking open-ended questions. (“Well, how does that make you feel?”) Don’t jump in with advice or threaten to intervene.

3. She may be dating—even if you’ve explicitly said she can’t. 
“I didn’t tell my parents about a guy I dated for a year, because they didn’t allow me to have boyfriends,” says Marla, 15. “They knew we hung out, but I’d say, ‘Oh, we’re just friends.’” Try to be relaxed when it comes to dating—even if it’s killing you. Instead of forcing your daughter to sneak around, let her start with group dates, where at least four other kids are with her and her date at all times.

4. He may not be getting great grades on every assignment.
“I don’t tell my parents when I get a bad grade because I don’t want to listen to them tell me how I’ve let them down,” says Sam, 16, who says he occasionally fails a quiz but usually makes up for it with better exam scores. “There are nights I just don’t feel like studying!” Sometimes one bad grade is just that: one bad grade. If your son feels like he can vent to you about bombing a quiz or a book report, you won’t have to wait until the end of a semester to find out he’s struggling in school.

5. She doesn’t want to talk to you about sex. 
“My mom knows I’ve kissed a boy,” says Sonia, 15, “but I don’t want to tell her anything else. It’s my life, not hers.” The good news is, in a 2005 government survey, less than half of high school students (47 percent) said they’d had sex. Still, it’s safest to assume your teen is in that 47 percent and educate her about birth control or preventing STDs. Don’t press her for personal details, but do offer advice; use third-person examples if it helps.

6. He hates when you don’t hold his siblings accountable.
“I hate that my parents don’t care how my youngest brother acts,” says Henry, 13. “When he swears or picks a fight with me or my older brother, they say, ‘He’s 7. He doesn’t know any better.’ But when I was his age I would have been in big trouble for swearing.” While it’s natural to become more lax as you have more children, it’s important to consider each unique situation, not just your children’s ages. Remember, all of your kids will respect you more if they think you’re a fair and reasonable parent.

7. She wishes you’d cut her some slack.
“It makes me sad when my mom screams at me when I’m already down,” says Erin, 17. Even if your daughter seems to screw up every time you turn around, it’s important that she doesn’t feel like you’re constantly coming down on her. When you’re upset, take some deep breaths; a few minutes might give you perspective (is it really worth it to lose your cool over dirty laundry?) and a chance to evaluate your daughter’s mood. Perhaps she’s ignored the laundry because she’s stressed about school or antsy about a boy who hasn’t called her back.

8. He lies to stay out of trouble.
“Sometimes I don’t come home because I’m too drunk to drive,” says Aaron, 19. “If I told my parents that, they’d flip out, so I lie.” While it would be irresponsible to give underage drinking the green light, you don’t want your child to be in an unsafe situation because he’s rushing to be home on time. If your son calls just before curfew and says he needs a ride, save your questions (and lectures) for the morning.

9. She gets frustrated when you use her age to your advantage.
“I can’t stand it when my parents say, ‘You’re 17. Act like a grownup,’ one day, and then turn around and say, ‘You’re not old enough to do that. You’re only 17,’ the next,” says Izzy. “Which is it? Make up your mind!” Since “age-appropriate” is subjective, try to give your child hard-and-fast rules that aren’t dependent on a number. (“Every member of this family attends church on Sunday,” or “Visiting friends at college isn’t allowed until you’re in college yourself.”)

10. He wishes you would trust him. 
“My parents don’t trust that I don’t do drugs,” says Steven, 15. “And I really hate that they believe what other people tell them instead of what I tell them.” Constantly accusing your kids of this or that—especially if your accusations are unfounded—breeds mistrust. Eventually they’ll do something dishonest just because they’re sick of being wrongly accused. Trust your kids until they give you a real reason not to.


20 Tasty Aphrodisiacs To Put Sizzle In Your Sex Life

If you’ve got sex on the brain but your body’s feeling unsexy, put away the blue pill! You don’t need Viagra, you need food. (Just not potato chips.) Sexual health and energy is synonymous with a healthy, energized you. An active lifestyle, balanced diet and self-confidence are the best ways to get the sexual charge you need – but that doesn’t mean there aren’t a few foods out there that can give you that extra…boost you’re looking for.

- Maca

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This Andean root is the first food that comes to mind when I think of sexual health and stamina. Just me? It’s been commonly used in Peru since the times of the Inca to increase strength, energy and libido. Modern foodies consider it a superfood, and with good reason. Maca is excellent for balancing hormones and makes a tasty addition to deserts and smoothies.

- Cacao

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Always a woman’s favorite. Real dark chocolate (we’re not talking See’s Candies here!) with a high cacao content contains natural stimulants and wellbeing chemicals, plus plenty of magnesium which is good for the heart and women’s libido. A healthy heart means better circulation, and that means better sex drive. Melt it, pour it, lick it…

- Chiles

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You can’t travel in Latin American without hearing a hot and spicy joke about the size of a man’s chile. And if you’re a fan of picante foods, you know how they can make you a bit sweaty and excitable. Blame it on the capsaicin, the substance in hot peppers which releases endorphins, stimulates nerve endings and increases heart rate.

- Cardamom

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This deliciously exotic little spice has a reputation in its home country of India for being an aphrodisiac. I just think it’s got a wonderful, sensual taste. But there may be some science behind it too: cardamom is high in cineole, which stimulates the nervous system.

- Ginger

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The spicy taste of hot, fresh ginger tea will heat your body up, make your heart race and increase the heat. What more do you need to get it going?

- Pumpkin Seeds

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High in zinc, which is needed for testosterone production, pumpkin seeds are essential for the libido in both men and women. Toast some up, pop in a movie, oh, forget the movie…

- Oysters

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Cold, slimy: I always wondered why oysters have such a reputation as an aphrodisiac food. Some say it’s the shape, but I say it’s the zinc, baby.

- Hemp

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Whether you prefer the seed, the milk, or the oil, hemp is high in the Essential Fatty Acids needed to help balance hormones for a better libido. Whip up a hemp milk latte and cozy up to your sweetie for some kisses to get things going.

- Almonds

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Best when eaten raw, almonds are high in libido-boosting vitamin E. A very sensible sex-boosting insurance policy. Eat daily.

-Garlic

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This one surprised me, because we all know how unattractive it is to be around someone who reeks of garlic. But take note, allicin improves blood flow to the sexual organs, so just make sure you and your partner have garlic in your meal together and you won’t mind the way the other smells. You have to admit, for garlic, that’s a sexy picture.

- Bananas

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This suggestively shaped fruit regulates blood pressure, and you’d do well to eat one a day, because there’s nothing quite like excessively high blood pressure (also known as hypertension) to cause erectile dysfunction.

- Pomegranate Juice

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A very sensual juice and luscious juice (surely Nigella Lawson would approve), many think that pomegranate’s high antioxidant content keeps free radicals from interfering with circulation. Which would have apositive effect on erectile dysfunction.

- Goji Berries

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These superfood berries are considered a potent sexual tonic in Asia. They improve mood and well being and increase testosterone production. They’re tart, complex and intriguing – fittingly.

- Celery

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Granted, celery is not the sexiest food, but it does contains andresterone, which is the hormone that gives men a subtle smell that drives women wild. I’m talking that t-shirt smell, ladies. (Men: we like this.)

- Ginseng

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This high energy root normalizes hormones levels in both men and women and it’s been used for centuries by the Chinese to increase stamina and desire.

- Ginkgo Biloba

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Sort of a wonder herb touted for many purposes, ginkgo can be used to increase sexual energy and regulate blood circulation.

- Guava

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High in vitamin C, guava is great for the antioxidants. Kiwi and berries are high in vitamin C too, which keeps the sexual glands running smoothly. There’s nothing like sharing a cool fruit salad on a hot summer’s day”¦

- Wild Salmon

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Another great source of Essential Fatty Acids. Try it cold with creme fraiche, crackers, wine and a little hand-feeding.

- Avocado

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Such an amazing food anyway, avocados are high in EFA’s and B-vitamins for hormone balance, and folic acid which is good for the heart and gives you energy.

- Leafy Greens

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Eat your salads, ladies, dark leafy greens help your liver metabolize estrogen, and create a good balance of this hormone essential for healthy female sexuality. Sure, they don’t look sexy, but they’ll make you feel amazing.

Of course, there’s no one food that’s going to magically improve your sex life. The key is to avoid cigarettes and excessive alcohol and maintain a state of general health and wellbeing. You can’t expect to sit on your tuckus all day snacking on potato chips and be an excellent lover!


How To Improve Marriage And Slow Down Life At The Same Time

Cappuccino

Everywhere you look, things are moving at a fast pace. Hurry up is a common phrase. When I want something, I want it right now. “What? You mean I have to wait 45 seconds for the book I just bought to download? Where’d I put the number for my Internet provider, I need a faster connection!”

The speed of life takes its toll on marriage and family as well. If your day is spent racing around from one thing to the next, it’s too easy to continue this pace when you arrive home each day.

If you feel like life is too fast, if there is no more room on the schedule for another thing to do, if the chaos of the world around you has caused you to create a life determined by others rather than yourself, and if you are desperately seeking a way to slow things down in order to breathe – then here’s a few suggestions to try.

  1. Take a walk. Make it a point each day to walk with your spouse and your kids. Spring is here in Texas so the weather gets better each day. Go outside and sit and observe the world around you. Walk and talk with your spouse.
  2. Walk or ride a bike to places you need to go. Some stores may be too far to walk, but not all. I love the times when my wife and kids and I walk or ride up to the grocery store or a restaurant for dinner. Sure it takes longer to get there, that’s the point. Enjoy the journey there together.
  3. Make it a point to eat outside often. There’s something about being in nature that allows you to slow down. Go to the park for a picnic, eat out in the backyard, or on the patio. Get outside.
  4. Find a moment alone each morning. Before you jump into the day, take some time to simply sit quietly. The longer the better. Enjoy a cup of coffee or tea. Breathe in and out, relax, meditate, pray. What better way to start each day?
  5. Don’t check email first thing in the morning. I struggle with this one the most. It’s such a routine to fire up the laptop first thing in the morning and check to see what’s going on with the blog, emails, etc. This allows too many other things to invade my life too soon in the day. Try waiting until 9 or 10 each morning to check email. That way the first part of the day can be spent on whatever is most important.
  6. Turn off all phones. At some point each evening, turn off your phones, or at the very least don’t answer them for a while and spend that time with your spouse and family. Play games, read together, talk.
  7. Color with crayons. This one is great if you have little ones around. There’s something magical about the feeling of coloring with crayons. Let yourself go and color. Don’t simply help your child with their coloring, color for yourself.
  8. Go on a media fast. We’ve been on a news fast for almost a year. Absolutely love it! Most everything reported today is negative, so why get caught up in it each evening? Don’t worry, with Google and Yahoo, you’ll still know the major things happening in the world.

I’m sure there’s more, add your ideas in the comments.


100 Ways to Uncomplicate Your Life

My grandfather used to say that we were born as smart as we’d ever be, and that we became less bright with age. I never understood what he meant, until today.

You see, when we’re born we see the world in an uncomplicated way. We know what we need, and we ask for it. We like nice people, and we don’t like mean people. We sleep when we’re tired, we eat when we’re hungry, and we stop eating when we’re full.

As we grow older, we eat and drink to console ourselves, rather than addressing what’s bothering us. We overwork to avoid close relationships, rather than finding people we can trust to form strong bonds with. We hold grudges, play games, spend more than we make, want things we don’t need, and we get too far away from our basic human needs. In other words, we complicate things.

Today, on what would have been my grandfather’s 88th birthday, I dedicate this list to my Papa. Thank you for everything. I finally get it.

1. Don’t try to read other people’s minds

2. Get up 30 minutes earlier so that you don’t rush/get a ticket while driving too fast/have to explain why you’re late/get fired

3. Get 8 hours of sleep per night so that you think more clearly

4. Stick to your budget

5. Start saving and investing every week, no matter how little you can spare

6. Balance your checkbook

7. Don’t try to be friends with everyone. Cultivate closer relationships with fewer people.

8. Don’t try to do business with everyone. Identify your target client and take very good care of them.

9. Before getting angry, ask yourself if it will really matter in 20 years

10. Focus on being a good person, not on pleasing others

11. Stay home this Saturday, and finish off that nagging chore that you need to finish

12. Kiss and make up

13. Make a weekly menu, and shop for only those items at the market

14. Ask your grandparents the best way to uncomplicate life, and try it for a month

15. Fill up your gas tank when it’s half full

16. Don’t drink alcohol when you’re tired, sad or mad

17. Pay your bills on time

18. Get an annual physical examination

19. Say “I love you” to your significant other and to your children. Studies show that more marriages last, and fewer kids use drugs, when these words are spoken every day.

20. For just one day, imagine everyone’s intentions are good because most people’s are

21. Give away clothes that haven’t been worn in two years

22. Throw out clothes that are in disrepair, and can’t be mended

23. When you have a conflict with someone, talk it out. Don’t let it turn into more than it is.

24. Know what your priorities are in life, and act as if they are your priorities

25. Tell the truth

26. Don’t cheat

27. Don’t steal

28. If you’re holding a ridiculous grudge, let it go

29. Clean your house weekly, so that it doesn’t become too large a chore

30. Do your best at work, or at school

31. Don’t eat when you aren’t humgry

32. Eat when you are hungry

33. Be yourself

34. Say no unapologetically

35. Cook simple meals

36. Don’t try to keep up with the Joneses

37. Pay off your car before buying a new one

38. Organise your desk at the office

39. Change your smoke alarm batteries when the clock springs forward, and when it falls back

40. Organise your important paperwork

41. Take only half the clothes that you planned to take with you on holiday

42. Help your children with their homework every night, and have an open dialogue with their teachers

43. Have white sheets and white towels in children’s rooms, because they’re easily bleached

44. Spend your time with nice people

45. Avoid drama

46. Don’t text or talk on the phone while driving

47. Turn off the television/video games/computer; they’re time consumers

48. Don’t engage in office politics

49. Refuse to gossip, or talk behind other people’s backs

50. Do the dishes right after dinner

51. Never go to sleep angry

52. Ask nicely for what you need and want

53. Walk 10,000 steps per day to help your heart

54. Do 20 push-ups before speaking in anger

55. Leave work at work

56. Don’t befriend anyone that isn’t trustworthy

57. Don’t envy others

58. Have your oil changed

59. Take vitamin C before you catch a cold

60. Don’t work more than 8 hours per day

61. Weed your garden weekly

62. Wash your car weekly

63. Have a spring cleaning month every year, and do one room at a time

64. You don’t need to be best friends with work colleagues, but build respectful partnerships

65. Don’t drink and drive

66. Don’t look for reasons to be angry or sad, look for reasons to be happy. You’ll always be able to find plenty of each.

67. Be friendly with your neighbours

68. Return emails and phone messages promptly

69. Schedule in free time

70. Don’t procrastinate

71. Do what you say you’ll do, when you say you’ll do it

72. Be more flexible when you’re able to be

73. Forgive and forget. End of story.

74. Break the consumerism habit…put a three month moratorium in place on buying anything not deemed a necessity

75. Start your diet on September 1, rather than January 1, so that you won’t also have holiday pounds to lose

76. Take care of any health issues or concerns

77. Have your tires rotated

78. Have your brakes checked

79. Have your eyes checked

80. Don’t let your imagination run away with you

81. Let go of perfection in others

82. Let go of perfection in yourself

83. Don’t try to help those that refuse to help themselves

84. Find a way to reduce your commute to work

85. Have an alloted amount of worry time per day/week, that you strictly abide by

86. Drink more water

87. Eat more salmon

88. Don’t make a mountain out of a molehill

89. Wear your hair in a classic, easy to care for style

90. Finish what you start

91. Wear classic clothes and shoes that never go out of style

92. Create a daily routine

93. Have a 1, 5, 10 and 20 year plan for your financial and life goals

94. Slow down

95. Eat out less often

96. When you ask your husband which outfit looks best, thank him for his answer and wear the one he liked

97. Allow your children to grow up

98. Clean out your garage, and donate anything that hasn’t been used in the past year

99. Stretch every day

100. If a relationship is over, let it go

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