Self Enhancement Alternatives 5 Actions To Open up Your Innovation
improvement is an ability that everybody has. Some find out it simpler to communicate their modern part than others but that will not mean you do not have expertise. Just like mowing the lawn, studying how to generate and cutting it requires a bit of your energy and energy and attempt and work out to accomplish your prospective. It just needs a chance to work, work out and perseverance. In this article find out a few guidelines on how you can open up your prospective with these 5 self Enhancement alternatives and carry out your modern part.
1. Don’t pay attention to what others say.
If you have a concept, do not let other individuals feedback damage your concept. If they do not like your concept then they can cope with it. You need to comprehend to do elements for yourself. Do you think that Einstein and other great prodigies went on to pay attention to their buddies about their ideas? I do not think so.
2. Exercise
Exercising calms your system by submitting hormones through your system. During work out many individuals get a hurry of creativeness since they are so comfortable. Try it, run for a kilometer or two and see what happens.
3. Find your own style
Everyone is exclusive and design is also exclusive in individuals too. A poet can be informed from another one just because of the terms he uses or a designer because of the sweep he used. If you can find yourself an exclusive design that performs for you individuals will know what a useful resource you are because no one would have the same ability as you.
4. Don’t cover up yourself behind elegant equipment
Just because you have the most costly advanced devices will not create you the best. Yes it does give you an benefits but it is only a small one. Take this for example, do you think a photographer with the latest photographic camera on the market that really will not comprehend digital cameras at all is really going to create it larger than a photographer who knows how to take images using a non reusable photographic camera. No! The same goes with composing, if you have a costly computer what use is it to you if you can’t create. Ensure that you are excellent with your expertise, just because you have elegant devices will not mean you may be the best!
5. Add some passion
Passion is that extra bit of attempt that will take you to the next level. Those who ability can do an excellent job but someone with interest will give your very best. Do you think that job place will drop into your lap just because you are the most talented? Maybe, but others will be established to get that place and that could create them almost difficult.
These are just 5 of the many elements that can open up your advancement and hopefully you will take these into account to carry out your advancement and let everything grow from there.
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51 Lifetimes Instructions
- Have a company handshake.
- Look individuals in the eye.
- Sing in the bathtub.
- Own an excellent songs.
- If in a cope with, hit first and hit challenging.
- Keep techniques.
- Never quit on anybody. Wonders occur daily.
- Always take an outstretched side.
- Be courageous. Even if you’re not, say to be. No one can tell the change.
- Whistle.
- Avoid cynical reviews.
- Choose your lifetimes companion properly. From this one choice will come 90 % of all your pleasure or agony.
- Make it an addiction to do awesome factors for individuals who will never discover out.
- Lend only those guides you never proper want to see again.
- Never deny someone of hope; it might be all that they have.
- When doing offers with ! kids, let them win.
- Give individuals a second opportunity, but not a third.
- Be enchanting.
- Become the most good and passionate individual you know.
- Loosen up. Rest. Except for unusual life-and-death issues, nothing is as essential as it first seems.
- Don’t allow the cellphone to get rid of essential periods. It’s there for our advantage, not the caller’s.
- Be an excellent loss.
- Be an excellent victorious one.
- Think twice before burdening a companion with a key.
- When someone cuddled you, let them be the first to let go.
- Be minimal. A lot was done before you were blessed.
- Keep it easy.
- Beware of the individual who has nothing to reduce.
- Don’t get rid of connects. You’ll be amazed how many periods you have to corner the same stream.
- Live your lifestyle so that your epitaph could study, No Regrets
- Be strong and courageous. When you look again on lifestyle, you’ll feel disappointed about the
- things you didn’t do more than the your you did.
- Never spend an opportunity to tell someone you really like them.
- Remember no one creates it alone. Have a thankful center and stop wasting time to recognize those who assisted you.
- Take cost of your mind-set. Don’t let someone else select it for you.
- Visit visitors when they are in hospital; you need only remain a few moments.
- Begin each day with some of the songs.
- Once in a while, take the picturesque path.
- Send a lot of Valentine’s credit cost playing cards. Indication them, ‘Someone who believes you’re wonderful.’
- Answer the cellphone with passion and power in your speech.
- Keep a observe pad and pad on your bed-side desk. Million-dollar thoughts sometimes reach at 3 a.m.
- Show regard for everyone who performs for an existing, regardless of how easy their job.
- Send your family blossoms. Think of a purpose later.
- Make a person’s day by shelling out the cost for the individual in the car behind you.
- Become a person’s idol.
- Marry only for really like.
- Count your delights.
- Compliment the food when you’re a visitor in a person’s house.
- Wave at the kids on an excellent bus.
- Remember that 80 % of the achievements in any job is according to your capability to cope with individuals.
- Don’t anticipate lifestyle to be reasonable.
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Top Ten Self-improvement Objects in the way You Need to Cope With
Self-improvement may include anything, from providing up cigarette using tobacco to using the addiction of spending budget. However, the self-improvement objectives are not that easy to obtain. Your own thoughts may put a variety of obstructions in your direction. It is a well-known proven reality that an personal making initiatives for self-improvement is often frustrated by his or her own ideas and routines. The first thing should be to observe down these constraints and understand how to cope with them. Here is a conversation on the 10 typical self-improvement obstructions you need to cope with.
Habit of Postponing
The most usual obstacle is the habit to postpone the self-improvement efforts. The efforts for whatever change you wish to bring in your life should begin today itself. Delaying the things may put your interest off and you may never be able to start. For instance, if you wish to leave cigarette smoking, you must start practicing the right techniques like hypnosis from today onwards.
Habit of Acceptance
The efforts towards improvement often take the backseat if you accept that the things are not going to change. Don’t believe that the present circumstances can’t be improved at any cost. Remember that it is you who will evaluate your situation and take the decision to improve or not. Get out of the boundary of accepting the things easily and challenge yourself that you want to bring the change in order to improve your life.
To Do Lists Don’t Work
Many people fail to maintain schedule which is another common hindrance in the direction of self-improvement. This happens because of the general notion that to do lists don’t work at all. The fact is that scheduling and following the schedule religiously is one great step to achieve the improvement goals. In fact, planning a schedule will help you spare quality time for many more things that will make you happy and motivated.
Self-improvement Is Not for Me
People have the tendency to forget one of the most important facts of life that nobody in this world is perfect. You can keep on moving on the path of self-improvement to make your life better and better. Thinking that self-improvement is only for losers is actually depriving you from leading a life better than your present day living. For instance, if you don’t know swimming, just think how learning this exercise can improve your lifestyle.
Keeping It a Secret
It is a typical perception of individuals that it is better to keep the self-improvement initiatives a key from others. Some individuals never like others to know that they are going through weight-loss workouts. This form of considering can deny you from useful reviews that you must obtain from individuals around you. Keep in mind that getting your self-improvement activities evaluated by others will increase your assurance and encourage your further.
Self-improvement if Expensive
Many people never start with self-improvement initiatives, considering that it will include a lot of money. The truth is that you can always search for beneficial options that can help you in enhancing your life without strenuous big money. Even your buddies can help you by indicating some useful ways of self-improvement. You never have to shell out on many guides and programs for the objective of enhancing. Invest some time to discover one or two good guides or video clips that you discover value investing on.
Habit of Binding
People by characteristics are limited to develop within the relaxation areas of their specific societies. However, you can carry enhancement in lifestyle by studying new elements owed to various other societies. The best example would be to understand a new terminology that will add considerably to your understanding. Furthermore, you can increase further by studying a bit of different way of lifestyle.
Boring and Time Consuming
Upgrades in lifestyle may take several days or several weeks to display. This is a reality against what the so-called self-improvement professionals declare to carry up the changes in a couple several days. And, it is a frustrating believed for many individuals. You have to think this way that your lifestyle is going towards enhancement and you have to savor this modification. It is value knowing that this voyage for enhancement will be thoroughly pleasant.
Only Big Changes Lead to Improvement
Big changes do account for larger upgrades, but small changes are similarly significant. Many people immediate their initiatives to obtain big changes only, without acknowledging the value of the small steps. For example, if you start going for a day move daily, it will add to your time and effort of reaching health.
More Thoughts Fewer Efforts
Lastly, it is another element of people instinct that initiatives actually created towards self-improvement does not have behind the ideas of enhancement. In other terms, good considering alone cannot help you obtain the self-improvement advantages. You will have to create initiatives to recognize these ideas.
You will definitely link with many of these self-improvement obstructions. Give your best taken to get rid of these constraints and provides your 100% to increase for better.
Originally Posted by: Self Improvement Bible
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Top Ten New Year’s Promises
The close of the season is around the corner. It’s the season where we both look again on the last season’s events and most especially, look forward to what the New Year will bring about.
Oftentimes, as we look again, we usually rue elements we’ve done wrong or forget to do. And to prepare us better for the returning New Year, we make a listing of positive modify in our way of life. It may contain elements we wish to achieve or have, thinking we want to modify or routines and way of life we want to try.
To help you see what more can you do better and modify in your way of life, this is the top ten New Year’s Solution you can utilize in the future New Year.
1. Manage Yourself
Do you often get following time? You have too many actions but too short period.
Sometimes our lack of your energy and effort results from our listlessness to manage it. We usually forget the variety of projects we acknowledge that we get found off protect when elements submitted up.
Start to be structured and begin it with you. It may contain developing a to do listing, having a work schedule but most of all, know how to focus on your actions and obligations based on their significance.
Learning to prepare your actions does not only help you fix the debris of your way of life and operate, but also help you set your main concerns on elements that matter most to you.
2. Be Fit and Healthy
The world is getting much deadly and impure that a lot of not treatable ailments, such as cancer, have been getting away a lot of existence. And as such, the emergency of being healthy and fit is higher.
A lot of studies have stated and shown that there are a lot of methods to remain fit and healthy. As easy as walking, running or simply do some extending training at least thirty (30) mins per day can help you convenience away ailments to remain fit and healthy. Not only lethal ailments will be reduced or removed, but also such as worry, tiredness and all other psychological and actual illness we experience in our day to day actions.
3. Master, Master and Learn
Did you know that actual discovering comes from outside the school? And that actual discovering is beyond the amount and master’s degree we earn understanding.
Real discovering comes from our day to day actions and goes through. As they say, we learn best through action.
Also, realize that discovering can come in different types and many sites, like sessions we study our own actions, for visiting training/seminars, getting innovative sessions on art or music, discovering a new game and a lot more.
4. Invest More Time Developing Relationships
Prestige, energy and success are probably essential in your way of life, but ask yourself, why do you operate tirelessly to achieve those? Who are your inspirations to do so?
Most of us will probably answer our family or community, the individuals we serve and be influenced of. Although this reason is clear, frequently we forget it as we get blinded by the glow of reputation, energy and success that we get too fast paced and neglect the root base of our drive.
Take a chance to slow down and spend time building interactions with others. Keep in thoughts that at the end of it all, it’s not what you have that they will remember; it’s what you have done.
5. Have More Faith
Why do some individuals get fortunate while others don’t?
And why are there so many hard-working men, but yet they have gotten fortunate with their career or life?
People usually neglect the energy of trust and knowing. It may contain your religious techniques of desires or just simply knowing that elements can be carried out. That you are capable of have what you want.
So if you want to get fortunate, operate and believe.
6. Make Self-Meditation a Habit
Have you ever joined a Yoga training class?
If you have joined one or never heard of it, it’s a breathing training for your persona. Yoga training is one way of deep breathing that helps you rest and convenience worry. This is done by relaxing and managing both your persona. And after each time, you will feel tranquil to deal with the debris of way of life.
Self-meditation does the same to your way of life. Making a New Year’s resolution is another form of self-meditation for it makes you look over your previous to provide you experience tomorrows with a much better YOU.
7. Are living Within Your Means
Are you one of those who helplessly delay for their regular income only to be able to touch it for a few mins before they would income it to a cashier to pay a long superb debt?
A lot of individuals in our technology now cannot do without bills and card. It becomes a very essential part of their way of life, that if without it, they could not endure.
And while we possess this gorgeous card, we usually reside beyond our indicates. We usually think that we can have more and more of the material elements that we want with less and less sources to do so. Then period, we are filled with bills.
If you want to make a modify in your regular problems, here are some ideas,
Live within your indicates. If you can not, then, discover a more method for reside more.
8. Avoid Bad Habits
What are the elements you wish you examine do if you do not begin ever?
Is it smoking? Drinking? Girls? Flirting? Disloyalty? Cheating?
You know it’s not doing benefits in your way of life, so what do you have to do?
STOP IT! Simple as that! How? Point out to yourself of the repercussions of carrying on to do so.
9. Be a Advantage to Others
Love individuals and individuals will really like you.
When I say really like, it does not mean light really like, but genuine and truthful care and really like for others.
Remember that way of life alone is not only single and sad, but also, useless.
10. Are living Life To The Fullest
Balanced way of life moves in four aspects: psychological, religious, psychological and actual.
Live in all areas of your way of life, for too much of one thing is always bad.
Don’t delay at the end of the vacation to reside your way of life, instead, remain in the vacation of a successful way of life. That is a way of life resided to its maximum today.
Please take note that this listing is not a procedure, but a pure guide that you can utilize or pay no attention to in your way of life. Our only purpose is to give you an idea of what you can look upon in your way of life that you can think of applying in the returning New Year.
HAPPY & BLESSED NEW YEAR EVERYONE!
Some Short Instructions to Live Life.!
~ Give people more than they expect and do this with joy ~
~ Do not forget your favorite poem ~
~ Do not believe everything you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want ~
~ When you say “I love you”, mean ~
~ When you say “I’m sorry,” look the person in the eye ~
~ Be engaged at least six months before marriage ~
~ Believe in love at first sight ~
~ Never laugh at anyone’s dreams ~
~ Love deeply and passionately. It can also happen, but it is the only way to live life to the fullest ~
~ In disagreements, fight fairly. No insults ~
~ Do not judge people by their relatives. “No kidding” ~
Talk slowly but think quickly ~
~ When someone asks you a question you do not want to answer, smile and ask, “Why do you want to know?” ~
~ Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk ~
~ ~ Call your mother
~ Saying “God bless you” when someone sneezes ~
~ When you lose, do not lose the lesson ~
~ Remember the three R’s: Respect yourself, Respect others and Responsibility for all your actions ~
~ Do not let a little dispute injure a great friendship ~
~ When you realize you made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct ~
~ Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice ~
~ Marry a woman / man you love to talk. As you get older, his ability / her conversation
is as important as everyone else ~
~ Spend some ‘alone time ~
~ Open your arms to change, but do not let your values ~
~ Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer ~
~ Read more books and watch less television ~
~ Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you can enjoy again ~
~ Trust in God but lock your car ~
~ A loving atmosphere in your home is so important. Do everything you can to create a house in a quiet, smooth ~
~ In disagreements with loved ones, given the current situation. Do not wake the past ~
~ ~ Read between the lines
~ Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality ~
~ Be kind to the earth ~
~ Ore. There’s immeasurable power in the ~
~ Never interrupt when you are flattered ~
Mind your own business ~ ~
~ Do not trust a man / woman who does not close his / her eyes when they kiss ~
~ Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before ~
~ If you do a lot of money, put it to use helping others while you are alive. It is the satisfaction the greatest wealth ~
~ Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a stroke of luck ~
~ Learn the rules then break some ~
~ Remember that the best relationship is one where the love between two people is greater than your need for each other ~
~ Judge your success by what you had to give up to obtain ~
~ Remember that your character is your destiny ~
~ Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon
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You Lie More Often Than You Think
“The individual who wants all their applause from outside has their pleasure in another’s preserving.” — Claudius Claudianus
Once, in a marriage training I was offering, I offered a research operate to each individual which essential them to make to lifestyle one complete 7 days with a wish to talk exactly what they were considering and sensation to those with whom they had any get hold of. This provided household, associates and even visitors. What I found was that many persons are considerably pushed in their capability to be genuine and obvious when it comes to saying what they really think to others. They are conflicted between what they really think, and their wish (need) to not chance the disapproval of others.
One fresh individual who came again the next 7 days and discussed how she was really able to recognize her need for endorsement and endorsement from others when she declined a demand from a buddy. She revealed that while, at first, it was unpleasant it was also the most publishing expertise she had ever known. She recognized that she had granted herself to be used hostage in every marriage she ever had been in because she was dependent to the endorsement of others. Buddha shown that connection is at the actual of all enduring. I wonder how many of us allow ourselves to expertise, being used in psychological nipple play (or better said, psychological blackmail) by others, not because of their requirements, but because of our own connection to being beloved and worry of denial or disapproval. Rob Waldo Emerson authored, “The only sin that we never reduce in each other is a distinction in viewpoint.” Bill Penn said it even more succinctly: “There can be no marriage where there is no independence. Friendship likes totally free air, and will not be fenced up in right and small enclosures.”
Are you totally able to have a distinction of viewpoint with others and communicate it without fear? Can you say no without fear? And, as well, do you supply others the same independence to say no to you without submitting them on a shame trip? If the very believed of that kind of expertise can make your pulse battle, perhaps it’s a chance to examine your capability to get to “no” others better.
Where do you start? Have becoming secure in understanding that beyond your egoic self (which grows on endorsement from others) there is within you the use of an unlimited energy performing as your “soul” specialist. While center always functions from unconditional like it never wants endorsement from others. Often periods, saying “no” can be the most caring element you can do for others and yourself. When you do your living from such a place of self-awareness you will know that if you are led to say no to someone there will be no need to you are, supply or warrant your location. Describe to them that you are not rejecting them, only their demand. Know who you are and be totally free.
In all your activities with others, keep in mind that it’s not so much what you say but how you say it. When someone can make a demand of you that does not obtain an real “yes” in your center, merely take in considerably and encourage a mindful knowledge of spirit’s location to be believed within you. Let your phrases be tv through that location and you will discover the energy and acceptance to say “no” in a way that is variety, caring and definitely apparent. Let nothing be partial in your emails currently and recognize how totally free you experience.
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How To Maintain A Relationship
“When it comes to love, do not fall, but go, go with the idea that we must love yourself before loving another. It is imperative that trust before it can absolutely trust another and Most importantly, you must accept your flaws before accepting the shortcomings of another. “
Before digging the ways in which we can overcome, disagreements and fights on the relationship issues, we give more detail what happens when you’re in this state of discomfort. Here are some insights into our discussion, we observed patterns.
- What I want right now?
- Do I want my heart or filtered by my ego?
- Do I want to help me become a better person?
- I want to get that bring happiness and satisfaction for myself and those around me?
- What are the most important aspects in my life? Is that between my values?
What worked for you when dealing with those awkward moments in a relationship? What is your ideal perfect relationship?
Share your thoughts in the comments
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15 Ways To Hack Your Brain For A Better Life
Not everyone is born with a large brain. Not everyone can say things like “Elementary my dear Watson,” with a straight face. But that does not mean you can not get a competitive advantage. I remember that scene in the matrix, where the machines are using humans as disposable batteries AA? Not far from the truth. With more than 100 billion neurons, the brain produces about 100 watts of raw energy. The mind is literally a life. And as your other muscles, the more you use, the more it ages the better it works.
If you are looking for a better understanding of mind, more memory and increase alertness, here are 15 simple ways to give your brain box of six bottles.
1. Exercise: You knew it was good for the muscles, but the brain? Absolutely! Over 20% of the body’s blood and oxygen to the brain directly (without passing GO or pay $ 200). Exercise, especially cardio training, more efficient flow to the brain, keeping it well oiled machine. But if you want something a little ‘zen, try yoga. Yoga as many poses Downward facing Dog, is specifically designed to get the blood to the brain more quickly, putting his head below the heart. But if you’re really in a hurry, something as simple as opening a window and take a breath of fresh air can give your brain the more juice it needs.
2. Moisturize: If you need a little pick-me-up, can not double-espresso habit. Instead of trying to drink two glasses of water. The caffeine in coffee and soft drinks can temporarily make you feel more alert, but eventually it will become even more tired by dehydration of the muscles and constriction of blood vessels. And in large quantities, caffeine can send a rush to the bathroom with a bad case of the trots, as it stimulates the spasmodic contractions of the intestine. Water, by contrast, is a simple way to keep the mind alert and refreshed. And you can not beat the price.
3. Find the third stimulation: A friend of mine used to say “. I do not need caffeine, I Motorhead “And he always had his papers in time. Now, heavy metals can not be your thing, but listening to music can increase your productivity. Like the smell of dinner can bring on feelings of hunger, engaging all five senses to stimulate brain activity. For example, the color pinks a visual aphrodisiac. The excitement will dilate your pupils, increases blood flow, and left the pleasure centers in the brain – which will make you more alert and focused. When decorating your workspace light or to change your font color to something more alive, you can work in boredom and fatigue. Aromatherapy can be extremely effective, because the smell is the strongest sense. Lemon, peppermint and cypress are the flavors of several known to stimulate the brain. Or eat a peppermint candy activate both fragrances and flavors.
Take handwritten notes instead of typing will help you retain information more effectively, the pressure points activated by holding a pen linked to the creative centers of the brain and memory.
4. Happy thoughts: We’ve all seen the thrillers of Hitchcock; a person does something so terrible or completely blocks testimony to their minds. Well, in a much smaller scale, such forgetfulness happens all the time. The brain, especially memory, does not respond well to stress. If you are tense, overworked or unhappy, it is much less likely to withhold information or to remain on alert. Try to remove the stressors in your life and work. Practice relaxation techniques; take a hot bath or massage. Or cook some bacon. Many times I have found that happiness = bacon. Anyway, your body is in tune with their emotions, and it shows much more than you think.
5. Play: No Hide No “search. Studies in patients with dementia have shown that word and puzzle games can improve and even restore cognitive mental. Crosswords, a contest or Sudoku: all these activities, the fun can keep pink brain. And the best part is you do not really need to know. This is an example where victory does not matter because the brain reacts to an attempt to resolve the problem, not the knowledge stored in his head. Probably the best games of the brain are those with the strategic objectives such as chess, Risk and Strategy, the goals are constantly changing, and require more brain activity.
6. Watch TV quality: Would not it be wonderful if it was true. Unfortunately, studies indicate that the person sitting in front of the tube is counterproductive. But if in the form of break-butt in the chair called, choose a game or contest shows like Jeopardy, and try to answer questions. Even if you’ve never heard of The Federalist, the brain is stimulated in the same way as if you were playing Trivial Pursuit with friends.
7. Surfing the Internet: Net-addicts are combining! We have known it all the time, and now we were right. A recent study conducted at the University of California at Los Angeles found by searching the Web has contributed to the centers of the brain that control decision-making and complex reasoning. A simple task like searching the web appears to enhance brain circuitry. Brain scans showed that more of the brains were activated to use the Internet than simply reading a book. Not to mention, there are all kinds of great online puzzle games online and waiting to make you smarter. And here’s Clincher: to surf, the more your brain works.
8. Eating food for thought: do not go together. Deprived of food and literally starve the brain makes you stupid stupid. But if you want to get high mental performance are what you eat, here are some things to remember. Proteins are the most important fuel for the brain. But Atkins is not automatically, causing the brain also needs vitamins and minerals crucial dishes. It is always best to get them from food to pills. Vitamin A, to protect the membranes of brain cells, the B vitamins, essential for neuronal growth and vitality, vitamin C, so important in brain function that the brain is fifteen times higher than in other parts of the brain, vitamin E, prevent and actually reverse the deterioration of the brain, magnesium, to maintain vitality, metabolic activity of neurons, zinc, rids the brain of impurities such as lead, to improve cognitive function, and amino acids necessary for growth and health of neurotransmitters.
9. Fill the fish oil, “Jeeves is a size 14 hat, eats tons of fish, and works in mysterious ways his wonders to perform.” During the creation of his immortal, omniscient valet Jeeves, author of PG Wodehouse gave the character a huge domed skull and a regular diet to stimulate the brains of fish. It was no surprise when scientists showed what we knew all along: that eating fish can make you brainy. In Indeed, it is not fish, but Omega -3 fatty acids eicosapentaenoic acid (EPA) and docosahexaenoic acid (DHA), to go around. These fatty acids maintain the levels of dopamine in the brain increases the high growth of neurons in the frontal cortex of the brain and increases the cerebral circulation. Who is a complicated way of saying that the fatty acids that your brain is operating at full capacity, like a tune-up. But before you stock your pantry with tuna, be sure to eat large quantities of fish that can put you in danger of toxins and mercury poisoning.
So it is best to get EPA and DHA from alternative sources and supplements.
10. Eating weeds: not the kind to hide from their parents, but the medicinal plants. Oriental medicine is kick ass and taking names when the brain is concerned. There are about a dozen “brain boosting” herbal, but the two most important are the Ginkgo Biloba and Ginseng. As a medicinal tonic to go, can not be more powerful than ginkgo, to improve cerebral circulation, which stimulates cognitive abilities monstrously. Ginseng is considered the “Cadillac” of Asian herbs, incredible neurological effects. Once thought to realign the body of “yang energy,” we now know that ginseng helps the brain to adapt to stress by agents of the improved productivity of the adrenal glands. The result is an exhilarating balance, which attains enlightenment and monitoring of the brain, no nervous system, shaken, Guy brightness response of most stimulants.
11. Learning new things: That sounds pretty obvious, right? But it’s not that simple. Very few people find time to master new skills or read a new book that is not for work or class. Learning a foreign language, a new trade or a recipe, or challenge a familiar object with each increase of brain growth by stimulating parts of the brain that may have been stagnant and unused until now. But all this takes time, right? Wrong! Try to spend 15 minutes a day in his new discovery, while all ads on a TV show than an hour, and you will be surprised how much they learn.
12. Do not waste time: if your brain were a computer, how many times a day he would sign flashing hourglass? Albert Einstein, one of the greatest thinkers of the world, gave us the theory of relativity, and very good advice: “Make everything as simple as possible.” You can hardly expect your brain to do its best if it is cluttered with non-essential. The best way to organize your mind is to de-clutter your life. Maximize your time with some personal modifications. Save time in the morning to decide the night before, what clothes you wear. Make and keep a list of daily priorities and long-term, and do not let your attention wander. Try multitasking. If you want to be in the bathroom for a while, bring a book or a piece of work you need to get out (you do not have much else!) If you have a long trip or stuck in traffic, make the most of the time listening to an audio book.
If you have to queue at the bank or in stores, make a few notes you need to revise or flash cards for the new language, you decided to learn. Of course, you can look funny, but you become wiser.
13. Actively to improve your memory: There is a new character, Grey Anatomy, which was great for us his photographic memory, which refers to articles in obscure medical journals of the century, railing outside the periodic table without batting an eyelid. For the actor who plays this character to do so convincingly, I bet you had to find a better way to remember information. There are a lot of tricks and methods to get a nice response, but basically they all boil down to some basic principles.
First of all, you know how you learn. There are three basic learning styles: visual, auditory, movement. You can find out which of you, listen, read and write three sentences what I remember best. Once you know how to learn, optimizes data. If you are a visual, a post-it will be very helpful. If you are hearing, to invest from the recorder.
Secondly, the most effective way to remember the facts were made up of different associations. For example, you might remember the date, your dentist appointment, because that number was a favorite singer of age when he died. Or something more cheerful, but you get the idea. If you’re a visual person, try to form a powerful image or snapshot. For example, if you park your car at the 4b, you may remember, that by taking snap shot four hornets hovering above the roof of the car. Trying to establish the emotional associations. If your wife asks you to choose something in storage, think for a minute as you will be disappointed if you forget it, and probably you.
Third, rinse and repeat. Repetition is a proven method of memorization. Just for fun, pull the old book Sat preparation of high school and see how the vocabulary you still remember. Give your memory a workout by re-learning these forgotten gems.
14. Rest Almost nothing is more crucial for proper brain function and effective sleep. Not everyone needs the same amount of sleep, but it hurts to try to think about when you are tired of the letter. Here are some ways your brain to get the most out of sleep. If it takes much time sleeping, not to fight or give in and take a pill. Instead, ease into sleep while reading a book. But make sure it’s fiction. While you might think that the non-fiction would be more boring, studies show that non-fiction of active reflection on the brain, preventing sleep. If you wake up tired, not because you do not have enough sleep. This could be because your brain is deprived of fasting during sleep. Try to eat a little sugar, 100 calories snack before bedtime. It will not be enough to keep awake, and can keep the head in the morning tired. If, despite your efforts, you do not have enough Z, seriously consider a nap.
National action plans are not childish or European, is a completely natural to cheer up your brain. A series of short naps (20-30 minutes) during the day will not set hours of sleep, but it will extend the fatigue that leaves your mind completely useless and you are unemployed.
15. Sex: women go weak at the knees to the idea of the magnitude of his … brain. That’s right. A lot happens to the body during sex, and much more is going on in your head. His brain, that is. There is no activity that is increasing blood flow to the brain, improving cognitive abilities. Having sex may also produce hormones that significantly improve brain function. An example includes the oxytocin “trust”, a hormone that occurs during sex. This increases your ability to think of creative solutions to a problem of serotonin and dopamine, which increases after sex, creative thinking to help a person calm and logical decision making. And if you have trouble sleeping, give your brain the rest it needs, look no further.
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Makes A Relationship Great
Why are some couples happier than others? What is the “secret” for a great relationship? With certain couples it is clear there is something about the way they interact that makes it obvious they have a unique and genuine connection.
Even if you’re in a good relationship, you can’t help but wonder: What do they know that I don’t? And if you’re single, you might look at these couples and attribute it all to chemistry or destiny. But it turns out that people in great relationships live by a few basic rules and they make these rules a priority in their day-to-day lives together. Consider these habits that can help you create a strong, nurturing relationship.
- Great relationships are based on realistic expectations
- Great relationships take work and thoughtfulness every day
- Great relationships need communication know-how
- Great relationships turn negatives into positives
Great relationships are based on realistic expectations
Forget what you see in the movies or on television. In other words, real relationships aren’t anything like what you see in the movies full of non-stop romance, candlelight dinners and whirlwind trips to exotic locations.
Real relationships take effort, time and commitment. Great relationships just don’t happen because two people love each very much, great relationships happen because not only do two people love each other very much, they also value one another and are willing to make an investment of time into the relationship – day after day.
Couples in healthy and positive relationships have a fundamental understanding of the proper and appropriate expectations for a stable and long-lasting relationship. They understand that not all days will be full or passion and romance. Similarly, they understand that rough spots in a relationship may only be temporary if good communication is present to work through these times.
A good way to look at this is to consider not getting too excited with the very high “highs” or too concerned with the very low “lows.” Both are momentary at best, and will not define the true nature and scope of the relationship over a long period of time. By reframing these extremes, you will be left with the right measure of balance and the right set of expectations to build a quality and sustainable relationship for many years to come.
Great relationships take work and thoughtfulness every day
People who are in successful relationships work on these partnerships regularly. They don’t just set their life on cruise control expecting things to be great all of the time. Ask yourself, “What can I do today to make my partner’s life better?” Little bits of effort every day will accumulate over time and make a big difference.
Think of small, specific ways to make your relationship better whether it’s picking up your loved one’s dry cleaning, telling your partner that you’re proud of him or her, or taking over a task he or she really doesn’t like to do.
You should make an effort every day to deposit at least one act of thoughtfulness into your relationship’s bank account. Your goal, however, should not be to make a huge withdrawal at the end of the week. Your only goal should be to keep giving the things your mate wants – either his or her expressed and unexpressed wants. If there are actions you can take to make your partner’s day more convenient and less stressful, then do them. But, again, don’t do them for what you could gain by providing them.
Great relationships need communication know-how
It may look as if people in great relationships intuitively know what their partners need. But the truth is, no one is a mind-reader so don’t expect your partner to be able to figure out how you’re feeling.
When things aren’t perfectly in sync, couples in this kind of relationship know how to communicate. They know that instead of giving their partner a laundry list of what he or she is doing wrong, they can be specific about what it is that they want. They also make an effort to discover what their partner’s needs are. The best way for most people to do this is talk about it.
Ask your partner what things are really important to him or her. Does he want to know you’re proud of him? Does she need to be able to express her sadness over a family or work-related situation without hearing how she ought to handle it?
Too often we get into the habit of coaching and not listening. The best way to let your partner know you are listening is to ask how she or he “feels” about the situation. Once they begin sharing, your job is simply to shut-up and listen. Offer acknowledgments and affirmations from time-to-time to demonstrate you are engaged with what is being said. Only give your opinion or advice if asked.
Great relationships turn negatives into positives
You may have heard the expression: “When you are given lemons – make lemonade.” Overtime, relationships are handed several lemons. The sources for negative feelings and unbalance are numerous. Some are directly caused between both people because of poor or missing communication. Indirect sources of anxiety in a relationship can be work- related or financially based.
When the interpersonal aspect of the relationship is creating the negativity, consider this simple exercise. First, you and your partner must be open to honest feedback. Next, ask your partner this question: “On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate our relationship (keep in mind the word “relationship” can be substituted for intimacy; support of one another, etc.).
Allow your partner time to reflect and provide an honest reply. If the answer is “Seven,” ask this follow-up question: “What are three things I can do to get our relationship to a ten (if the answer is “six,” you would ask for four things, etc.)? Again, give your partner time to consider their response. It may be hard to listen, because the answers may sound critical and negative. But really, the answers are solutions to turn the negatives into positives.
There is one more critical part of this exercise. After your partner is finished and you have taken in and acknowledged the areas for improvement, ask this question: “What are three (or whatever the number needs to be) things you can do to get our relationship to a ten?”
By asking this follow-up question, it’s putting the relationship back on equal footing and back into the spirit of a true partnership. Except for certain extreme and unfortunate examples, most relationships are successful, or not successful, because of the contributions and efforts of both. Take an honest look at how you are contributing to any negative circumstances, but also be aware it does take two to make it work and to create a more positive and healthy relationship.
When lemons drop from the trees, but you and your partner were expecting apples, begin to make lemonade by creating an action list of what you both can do to get apples next time.
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15 Voiceless Mistakes Peoples Make in Relationships
One of my friends recently asked his girlfriend, “What’s one dumb thing I do in the relationship?” She looked at him in shock, “Where do I begin? If it has to be one, I’d just say you can be a real ****.” “What! How dare you. Now it’s my turn,” he replied. A dam wall of topics the couple needed to talk about freely gushed into the open. An hour later they finished talking.
We make many dumb relationship mistakes, which I have noticed after years of study and observing communication and human behavior, that all cannot be listed here. I use the term “dumb” not to put people down, but only because a lot of people repeat the same blunders. Put an end to these 15 relationship mistakes, in no particular order:
1. Withhold Feelings
Men are more guilty than women in withholding feelings from their partner. If something ticks men off, they may hide their irritation instead of revealing what it is that annoyed them. Women are indirectly guilty of this relationship mistake. While women are more emotional than men, they withhold feelings in the sense that they blame or criticize others to indirectly express their emotions. “I hate you for…!” is not an example of expressing your feelings. An expression of emotion is, “I feel sad about…” “I’m feeling happy you…” “I am angry!”
2. Reject Emotions
We may withhold feelings from someone because we reject our emotions. It is uncomfortable for most people to feel guilt, shame, anger, sadness, and even love so they reject these emotions by thinking positively or generally suppressing them. You feel whatever you do for a reason – accept it. Your relationships deteriorate if you suppress anger, for example, because you will resent and behave bitterly with people.
3. Blame
The failure to healthily express emotion can show itself through blame, a common relationship mistake. Look at an argumentative couple to see each person blaming the other for relationship problems. Neither acknowledges imperfection, preferring to be right. Each person thinks people ought to change instead of taking the responsibility for self-change. Victimization is a relationship mistake unhealthy for either person.
4. Gossip
People gossip about their relationships mainly for self-pity. They seek validation that the other person is to blame for relationship problems. If you have a relationship problem, talk with the person you share the problem with and stop complaining about it to your friends or coworkers. The other person is not the cause of your suffering; you are because of your ignorance to the problem through gossip. If a gossiper just turns the mirror on himself, he would realize the rumors hurt his relationships. A gossiper is no better than the originator of the problem. Neither roles create resolution – both compound it.
5. Interpret Behaviors Negatively
“Give people a margin-for-error because you don’t know every detail.”
A gossiper is one example of a person that blames others and interprets their behaviors in a negative light. Each little behavior signals a conspiracy against the cynic. If you think your husband is having an affair, anything he does will be filtered through that perspective.
Give people a margin-for-error because you don’t know every detail. Each of us hold a piece of truth discoverable through communication. The best way to resolve your worries is to ask the person by showing interest in their life.
6. Show A Lack of Interest
Do you know what happened to your partner today? When was the last time you watched a friend play their weekly sport? When did you last ask what someone did at work? Get curious about people’s lives by asking a lot of questions and displaying attentive body language. Communication often lacks in relationships because neither person takes the initiative to learn about the other person. Interest in people’s lives makes them feel important, builds the relationship, and teaches you a lot of great stuff in the process. Think of something a person important to you enjoys then go do it with them. You may even want to take up a new hobby together like dancing or yoga.
7. Exert Excessive Control
We hate being controlled and told what to do. The worst managers micro-manage, dictating employee behavior. Many angry employees echo similar remarks.
The greatest leaders give team members freedom. The same is true in families and interpersonal relationships. If you order your teenage daughter to not smoke, research shows she is more likely to smoke. One study that looked at how values transmit through families found that children with authoritative parents have different values to them. When the parents are supportive rather than restrictive, the children agree and accept similar values.
8. Try to Change People
Whenever we try to change people, whether it be through manipulation, criticism, orders, threats, or rewards, they take on strange behavior. Do a test in a safe environment. Intentionally tell someone what they are doing is wrong and the person could not change, become suddenly quiet, resent you, gossip about you, or purposefully do what you said not to do. We always try to change people, but rarely succeed.
9. Remain Unchanged
We expect people to change while we remain unchanged. Rigid perspectives on money, family, work, emotion, and the relationship creates severe friction that can destroy a relationship. “If my coworker stopped…then I’d be able to…” “If my son stopped…then I could…” “My partner should…then I’d feel…” I’ll give you an if-statement to remember: if you don’t change, you have no right to expect people to change.
10. Keep One’s Point of View
“It is logically and mathematically irrational to conclude one can be right 95% of the time.”
What is your honest estimate of the percentage you think you are right in an argument? 80? 90? 100%? I estimate most people say 95%. That means a fighting couple’s righteousness totals 190%, a formula for conflict. It is logically and mathematically irrational to conclude one can be right 95% of the time. We are not divine beings knowing of truth.
Each of us possess the truth that we must be flexible enough to explore. The cure to any couple’s problem is held by each person because their point of view is 50% of the relationship.
11. Deny Flaws to Show Perfection
Because we don’t change and like to keep our original point of view, we deny flaws and show perfection. When a mistake arises, we freeze about being found out. A simple sit-down discussion where the two of you each admit three flaws about yourselves helps keep destructive perfection at bay while encouraging growth. You do not fear imperfection when mistakes are encouraged to surface.
12. Absence of Admiration
Relationships are easy to take for granted. We devalue what we have while desiring what is out of our reach. Put some effort into the relationship. You can show people you value the relationship with them through admiration. Give a compliment. Send a gift. Thank someone for a task they did. Phone one person now and thank them for something specific.
13. Be Judgmental
We love to judge people. As described in my Communication Secrets of Powerful People book, there are four judgments: criticism, labeling, diagnosing, and praising. We criticize (“You are no good at helping me”), label (“You are a jerk”), diagnose (“Stop being rude because you don’t get what you want”), and praise (“You are the sweetest person for doing that”). Each judgment has its own problems too deep to described in this article.
14. Send Solutions
It is counterintuitive that solutions kill relationships. After all, don’t solutions cure problems? More often than not in relationships, solutions create problems. We feel inferior being controlled and the problem-solver often overlooks the real issue. Solutions are usually manifestations of other dumb relationship mistakes like blame, gossip, trying to change people, and sticking to one’s point of view.
15. Avoid Concerns
The most frequent dumb mistake people make in a relationship is avoiding their partner’s concerns. Look at any bad relationship and each person will tell you their needs are not being met. They are not being listened to, understood, cared for, loved, whatever. Good communication is the key to overcoming these problems and meeting each other’s needs.
There you have 15 mistakes people frequently make in their relationships. Follow this advice then hopefully the next time you ask someone what one mistake you do in the relationship, no walls break because walls are nonexistent.
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I Believe, And You….?
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I Believe…
That just because two people argue, It doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, It doesn’t mean they do love each other. |
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I Believe…
That we don’t have to change friends if We understand that friends change. |
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I Believe….
That no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you, every once in a while and you must forgive them for that. |
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I Believe…..
That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love. |
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I Believe…
That you can do something in an instant That will give you heartache for life. |
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I Believe….
That it’s taking me a long time To become the person I want to be, and I am still evolving. |
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I Believe…
That you should always leave loved ones with Loving words. It may be the last time you see them. |
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I Believe….
That you can keep going long after you think you can’t. |
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I Believe….
That we are responsible for what We do, no matter how we feel. |
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I Believe…
That either you control your attitude or it controls you. |
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I Believe….
That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences. |
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I Believe….
That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.. |
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I Believe….
That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones to help you get back up. |
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I Believe…
That sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel. |
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I Believe…
That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had And what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated. |
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I Believe…..
That it isn’t always enough, to be forgiven by others. Sometimes, you have to learn to forgive yourself. |
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I Believe…
That no matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn’t stop for your grief. |
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I Believe….
That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but, we are responsible for who we become. |
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I Believe…
That you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever. |
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I Believe….
Two people can look at the exact same Thing and see something totally different. |
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I Believe…
That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don’t even know you. |
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I Believe…
That even when you think you have no more to give, When a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help. |
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I Believe…
That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being. |
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I Believe…
That the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon. |
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I Believe…
That you should fwd this to people that you believe in. I just did. |
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‘The happiest of people don’t necessarily have
the best of everything; They just make the most of everything they have. |
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20 Key Ideas For a Happy Marriage
1. Keep your mind on your main goal, which is to have a happy marriage. Say and do what will enable you and your spouse to have a happy marriage. Avoid the opposite. Everything else is commentary.
2. Keep asking yourselves, What can we do to have a happy, loving atmosphere in our home?
3. Focus on giving, rather than taking. Say and do as many things as possible to meet your spouses needs.
4. Keep doing and saying things that will give your spouse a sense of importance.
5. Frequently ask yourself, What positive things can I say and do to put my (husband or wife) in a positive emotional state?
6. Before speaking, clarify the outcome you want. The meaning of your communication is the response you actually get. If the first thing you say is not achieving your goal, change your approach. Remember that mutual respect and happiness is your real goal. Do not needlessly argue. Silence is often the wisest choice. Constantly be mutually respectful.
7. Show appreciation and gratitude in as many ways as possible. Say something appreciative a few times a day.
8. Be a good listener. Understand your spouse from his or her point of view.
9. Be considerate of the feelings and needs of your spouse. Think of ways that you have lacked consideration and be resolved to increase your level of consideration.
10. Instead of blaming and complaining think of positive ways to motivate your spouse. If your first strategies are not effective, think of creative ways.
11. Give up unrealistic expectations. Do not expect your spouse to be perfect and do not make comparisons.
12. Do not cause pain with words. If your spouse speaks to you in ways that cause you pain, choose outcome wording, Lets speak to each other in ways that are mutually respectful.
13. Be willing to compromise. Be willing to do something you would rather not do in return for similar behavior from your spouse.
14. Write a list of ways that you have benefited from being married to your spouse. Keep adding to the list and reread it frequently.
15. Write a list of your spouses positive patterns and qualities. Keep adding to the list and read it frequently.
16. Keep thinking about what you can do to bring out the best qualities of your spouse. Reinforce those qualities with words and action.
17. Focus on finding solutions to any problems that arise. Be solution oriented. Do not just blame and complain. Do not focus on who is more wrong. For a happy marriage, work together to find mutually acceptable solutions.
18. Remember your finest moments. What did you say and do when you felt best about each other? Increase them.
19. Look for positive activities you can do together.
20. Live in the present. What went wrong in the past is the past. You create the present and future with your thoughts, words, and actions right now. Choose them wisely.
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10 Healthy Ways to Help a Hangover
While it’s not something I’m proud of, I’ve got plenty of hangovers under my belt. See, despite all of my healthy practices—yoga, deep breathing, clean cosmetics, brown rice and kale eating—I’m just not that great at saying no to that third or fourth drink once I get going. Bless those of you who are—and damn those of you who are immune to hangovers altogether! Apparently you exist, and you are lucky. But while I am working on my to-don’t list (new rule: don’t drink before dinner), I’ve also concluded that the only thing worse than a hangover is the guilt and self-loathing that can come with it.
And where does that take most of us? Why, straight to the couch with a big bag of chips, or some other crap we’re craving that can leave us feeling worse than before—as we try desperately to fill that hangover hole in our hearts. This got us thinking: Short of avoiding hangovers altogether (genius!), there has to be a more holistic approach to dealing with them when they happen. So, since we know there are no silver bullets for too much booze anyways, Siobhan and I culled our top ten healthy tips for healing after a night of hard partying.
Got any to add?
Have some miso soup with your eggs. This is totally a thing in Japan. Miso soup replaces a lot of things our bodies need to feel better: water, sodium, and other nutrients depleted by the diuretic effects of the alcohol. Because it’s a fermented food that contains healthy bacteria, miso can also aid with digestion. Too much alcohol is known to disrupt the stomach’s lining and can often result in unpleasant digestive side effects—let’s leave it at that. Oh and the cysteine in eggs breaks down the hangover-causing toxin acetaldehyde, so they really are a good breakfast choice post-boozing (and don’t skip the yellows).
Take a handful of omega 3s—and then repeat. There’s not muchomegas aren’t good for. Take them when you get home; take them when you wake up; take them take them take them. Alcohol causes inflammation (which is at the root of most health problems), and omegas are proven to fight that inflammation a serious way. They will also help combat some of the unpleasant side effects of alcohol on your face, like dry, aggro, blotchy skin. Just trust us on this one.
Drink kombucha tea. Yeah, the weird stuff with the floaties at the bottom that actually can contain a bit of alcohol itself. Maybe it’s a hair-of-the-dog thing, but kombucha absolutely makes us feel better when we have a hangover. Again, it’s fermented, which means it’s really good for your sad little tummy. And if you don’t believe us just ask more seasoned hangover experts like Lindsey Lohan and the ladies at Jezebel.
Have sex or just a good cuddle. We’ve said it lots of times: Physical contact releases oxytocin and other happy-making hormones. And feeling cuddly and warm about the world beats out feeling glum and self-punishing. The trick is you have to do it with someone you like because, most of the time time, sex with someone you don’t like is probably not going to help anything—and definitely not your hangover.
Get some body work. If there’s no one to curl up with at the moment, try a professional. Actually, try a professional anyways. I always forget this one, but a good massage makes a planet of difference. Maybe that’s because massage also releases happy hormones, or that one massage is proven to seriously boost your immune system with more white blood cells.
Try some hydrotherapy. One of my favorite activities—hungover or not—is hitting up a Korean spa here in Los Angeles. While these spas offer great massages and scrubs, I usually just pay the minimum to enjoy their hot and cold tubs, steam rooms, and saunas. The act of going from hot water to cold water, and back again, is so rejuvenating. It increases circulation and toxin elimination—some even believe that immersion in cold water gives a kick to the old immune system, which has some scientific support in human and animal studies (though it definitely needs more research). If you have a bath and a shower at home, you can duplicate the spa experience. A few drops of eucalyptus oil into the cold bath is a nice touch—or make the bath hot and the shower cold. Very important: Because this process will also make you sweat, you must hydrate. Make a little lemon or cucumber water to feel extra spa-y and kind to yourself.
Do some exercise—but just a little bit! The camps are divided on this, but here’s our take: If exercise makes you feel better then you should do it. Again though, hydration is key here, and it is important that you not overdo it. Exercise increases circulation, helps elimination, and releases a cocktail of mood-boosting hormones. The few times I’ve forced myself to do it with a hangover, it’s totally helped. From a psychological point of view, if you’re a bit of a type A, it will also let you feel more OK about taking the rest of the day to chill (which we encourage).
Have a banana/blueberry/kale/lemon smoothie. Antioxidants. Potassium. Natural sugars. Vitamins. Digestive enzymes. These are things that actually really help heal a hangover. Get thee to a green smoothie. It has to be made fresh though, not one of those plastic bottles of green stuff next to juice in the grocery store.
Drink coconut water from a coconut. We all know by now that coconut water is nature’s Gatorade—just way better. According to thisTIME piece, it has the same five electrolytes found in human blood; that sports drink we just mentioned only has two. Pshaw. Also, it’s been used in medical emergencies. I don’t know about you, but I’ve had hangovers that could almost qualify. We advocate getting a real green coconut if you can—many healthfood stores offer them with a straw—because whole foods are always better, right Mr. Pollan?
Enjoy your hangover. Come again? That’s right, you heard me. There are some great reasons to have a hangover: You needed a break anyways. You haven’t taken a sick day in months. You can’t remember the last time you watched daytime television. There’s nothing you have to do that can’t wait until tomorrow. You still haven’t watched Country Strong. Sundays are for rest anyways. Nothing important ever happens on a Tuesday. In other words: Let yourself off the hook. Besides, the only person mad at your hangover is you.
Related articles
- The Hangover (gigglewater411.wordpress.com)
- 10 Unconventional Hangover Cures (businessinsider.com)
10 Surprising Health Benefits of Making Love
Getting sex on is about more than just about pleasure. Good sexual health can perk up your bodily health. It certainly puts you in a optimistic frame of wits. Conserve power, turn off lights and light a candle. Save water, share a shower and soap each other. Go green between the sheets. This is more than a lifehack for mating, more than a justification to have sex.
10. A Lower Blood Pressure Level
A big health benefit of sex is lower blood pressure and overall stress reduction, according to researchers from Scotland who reported their findings in the journal Biological Psychology. They studied 24 women and 22 men who kept records of their sexual activity. Then the researchers subjected them to stressful situations — such as speaking in public and doing verbal arithmetic — and noted their blood pressure response to stress. Those who had intercourse had better responses to stress than those who engaged in other sexual behaviors or abstained. Another study published in the same journal found that frequent intercourse was associated with lower diastolic blood pressure in cohabiting participants. Yet other research found a link between partner hugs and lower blood pressure in women.
9. An Analgesic
Sex releases the fun-time hormone, oxytocin. And as WebMD reports, “as the hormone oxytocin surges, endorphins increase, and pain declines. So if your headache, arthritis pain, or PMS symptoms seem to improve after sex, you can thank those higher oxytocin levels.” Beats taking a double dose of pain relieving analgesic any time.
8. A good Work Out
Thirty minutes of sex burns 85 calories or more. It may not sound like much, but it adds up: 42 half-hour sessions will burn 3,570 calories, more than enough to lose a pound. Doubling up, you could drop that pound in 21 hour-long sessions. “Sex is a great mode of exercise,” says Patti Britton, PhD, a Los Angeles sexologist and president of the American Association of Sexuality Educators and Therapists. It takes work, from both a physical and psychological perspective, to do it well, she says.
7. A Cleansed System
It goes without saying that when we get aroused our blood starts to pump at a quicker rate and, thus, blood flow to our brain increases. Both an increased heart rate and more blood pumping through the brain result in better performance (in and out of the bedroom). What this ultimately means is that the fresh supply of blood pumping through your body provides the organs with a healthy dose of oxygen and rids the body of old and wasteful products. So, another health benefitof sex is a cleansed system. Treat your temple right with the help of a little excitement.
6. Fountain of Youth
Although the orgasm is sometimes referred to as the “little death,” having at least two orgasms a week can increase your life span. Every time you reach orgasm, the hormone DHEA (Dehydroepiandrosterone) increases in response to sexual excitement and ejaculation. DHEA can boost your immune system, repair tissue, improve cognition, keep skin healthy, and even work as an antidepressant. Therefore, a health benefit of sex if you keep the orgasms coming, is potentially a longer life.
5. Healing Wounds & Hearts
Healing can be thought of in many ways. Sometimes a relationship needs to heal. Other times, a person needs to heal. It can be a wound or one suffering from something like diabetes. There have been studies in which evidence suggests that sex heals. Lovemaking can help rejuvenate to the point of cells regenerating and wounds healing faster. Set the stage right for the romp and anything is possible. Oxytocin from the big O, it does a body good.
4. An Anti-depressant
Sex produces phenylethylamine, a love chemical that ups your mood. Also, a study from the StateUniversity of New York shows that women who were directly exposed to semen were less depressed. Though as study lead Gordon Gallup points out, “I want to make it clear that we are not advocating that people abstain from using condoms.” After all, getting an STD or experiencing an unwanted pregnancy is not going to lift up anyone’s mood.
3. Prevents Cancer
Sex can help reduce the risk of breast cancer for women who have never given birth. A study showed that if a female increases the frequency of sex, she decreases the risks of breast cancer. Sex strengthens the pelvic floor muscles that control the flow of urine. Kegel exercises occur naturally during sex, giving women better bladder control. Frequent ejaculations, especially in 20-something men, may reduce the risk of prostate cancer later in life, Australian researchers reported in the British Journal of Urology International. When they followed men diagnosed with prostate cancer and those without, they found no association of prostate cancer with the number of sexual partners as the men reached their 30s, 40s, and 50s. But they found men who had five or more ejaculations weekly while in their 20s reduced their risk of getting prostate cancer later by a third.
2. A Hypnotic
After an orgasm, an intense wave of calm and relaxation overcomes humans (that’s why men usually fall asleep) and it’s a time when people can truly liberate themselves and let go. Plenty of people who enjoy a regular dose of sex convey that they sleep much better during the night and feel alive and refreshed throughout the day. So, one of the health benefits of sex is a better nights sleep, which allows you to handle day-to-day stress much more efficiently and helps fight insomnia.
1. Beneficial to Her
Getting down and dirty with her could help her reproductive health. The more sex she has, the more hormones she will produce that are responsible for increased sexual desire. That’s right, the more sex she has, the more sex she will want to have. More lovemaking can increase her levels of estrogen, which protects against osteoporosis and Alzheimer’s. Sex can also help prevent endometriosis in women. Ladies who have sex at least once a week have more regular menstrual cycles than those who frolic under the sheets less frequently. All this sex helps promote fertility in women by regulating menstrual patterns. Post romp, a female gets a jolt of natural oxytocin which in turn releases endorphins. This natural painkiller can help alleviate arthritis pain or lessen cramps. Plus all the practice is perfect if you want to hear the pitter-patter of little carbon footprints. After you’ve made a baby, horizontal dancing can trigger the onset of labor when she’s at term. Semen in her system may help with a speedy delivery. Yes, sex can maybe even help her to tolerate a natural, drug-free birth.
Related articles
- Sex and Its Benefits (socyberty.com)
- Sex and science: the health benefits of lovemaking (telegraph.co.uk)
Spirituality Needs Love
Love needs another. Love is an open giving and receiving process that gets deeper only by letting go and going deeper. Love is a relationship, and a relationship in it’s highest form of two people losing themselves into each other into an everlasting love that is within each for themselves and the other. Less is unfulfilled love that leaves the being short of the blossoming of divine love, or love beyond that which comes, and goes with ‘conditions’.
Love in any degree or form may be part of keeping a marriage together for a ‘marriage marathon’ achievement of decades of survival. Love does not need closed contracts of agreements to live together ‘til death do we part’. On the other hand, love can flourish under many circumstances that have infinite descriptions. Staying together through thick and thin may likely have nothing to do with anything but a low level love of ‘ego commitment’.
Breaking through love’s socially accepted barriers enters a space of evolving into what could be referred to as a ‘spiritual realm of consciousness’. Love in it’s deepest mutual sense is the catalyst to deeper levels of insight, consciousness, spirituality or whatever identification that comes closest to describing it. Love is far more than a word that gets passed around as if to touch everything with it. Love to the ultimate degree passes through, and is reflected by the mirroring of another simultaneously and unbreakably.
Love is the movement of energy light into your being while awareness is the giving out of love in the reverse. Awareness is also being within yourself in absolute aloneness, and in a sense, a feeling in high consciousness without a relationship but one within. Both love and awareness open the being to a state of higher consciousness. Deep inner awareness facilitates the ability to love another with no limitations as well as love being an opening of awareness. One merges with the other moving one beyond the state of the ‘coma’ of normal humanity.
Love does not possess without diminishing it into a ‘conditional’, low energy love. Love needs freedom or space for each person. Freedom is more valuable than love, but needs to have love filled in the heart to be really free. Love is never a bondage but a necessity on the path of ‘self realization’. Love is not a goal but a journey. The love journey is the goal with the insights it brings to the changes and maturity within. Freedom enriches love and awareness that together bring more of each other.
10 Basic Truths About Keeping Your Relationship Healthy
I think it’s easy to make things more complicated than they need to be. Here are some basic rules of the relationship road that will keep you headed in the right direction.
1. Successful relationships take work. They don’t happen in a vacuum. They occur when the couples in them take the risk of sharing what it is that’s going on in their hearts and heads.
2. You can only change yourself, not your partner. If you love someone and think that after a while he or she will alter behaviors you find uncomfortable, think again. If you want changes, put them on the table, so your partner knows what you need.
3. All arguments stem from our own fear or pain. When upset occurs, check out what’s going on inside you rather than getting angry with your partner. Truth is that we usually aren’t upset for the reasons we think we are.
4. Understand that men and women are very different. We’re not from Mars or Venus; we’re not even in the same solar system. Understanding and celebrating our differences will make living together more peaceful, interesting and fun.
5. Honor each other in some way every day. Every morning, you have the opportunity to make your relationship sweeter and deeper by recommitting to your mate. Feeling respected and cherished by the one you love makes life much nicer.
6. Anger is a waste of time. Anger also is a relationship killer because it makes you self-absorbed and won’t allow you to see the good. If you are annoyed with your mate, give yourself some time to calm down and then gently discuss what’s going on for you.
7. Get regular tune-ups. Go to a couples workshop, talk with a counselor or read a relationship book together at least once a year. Even if you don’t think that you need ideas, and the process alone will strengthen your connection.
8. Find a way to become and stay best friends. For some, this sounds unromantic, but for those who live it, most say it’s the best part of their time together.
9. Be responsible for your own happiness. No other person can make you happy. It’s something that you have to do on your own. If you feel that it’s your partner’s fault, think again, and look within to find out what piece may be missing for you.
10. Give what you want to get. Our needs change with time. If you’d like to feel understood, try being more understanding. If you want to feel more love, try giving more. It’s a simple program that really works.
There are no guarantees, but couples who practice these techniques have longer and stronger relationships than those who are not proactive in their love.
75 Ways to Show Love in Relationships
Image via Wikipedia
If you’re married or in a serious relationship, you’re no stranger to the phrase, “I love you.” You can say those 3 little words to your partner one million times, but we all know that it has to be followed up with action.
Showing love isn’t an exact science. We all speak different love languages, so you may show love in a way that your spouse doesn’t understand (and vice versa). Well, it doesn’t have to remain that way.
Happy couples’ love for each other and dedication to the relationship lead to many adjustments in the way they show love to each other. If what you’re doing isn’t working for your relationship, it may be time to change your approach. Use this list of75 ways to show love as a guide to loving your mate in a way that may save your relationship or just take it to a new level of awesomeness.
1. A kiss on the forehead
2. Uninterrupted quality time
3. A note under the pillow
4. Tell him when he looks masculine, sexy, or hot
5. Turn a regular day into an All-About-You day just for your mate
6. Breakfast served in bed
7. A romantic picnic indoors
8. An unexpected dinner cruise
9. Propose marriage on one knee
10. Don’t complain when he leaves the toilet seat up
11. A rose on the pillow
12. Tell her she’s beautiful
13. Pour on the chivalry (open doors, pull her chair out)
14. A bubble bath with rose petals and her favorite scented candles
15. Verbalize what your relationship means to you
16. Surprise her with her favorite flowers and candy
17. An “I love you because…” list
18. PDA (public displays of affection)
19. Heart shaped pancakes or cookies
20. A walk in the park together
21. Hold your beloved a little tighter and longer than usual
22. Do some of his/her chores
23. A handwritten card sprayed with your scent
24. Spoil each other
25. Renew your marriage vows
26. Be first to say “I’m sorry” after an argument
27. Personalize (i.e. engrave) gifts
28. Place an “I love you” flyer under the car’s windshield wiper
29. Send a surprise gift to his/her workplace
30. Support each other’s dreams
31. Make love slowly, passionately
32. Run his bath water
33. Give your spouse space when needed
34. Buy her feminine hygiene products (before she asks)
35. Bring him a cold beer while he watches football
36. Put a love note in her purse
37. Hold hands
38. Take showers together and wash each other’s back (or whole body)
39. Look deeply into your lover’s eyes
40. Always kiss goodbye and goodnight
41. Boast about your mate and your relationship to mutual friends
42. Arrange for a babysitter so you can have an unexpected date night
43. Say how much you love each other even if you think it’s known
44. Use cute pet names for each other
45. Rub your noses together
46. Remember to say thank you (often)
47. Excuse each other’s mistakes
48. Meditate together
49. Sleep in his t-shirt
50. Wash her hair
51. Step outside of traditional gender roles to help each other (Cook dinner for her; take the trash out for him)
52. Verbally reassure your lover
53. Take photographs as a couple
54. Give up the last piece of food on your plate
55. Write a short fairy tale using you and your mate as the characters (Once upon a time…”)
56. Listen more intently
57. Flirt with each other
58. Sing your significant other a love song
59. Get up early to help him/her get ready for work
60. Say “I adore you”
61. Watch a chic flick with her
62. Kiss your mate somewhere you never thought to kiss before (i.e. elbow, knee, toe)
63. Initiate affection (hugs, kisses, spooning)
64. Take good care of yourself so that you’re at your best for the one you love
65. A handmade gift or card
66. Write a sweet message on a fogged-up mirror so he/she will see it after exiting the shower
67. Cook your significant other’s’ favorite meal
68. Feed each other chocolate covered strawberries
69. Cuddle by the fireplace
70. Laugh and have fun with each other
71. Rub his/her feet
72. Create a scrapbook together
73. Start a hobby together
74. Dance indoors to your favorite song
75. Ask about each other’s day
Healthy relationships survive because both partners keep trying. They know the secret–that love is a verb. Loving your spouse or lover means taking action to help keep love (the feeling) alive and flourishing.
What are some of your favorite ways to show love? What are some ways you’d like your partner to show love? Do you agree that love (the action) is as important as love (the feeling).
Relationship Rules
Human beings crave intimacy, need to love and be loved. Yet people have much trouble doing so.
It’s clear from the many letters I get that lots of folks have no idea what a healthy relationship even looks like. Because I care about these things, and care about the environments children grow in, I’m using this space as an attempt to remedy the problem—again.
From many sources and many experts, I have culled some basic rules of relationships. This is by no means an exhaustive list. But it’s a start. Print them out and pin them up on your refrigerator door. I won’t test you on them—but life will.
- Choose a partner wisely and well. We are attracted to people for all kinds of reasons. They remind us of someone from our past. They shower us with gifts and make us feel important. Evaluate a potential partner as you would a friend; look at their character, personality, values, their generosity of spirit, the relationship between their words and actions, their relationships with others.
- Know your partner’s beliefs about relationships. Different people have different and often conflicting beliefs about relationships. You don’t want to fall in love with someone who expects lots of dishonesty in relationships; they’ll create it where it doesn’t exist.
- Don’t confuse sex with love. Especially in the beginning of a relationship, attraction and pleasure in sex are often mistaken for love.
- Know your needs and speak up for them clearly. A relationship is not a guessing game. Many people, men as well as women, fear stating their needs and, as a result, camouflage them. The result is disappointment at not getting what they want and anger at a partner for not having met their (unstated) needs. Closeness cannot occur without honesty. Your partner is not a mind reader.
- Respect, respect, respect. Inside and outside the relationship, act in ways so that your partner always maintains respect for you. Mutual respect is essential to a good relationship.
- View yourselves as a team, which means you are two unique individuals bringing different perspectives and strengths. That is the value of a team—your differences.
- Know how to manage differences; it’s the key to success in a relationship. Disagreements don’t sink relationships. Name-calling does. Learn how to handle the negative feelings that are the unavoidable byproduct of the differences between two people. Stonewalling or avoiding conflicts is NOT managing them.
- If you don’t understand or like something your partner is doing, ask about it and why he or she is doing it. Talk and explore, don’t assume.
- Solve problems as they arise. Don’t let resentments simmer. Most of what goes wrong in relationships can be traced to hurt feelings, leading partners to erect defenses against one another and to become strangers. Or enemies.
- Learn to negotiate. Modern relationships no longer rely on roles cast by the culture. Couples create their own roles, so that virtually every act requires negotiation. It works best when good will prevails. Because people’s needs are fluid and change over time, and life’s demands change too, good relationships are negotiated and renegotiated all the time.
- Listen, truly listen, to your partner’s concerns and complaints without judgment. Much of the time, just having someone listen is all we need for solving problems. Plus it opens the door to confiding. And empathy is crucial. Look at things from your partner’s perspective as well as your own.
- Work hard at maintaining closeness. Closeness doesn’t happen by itself. In its absence, people drift apart and are susceptible to affairs. A good relationship isn’t an end goal; it’s a lifelong process maintained through regular attention.
- Take a long-range view. A marriage is an agreement to spend a future together. Check out your dreams with each other regularly to make sure you’re both on the same path. Update your dreams regularly.
- Never underestimate the power of good grooming.
- Sex is good. Pillow talk is better. Sex is easy, intimacy is difficult. It requires honesty, openness, self-disclosure, confiding concerns, fears, sadnesses as well as hopes and dreams
75 Lessons that MUST be Learned in Relationships
- If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay. - Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.
- If you have ANY doubt in your mind about a man’s character, leave him alone.
- Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
- Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that’s not meant to be.
- Don’t force an attraction.
- Slower is better.
- Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.
- If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no you can’t “be friends.” A friend wouldn’t mistreat a friend.
- Have faith in God regarding your relationship, but don’t let faith make you stupid. God does things decent and in order.
- Don’t settle.
- If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
- If he keeps changing his mind about the relationship–take that as a BIG sign that he is unstable. Do you really want to be with a man like that?
- Don’t stay because you think “it will get better.” You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
- Honorable men take care of their business and aren’t involved in a whole lot of mess.
- The only person you can control in a relationship is you.
- There’s only one ‘reason’ a man dumps you; he doesn’t want you.
- Avoid men who’ve got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn’t marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?
- You really do have to kiss a few frogs before finding the prince.
- Always put yourself and your happiness first.
- Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
- Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.
- Like from the show Sex and the City, if he doesn’t call, he just isn’t that interested.
- Be honest and upfront.
- Know when to cut the cord, don’t be strung along.
- Don’t fall for the “I’m confused role”. Remove yourself from the situation to let him figure things out (but don’t wait for him, move on).
- If you want to have a clue as to how he will treat you, watch how he treats the WOMEN in his family (not just mom).
- There’s more than physical abuse, there’s emotional and mental abuse. If he causes any of them…flee.
- You cannot change a man’s behaviors. Change comes from within.
- Don’t let him place rules on you that he is not willing to follow himself — double-standard.
- Don’t EVER make him feel he is more important than you are…even if he has more education or in a better job.
- Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
- Demand respect and if he can’t give it, he can’t have you!
- Don’t compete with other woman, but be aware that men are attracted to what they see.
- If you think he is cheating, he probably is. Confront him right away and if you feel he’s lying, let him go.
- Actions speak louder than words.
- Never let a man define who you are.
- Never rely on a man for compliments, look to yourself for that.
- Never borrow someone else’s man.
- If he cheated with you, he’ll cheat on you.
- Just because he says he loves you, doesn’t mean that he won’t hurt you and it doesn’t mean that you are meant to be with him.
- To use painful hard-won wisdom — ‘get it right’ the next time.
- Know that you deserve to be the number one person in the life of the No.1 person in your life.
- Love is a verb …
- Learn to give up your lifelong task of trying to make someone unavailable-available, someone ungiving-giving, and someone unloving-loving.
- A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
- All men are NOT dogs.
- You should not be the one doing all the bending…compromise is a two way street.
- If you don’t love self…you can’t love anyone else.
- You cannot mend someone else’s broken heart.
- You need time to heal between relationships…there is nothing cute about baggage…deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.
- You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you…a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals…look for someone complementary…not supplementary.
- Dating is fun…even if he doesn’t turn out to be Mr. Right.
- NEVER give more in a relationship than you are getting out of it.
- Never become your man’s “therapist”.
- When actions and words conflict, believe the actions. Respond to the actions.
- A real healthy relationship requires two people. One person can end it – but it takes two to make it work.
- Don’t fall for the “I’m not the loving type”…when a man loves you there is nothing in this world (within reason) that he wouldn’t do for you.
- Make him miss you sometimes…when a man always know where you are, and you’re always readily available to him he takes it for granted.
- Give him his space…let him go out with his boys, don’t pressure him to spend time with you, You cant force a man to hang out with you.
- If you wouldn’t allow your daughter to be with him you shouldn’t.
- Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.
- Never move into his mother’s house.
- Provide financially for yourself and don’t depend on anyone.
- Never co-sign for a man.
- Never believe you have the perfect guy and he is so innocent.
- Never spoil your man; let him spoil you.
- Never let a man mess up your credit.
- When it’s time to let go; let go.
- Good men should be treated like good men.
- Don’t play games.
- Don’t fully commit to a man who doesn’t give you everything that you need.
- Keep him in your radar but get to know others.
- Compatibility in terms of educational attainment, values, beliefs, personal and career goals, and socioeconomic status, are important.
- Never date a guy who wears color contact lens.
10 No-Fail First-Date Conversations
This may be advice for men, but women can follow all of these talking points, too!
So you finally gathered enough courage to go talk to the cute redhead who caught your eye, but your friends aren’t impressed just yet. You finally develop the backbone to ask her out, and now your friends are impressed.
They ask where you plan to take her out, and, more importantly, what you’re going to talk about on that nerve-racking first date. Your knees begin to tremble uncontrollably, but fear not! Read this list and you will have the girl begging for seconds.
10: Avoid her past
Generally speaking, one should never ask about past lovers on a first date. In fact, this should be avoided until she initiates the topic (if she ever does). She might have been hurt or may still be in love with her ex. You also prefer to start with a clean slate, so becoming chummy with her and comforting her about past mistakes may not be the greatest strategy on the first date.
9: Got any brothers or sisters?
Usually, a safe topic of conversation is asking about siblings (but don’t ask her if she’s got cute sisters). Asking about her parents could backfire if they divorced or separated, especially when she was very young. But sisters and brothers usually trigger good feelings and score points for you, since you’re showing a caring side and an interest in her family life.
8: Traveled anywhere special?
A tricky way to spark a girl’s interest is by asking about her past travel destinations and where she intends on visiting in the future. The upside is that if she mentions a spot she always wanted to visit, lo and behold, here comes the knight in shining armor (that’s you, boy) who offers to make her dreams come true one day by taking her there. This also provides each of you with some insight about the other’s cultural background and openness to new adventures.
7: Drinks, anyone?
A topic of conversation, especially if the date is taking place at a restaurant or bar, is the kind of food and drinks each of you prefers. Not only can you gauge whether or not you share culinary preferences, but the potential topics are endless and provide you with a safe topic of conversation — unless, of course, you are dating someone with an addiction to food or alcohol.
6: Any career plans?
Asking a girl about her past education and whether she intends on returning to school is admittedly a double-edged sword. She might love to go on and on about her numerous academic achievements, but she might break down and admit that her current job has absolutely nothing to do with what she studied. In either case, you are provided with a golden opportunity to reassure and encourage her with an abundance of compliments.
5: How’s your job?
If you are years removed from your college years, then talking about work and career goals just might be a safer topic. Admittedly, you shouldn’t let her go into the mundane details about how fed up she is with her life, which would explain why she’s on her seventh margarita. But generally speaking, people like to brag about work, no matter how routine it is. It also gives you an idea regarding whether or not you are dating a future CEO or a waitress for life (not that there is anything wrong with that, of course).
4: Got any friends?
Ask her about her friends. Even if you do not know them, she will love to tell you about her circle of friends, how much they mean to her and where she met them (and all of the things they did together). Don’t doze off, though, my good man; this is when you get precious details about her. If you ever make it further than the first date, her friends are usually the best source to unearth the skeletons in her closet.
3: Free time frolicking
Does she Rollerblade, collect stamps or dance? How about sports? What kind of music does she like? These are the questions you must ask to determine how much of a bond exists between the two of you. Moreover, you gain some insight to follow-up questions.
2: Weekend’s peakin’
Not only do you get a clearer picture of what life with her will be like after the honeymoon, but you are also sending mixed messages, which is not entirely bad at first. Yes, mind games are childish, but keeping your cards at your chest gives you leverage. She will ask herself: “Does he want to see me on weekends?”
1: Be bold and look ahead
Now, assuming she is having a good time and she is looking at you with that sparkle in her eye… in other words, if her body language is positive, you can look ahead and talk about other things you could do together in the future. Admittedly, you do not want to rush too far ahead and scare her off, but if she’s enjoying herself, chances are she’ll be curious to see what other great adventures you have in store for her.
Get Talking
Use these topic ideas as a general guide. Be sure to ask her lots of questions, but the key is to listen to her answers and form new questions around those. And remember: Don’t be nervous. See the first-date experience for what it is: A good time with some good company, and that’s all. This way, you’ll be able to relax and have fun.
June 21, 2011 | Categories: Relationship | Tags: Advice, Ask an Expert, Conversation, Dating, First date, first dates, People, Person, Personal development, Question, Relationship, Rollerblade, Sexuality, Sword, Talk radio, Talking point, Topic-comment, Women | 2 Comments »