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Posts tagged “Thought

The Best Way To Solve The Problem: Give Up

Sometimes the easiest way to solve a problem is to stop participating in the problem.Sometimes the smartest choice is giving up.

I don’t think that giving up should be your primary method for dealing with problems. But there are certainly a lot of cases where it just seems to be the most intelligent answer.

The more I stop trying to force things to happen, the more they just seem to sort themselves out. The more I let things happen, the less time I spend trying to make them happen.

Giving up is really about honoring your feelings. It’s about giving up trying to force yourself into a

mold of societal shoulds and embracing your true self.

So here’s an invitation to…

  • Give up trying to be cool.
  • Give up your golden handcuffs.
  • Give up wanting to be a famous musician, artist, architect, thinker, writer, whatever-it-is. Maybe it’s smarter to make your purpose to have an impact, instead.
  • Give up wanting to be different for the sake of being unique.
  • Give up trying to be perfect.
  • Give up keeping relationships with people you don’t really like.
  • Give up trying to be the center of attention.
  • Give up trying to be important. (Focusing on community is usually more fulfilling.)
  • Give up achieving a lot of ego-driven goals.
  • Give up trying to be super-focused. Sometimes the most compelling ideas come from the most messy, unexpected sources.
  • Give up trying to be indie.
  • Give up trying to popular.
  • Give up caring about owning a lot of cool things, which keep you distracted from acknowledging that you don’t like what you’re doing with your life.
  • Give up trying to have a perfectly organized workspace and a zero inbox.

With that said, there are a lot of ways we think we’re doing good, but we’re really not.

Counter-intuitive to what you think, it might make more sense to…

  • Give up trying to be super happy all the time. Instead, settle for being peaceful.
  • Give up needing a reason to share your love. Being alive is reason enough.
  • Give up trying to be everything to everyone.
  • Give up trying to fit the mold of your race, astrological sign, job title, religious group, political party or other erroneous associations.
  • Give up caring about being the smartest, best and fastest. At least don’t let your ego get caught up in it.
  • Give up caring about “being a man” or “being a woman.” Or doing what is expected of your gender.
  • Give up sacrificing your life for an expensive degree that makes you feel important.
  • Give up trying to be ultra productive, especially if productivity is making you miserable.
  • Give up caring about having a respectable job, a respectable resume, and a respectable life. Replace following a template, with freestyling life.
  • Give up trying to constantly improve yourself. Sometimes too much self improvement can cause you to lose sight of the present.
  • Give up caring about doing what works.
  • Give up thinking you don’t have the time or skills to make your dreams a reality.
  • Give up caring about knowing everything in advance before you take action. Put yourself on auto-response instead.
  • Give up trying to always find interesting experiences and interesting things to do. Alternatively, be interesting and be interested.
  • Give up trying to live up to the expectation of your parents, your friends, your boss, and peers.
  • Give up trying to live up to the expectation of… yourself.
  • Give up trying to have a flawless body, perfect face, or an impeccable wardrobe. Care more about beautifying your mind and being a person who takes beautiful actions.

Trying to make things happen all the time creates a lot of unnecessary anxiety. It’s stressful trying to deny what is.

When I give up, I accept life as it is. No strings attached. No wishing things were different. If an action needs to be taken, I take it. But I’ve given up letting my happiness be dependent on athing.

Most of these problems only exist within our minds. They’re not real physical problems; they’re simply psychic, imagined obstacles.

It’s interesting how we seem to have so many problems, so many dilemmas. But most of the time the answer to solving them is doing nothing. Giving up.

So, what do you think? Has giving up ever helped you win?

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You Lie More Often Than You Think

“The individual who wants all their applause from outside has their pleasure in another’s preserving.” — Claudius Claudianus

Once, in a marriage training I was offering, I offered a research operate to each individual which essential them to make to lifestyle one complete 7 days with a wish to talk exactly what they were considering and sensation to those with whom they had any get hold of. This provided household, associates and even visitors. What I found was that many persons are considerably pushed in their capability to be genuine and obvious when it comes to saying what they really think to others. They are conflicted between what they really think, and their wish (need) to not chance the disapproval of others.

One fresh individual who came again the next 7 days and discussed how she was really able to recognize her need for endorsement and endorsement from others when she declined a demand from a buddy. She revealed that while, at first, it was unpleasant it was also the most publishing expertise she had ever known. She recognized that she had granted herself to be used hostage in every marriage she ever had been in because she was dependent to the endorsement of others. Buddha shown that connection is at the actual of all enduring. I wonder how many of us allow ourselves to expertise, being used in psychological nipple play (or better said, psychological blackmail) by others, not because of their requirements, but because of our own connection to being beloved and worry of denial or disapproval. Rob Waldo Emerson authored, “The only sin that we never reduce in each other is a distinction in viewpoint.” Bill Penn said it even more succinctly: “There can be no marriage where there is no independence. Friendship likes totally free air, and will not be fenced up in right and small enclosures.”

Are you totally able to have a distinction of viewpoint with others and communicate it without fear? Can you say no without fear? And, as well, do you supply others the same independence to say no to you without submitting them on a shame trip? If the very believed of that kind of expertise can make your pulse battle, perhaps it’s a chance to examine your capability to get to “no” others better.

Where do you start? Have becoming secure in understanding that beyond your egoic self (which grows on endorsement from others) there is within you the use of an unlimited energy performing as your “soul” specialist. While center always functions from unconditional like it never wants endorsement from others. Often periods, saying “no” can be the most caring element you can do for others and yourself. When you do your living from such a place of self-awareness you will know that if you are led to say no to someone there will be no need to you are, supply or warrant your location. Describe to them that you are not rejecting them, only their demand. Know who you are and be totally free.

In all your activities with others, keep in mind that it’s not so much what you say but how you say it. When someone can make a demand of you that does not obtain an real “yes” in your center, merely take in considerably and encourage a mindful knowledge of spirit’s location to be believed within you. Let your phrases be tv through that location and you will discover the energy and acceptance to say “no” in a way that is variety, caring and definitely apparent. Let nothing be partial in your emails currently and recognize how totally free you experience.

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Little Secret Makes A Big Difference

Today, I’ll let you on the little secret that will make a huge difference in the amount of success and happiness you have in your life.

It is very likely that you already know this secret (or at least heard of how powerful it can be), but it is likely that even if you know this secret, that are not applied. No matter what you believe, success and happiness are within reach. We hope that through this article, can inspire unlock the hidden potential so you can achieve happiness and success you want.

There are many things about life that do not understand or are not even able to understand, and yet are so ready and willing to make definitive facts about things that do not understand. We have a very limited knowledge of our universe, our planet, and even our own body and mind, but they are so quick to accept “scientific” facts and statements about these things than the truth.

These “facts” that we are so eager to accept the truth of constant change. It ‘became the norm, that new scientific studies and observations refuted the facts old (sometimes to the point where decades of faith in a fact or a system to shame).

Examples of this source:

Bloodletting was once found to be a cure for most diseases. Today, the bleeding is considered ineffective.

Margarine was considered much healthier than butter. Research suggests that there may be much healthier than margarine.

The eggs were considered bad because of high cholesterol levels. Now, it is said that eggs are not bad at all, and are very healthy for the body.

Alcohol in all its forms was said to be 100% healthy and should not be consumed. In a couple of years ago, a researcher said that red wine was really healthy for the heart but not other forms of alcohol. He added that all the alcohol in moderation has health benefits for them.

Chocolate and greasy foods is said to be one reason for acne. Now researchers say they do not contribute to acne in any way.

Homosexuality was classified as a disease.

Doctors thought the child was much better than formula milk for children. Now doctors say the opposite is said to be true.

Milk was once recommended for the coating of the stomach, and it would help to alleviate ulcers. Now, the idea of ​​milk are discouraged and have proven to actually worsen ulcers.

The diet had no effect on the disease or illness. Now people have told us that the diet has a huge impact on the prevention and causes of diseases and disorders.

Little Secret: Part 1

The little secret that will make a big difference in the amount of success and happiness in your life consists of two parts. As you may already be able to guess the above paragraphs relate to the first part of the dirty little secret is:

Do not accept any definition of the truth.

Buddha has a relevant quote that applies here:

“Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, no matter if I said, if you do not agree with your own reason and your own common sense.”

-The Buddha

It is very difficult to be happy or successful if you put limits on your abilities and potential. Limiting beliefs are ideas or beliefs that you have come to accept the truth that keeps you from reaching your full potential. I will not go in depth about the limiting beliefs in this article.

“Men often become what they believe. If I can not do something, that makes me unable to do so. But when I think I can acquire the ability to do so, even if not at first.”

- Mahatma Gandhi

What I want out of Part 1 of little secret is that you should never blindly accept the facts of any person, statement, or an indication of the truth, if the advice of your parents, your boss Your doctor or even the president himself ( except for emergencies). Do your own research and preparation before accepting something as true.

The little secret: Part 2

The second part of the little secret refers to the thinking and attitude toward life.

You have the freedom to see life in any way you choose. Anyone can be a place of abundance or scarcity, opportunity or accident. Journey of life can be considered one of the adventures, adventure and excitement, or it can be seen as a painful tortuous path full of obstacles and failures.

“Everything we have is the result of what we thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become.”

- The Buddha

As Buddha said wisely, “as you think it will be.” The thoughts that you focus your energy on what they unconsciously strive to reclaim their lives. If you choose to focus their thoughts on the negative or limiting beliefs and that is exactly what will remain in your life.

The second part of the dirty little secret is to think positive and always look on the bright side of things. To attract good fortune and success, you need to know what you want in life (ie your main goal) and you must focus your thoughts on these objectives. Focus on what you want and what you love to do, not what you want or what you can not do.

Tip: You can do much more than you think you’re capable of. Do not settle for something that is below their standards. Here’s a nice quote to remind you:

“I bargained with Life penny, and life would not pay more, but I asked for the evening, when I left my little shop.

For Life is a just employer, He gives you what you ask, but when you have set the wages, why you wear to work.

I worked for a rental home, only to learn dismayed, that any wage I had asked of life, life would be willingly paid. “

- Source: Napoleon Hill Think and Grow Rich

In summary: the dirty little secret of happiness and success

Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, no matter if I have said, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense. Do not let anyone tell you what is possible and what is not possible.

All we are is the result of what we thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become. Therefore it is important to focus your thoughts on the positive side of life, to see the bright side and focus on what you want in your life.

Just use this little secret you will attract more happiness and success in your life. This secret will also allow you to become a lot more confident in all areas of your life. Try for a month and let us know in the comments if it makes a difference for you.

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How To Maintain A Relationship

“When it comes to love, do not fall, but go, go with the idea that we must love yourself before loving another. It is imperative that trust before it can absolutely trust another and Most importantly, you must accept your flaws before accepting the shortcomings of another. “
Remember the last time you got in a fight or an argument with your partner? Was not it frustrating? Was not it painful? Was it necessary? What can we do to handle these situations without ruining our relationship?Relationships with spouses and girl / boy-friends can be one of the most rewarding of our lives. We keep a special place, someone with whom we shared many moments of joy. Personality differences are inevitable, and what makes us unique as individuals, can lead to disagreements and conflicts during the relationship.When these disagreements are not properly understood and managed emotionally, exchange banal mix full of fighting, and perhaps the end, what we have spent months or years to build.Yes, there is a relationship in which the figures are incorrect, and breaks are useful. However, many cracks are useless, as a result built on cycles of hatred and destruction. When they occur, we will experience tremendous pain and emotional hurt.To deal with our partners to increase awareness and a genuine desire to understand, we believe that the key to the welfare of these special reports.
Truth:::::::-

Before digging the ways in which we can overcome, disagreements and fights on the relationship issues, we give more detail what happens when you’re in this state of discomfort. Here are some insights into our discussion, we observed patterns.

Play a crying baby - We are becoming a baby. At any time during a fight, one of us is calm, while the other becomes a baby. This person becomes irrational, severe emotional, whiny and defensive. They say things they later regretted. When the baby finally expressed, it rises gradually becoming the clams, and changes the role of the other person becomes the crying baby.
Attention, appreciation, thank you - When we fall in the state crying baby, we’re really looking for attention, recognition, appreciation and care. The root of our emotional response when we are in this state seeks reinforcement of why we care.
Selfish and authoritarian - When our inner child we subsume, we are selfish and egocentric. We can not understand why our partner is not sympathetic. The more we try to express ourselves, the less they seem to connect what bothers us. In this state, we lack the ability to consider the feelings of our partner, and forget that they are injured.
Victim mentalityWhen we become a baby, we feel that we offer. Our minds are focused on finding evidence to support our story victim. By doing this, the other person is unreasonable. When we find our evidence, we begin to play scenes of ourselves as a sacrifice, and we play it repeatedly. We feel the pain in our hearts and we are looking for more pain and multiple causes of pain. To some extent unconsciously, we take this pain, because it allows us to play the role of victim, why feed our fear that life is full of painful relationships and no one really understands us.
 Right and wrong - At first glance, the battle comes down to who is right. We believe that we are right and we must prove that the other person is wrong. The disagreement quickly turns into a battle of egos. In this state, we have a strong desire to demonstrate to the other person that we are right after all.
Bottled Emotions - How the baby crying, we give a purely selfish thoughts that arise in our mind. Bottled emotions deep within us because those thoughts, but they are often linked to the situation. Take your emotions bottled does not mean that we can communicate our feelings. Often we are not even aware of these feelings until they manifest in our lives. For example, go and watch a movie, but we wanted to go see the movie first, then unconsciously sabotaging the film with a hiking problem complain of a bad place, or complain that the bus ticket is too long.
Alternative concept - We collect words expressed by the other person jump to conclusions and assume the worst. We find a way that serves us, but it is not the true meaning of their words for now. We say that this importance is the absolute sense and is final and permanent. The truth is that when we are irrational, we say all sorts of things that we do not go out with increased emotion.
Gender - men are so sensitive and emotional than women. The difference is in how men and women to express themselves, and this is often misunderstood. Here are some differences that we observe. Consider the following three things when playing: 1.) I am aware that this is a generalization, so bear with me. 2) When I say “women”, I mean the feminine qualities and trends of sex change. Similarly, when I speak of “men”, I mean masculine qualities. It is possible that a woman more traditionally masculine qualities and vice versa. 3) I’m using a few men and women in the examples, but applies to same-sex couples as well.
As women tend to hide our thoughts. When we are upset about something, it is assumed that the other person is a mind reader to know exactly what we think, without telling them. We took advice on being angry and frustrated. This is very frustrating for men (or women of other) because they want to help but can not seem to go anywhere and can not understand why we are so bad. In view of our partner does not pick up on our rates, we have even more angry and hurt.
That men, who tend to be more verbal, we think out loud. We internalize some or all of our feelings, our thoughts are externalized through speech or writing. Because we talk about our thoughts, often have problems with women in our lives, as they may be affected by what we say. The company has trained to be an alpha male ego, which acts as a barrier to defend the integrity and strength of character. The force that defines us and our thoughts, keeping our less-than-rock-steady guarded emotions. In fact, we are very perceptive and sensitive than society gives us credit for. It’s easy to feel that our women are not happy and want to help their new happiness. But she is still upset and are supposed to be mind readers. We do not know what you think. It is very painful. We want to say just exactly what we can do to be happy again.
Solutions
It is inevitable that members have different opinions and everyone has days when emotions can get the best of them. The problem is not that we have conflicts with our partner, the problem is how to handle the situation. When our egos in the way, our mind is clouded and you end up making a mountain out of a molehill.Some of us use these conflicts as an opportunity to respond: Is my relationship stronger than the problem? They use this as a way to measure the stability of relations. They can not see this issue in itself the causes of conflict, because it requires a comparison. Instead, a more efficient matter is: Are we mature enough as people to resolve conflicts with care, attention and grace?
Here are some tips that have proven effective in our relationships:

1. Awareness - To raise awareness of the situation. Become an observer of your thoughts, your feelings, your needs and your ego. Ask yourself
  • What I want right now?
  • Do I want my heart or filtered by my ego?
  • Do I want to help me become a better person?
  • I want to get that bring happiness and satisfaction for myself and those around me?
  • What are the most important aspects in my life? Is that between my values?
2. Express, do not remove - to speak frankly and freely. Yes, the truth may hurt, but if you are responsible for your words and speak with respect of the other person, honesty and sincerity of their message shines through. The other person deeply thank you for it. Honestly, not only frees up your mental load, but also contributes to mutual understanding.
3. Acknowledge your baby’s crying - to bring awareness of a situation, we will improve on the recognition that our partner is in the baby’s crying. When a baby is very beneficial if you remain calm. Do not take what they say personally in this state do not think so.
4. How to relieve baby - crying baby The state is a condition of origin. We become irrational and unreasonable. We feel that we are a small child cries for attention again. In this spirit, our partners can do to reassure us when we are in a way baby? Sit down with your partner beforehand to discuss openly what would make them feel better when they state that baby? For example, to calm the child in me I would be held and caressed. To reassure the child of Adam, he wants to focus on deep breathing to get out of this mindset. What reassures the child in you?
5. Pattern Interrupt - When we repeatedly do something, it becomes a habit. Instead of succumbing to a pleasant act does not give you the desired result, disrupt this pattern by doing something (shocking) independent or random. When you feel down in a negative spiral, get up and do 10 jumps with exaggerated movements, making faces, doing a happy dance around the room. This will help you bounce out of the state of mind.
6. “Look into my eyes” - If you can see that your partner is in a state of irrational, or a child is upset, ask them to look into the eyes, even for only 30 seconds. When they look into your eyes, look back in their eyes and imagine to spend an infinite amount of love for them. Through their eyes, looking for their soul. You can be upset too, just to get to the moment, take a few deep breaths and just focus on their eyes and how beautiful they are.
7. Breathing - Close your eyes and concentrate on your breathing. Take a few deep breaths and continue to breathe normally. Continue to do this for at least 5-10 minutes. Draw your attention in your lungs expand and contract. Feel the energy in the air brings. When you change your focus, you will need to change your thinking.
8. Ask yourself: ”Am I saying that I might win the battle?” – If the answer is yes, ask yourself to win this battle will make a difference in your life in 40 years? What about tomorrow?
9. Ask yourself: “What about me I do not like?” - Often, the arguments that we get are simply an extension of ourselves, if we realize that we at a later date. When we are quickly jumping to judge others, we are actually projecting that we do not like that person. observe our thoughts and behaviors toward others can expose our own insecurities about the subject.
10. Try different shoes - Imagine yourself in the shoes of your partner. To the best of your ability, to feel the pain the other person feels. How does it feel? What is the new perspective is that? After a few seconds, pretending that “we” does not exist, and that you are in the other person. The experience of their words and feelings as your own. This simple exercise will help give you the compassion and consideration for the other point of view.
11. “What made me feel.” - After having informed the angles, always talking about how something that made you feel. Example: “When I heard of you, made me feel that I was not important” .. Disclosure of how each of us feel rather than think about what they have done evil, to reduce their instinctive need to feel defensive. When people do not have any of the fence, are more likely to listen and be ready to solve the problem.
12. Step Out, Cool Off - Going to a different room, separated from him a moment to step back and clear. Do some deep breathing exercises. Re-group and become aware of the situation. Retrieve a clear understanding of what is most important to you, and re-evaluate whether the “war” worth fighting.
13. Listen - Listen to the other person. Really listen. Give them the respect they want, give them the opportunity to express themselves without judging them. Delivery time and just be there. Listen as if listening to yourself. Listen to them in the way you want to be heard.
14. Accept and forgive - Remember that inside we’re all good people. In fact, we are all born innocent, loving, kind and generous. Look, like you, that the light in yourself.
15. Apologies & Tell - say sorry and show that you understand and explain why you feel it. Do not be shy or let your pride get in the way. Life is short, do the right thing rather than good for your ego.
16. Abandon the defensive - to give up the need to be defended. Listen when the other person to express their feelings. Do not treat the words as a criticism, to listen to acceptance and a genuine desire to love them. This is not a power struggle, is a conversation. The expression of your feelings and needs of their partners do not have anything to do with you. And do not tell other people, “stop being so defensive.”
17. Focus on what they have done well - when we are angry with our partners, we tend to focus on what they have done wrong, and we believe that the characteristics of the defects of character. “What we focus on expands.” And these features confirm the most we focus on them. This in turn makes us even more upset. Concentrate on what he has done the right thing. Concentrate on the things that you love them. Focusing on the beautiful features that make them unique.
18. Stop finger - Investing guilty of fighting for survival. It is a natural progression for us to blame the incident and the comfort of the United Nations of other people or events that surround us. I too have done many, many times. At the end of the day, the only thing we can control ourselves, and our reactions to life situations. Can we really blame others for our unhappiness? Instead, look at ourselves and what we can do proactively to transfer our thoughts and understanding of the situation so that we can be happy? As one of my favorite quotes wisely says: “We can not control the wind, but we can control the sails.” So true.
19. Gratitude - I’ve always found it useful when you are depressed and argumentative to focus on the blessings in my life. By changing our focus, we can change our state of being away and continue to feel unwell. List of things they are thankful for today, close your eyes and thank all the parts of your body to function without end, to enjoy his life, a journal of all things they are thankful for today ‘Today or read a newspaper in his old list of gratitude.
20. Building a strong sense of self-esteem - I believe that the uncertainties arising from reports are the result of the uncertainties we have with ourselves. We must love ourselves before we can truly accept love from others. Set aside time to build relationships with ourselves, and in this process, we find that our uncertainties are persistent and end up falling in love with ourselves. Do not you fall in love so ego driven, but in the same way we experience the love and connection to all beings. Go to holiday, to spend time with yourself, you appreciate it, do the things that feed your soul. What is the love that you wish you could do more? For me, that reads.
What worked for you when dealing with those awkward moments in a relationship? What is your ideal perfect relationship?
Share your thoughts in the comments

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62 Rules to Build Your Self Confidence

Confidence is a tool you can use in their daily lives to do all sorts of interesting things, at least not at the second stop is conjectured, managing your fears and be able to do more things that really count for you.But few people realize that their self-confidence is like a muscle – it grows in response to the performance level required of it. Either you use it, or you lose. That’s why I gave you 63 ways to grow your confidence so you can become a giant.

  1. Learning is a good thing, sign up for this evening class and enjoy.
  2. Ridgemont, asking a partner or best friend, what you can do today.
  3. Go to the gym. Physiological effects will be felt much.
  4. Go to a networking event and focus on how you can be helpful to others rather than be afraid of your own stuff.
  5. Get crystal clear about the things that really matter to you. If they are not in your life, you must bring in.
  6. Write a list of things you tolerate and endure in your life, notice how you can remove, minimize or reduce each.
  7. Look at the great victory and success you have experienced give you credit for your role. In recognition of your achievements are not selfish, it’s healthy.
  8. The next time you’re at a social event, not just stick to people you know – go and have a conversation with someone you do not know and you never know what – or who – you will discover.
  9. The next time you are convinced to do something (to invite the parties, an ambitious project or anything else), for example, “What the hell” and go to do anyway.
  10. Do one thing every day that makes you smile (interior or exterior).
  11. Try to think that will take you to a place where you start over-thinking or thoughts. Now imagine that your best friend has gone through exactly the same thought and decided to hold back – tell them what you want?
  12. Ask that girl or guy you like his pants off (only if you have one, do not want to get in trouble).
  13. You must keep in mind the well-fed, so write a list of 20 things that keeps you feeling nourished and make sure you give them space in your life.
  14. Stop playing different roles and push you into boxes according to what you think people expect you to behave like.
  15. Learning to understand yourself every time you tell yourself that you may have, may or may not be enough to get what you want.
  16. Take yourself on automatic pilot – make deliberate decisions about what is really important to you.
  17. The next time you face a risk or challenge, to hear what you say and find a way that brings the internal dialogue can be improved. Ask yourself: “What would be easier to do this?”
  18. Fear of looking stupid? You and everyone else. It’s not biggie so do not let that stop you. Say it with me – “it does not matter.”
  19. Do not think for a second that you can not be sure. There are already many things you do with natural confidence, you just have to notice them and become familiar with how it feels. Look for things you do when the question of whether you are confident enough never arises.
  20. Listen to doubt, but is ready to take deliberate decisions when you hear about them. Sometimes the problems are there for you to know what you need to prepare, so you can use to your advantage as you move forward.
  21. Think of a time when he felt like a set of switches bank in your head deviated to the ON position and you were firing on all cylinders. What were you doing and what is the reason why he felt so great?
  22. You have a lot of outdated rules that determine what you do, do not, should or should not do. These rules limit their thinking and behavior limit. Break the rule book and notice how you are free to make good decisions.
  23. Do you get bored with you because you do not get the most out of something or take a step back into a chance? Do not beat, because that will only make you feel bad. Instead, be brutally honest and ask yourself what you learned from the situation and what they lost. Based on this win / lose balance, that is an option you can do differently next time?
  24. If you have already done everything in life you need not worry. Do not worry it means that you are not sure, it just means you’re going somewhere new.
  25. If anyone in your life that puts you down or make you feel weak, you must let them know you expect anything else from now on. You deserve better.
  26. Flirt. It is a harmless way of playing with the connection with people and have fun.
  27. Reveals some of the real you in a relationship can feel like it is in a rut.
  28. Recognize and accommodate all of your experiences – good and bad things. It is equally valid and to hide things away because you do not like them is just to create conflict.
  29. Always recognize that it is more than enough for any situation, you may find yourself, no matter how difficult things are.
  30. Do not get swept away the drama of what’s happening right now, to find the most useful way to engage in what’s happening in your life.
  31. Do not automatically pay for free time – this often means that you fall short.
  32. When you feel like stamping your foot and shout: “I deserve better than this!” Take a step back and say: “I can not be better than this.”
  33. Confidence sometimes means admitting you’re wrong – always be ready to take your hands and change your mind.
  34. Trust your instinct. They know what they’re talking about.
  35. Fear is a way to let you know that you are going to stretch yourself and confidence. It ‘a good thing, so use it for themselves forward rather than run away.
  36. Imagine that you are the successful visit, the secure version, attractive and dynamic in the future, a version of what they hope to be. What do they say?
  37. They do not feel like you have to do everything yourself – sometimes the safest way is to ask for help.
  38. Take a chance on something tomorrow. Anything big or small, just take a chance.
  39. You need to be with people that make you feel, in order to spend more time with people who support and encourage you and less with those who threaten you.
  40. Stop fighting against things you do not like in your life – to create an environment in harmony around you, flowing and lets you be you.
  41. No man is an island, and you must be a part of the world around you to feel safe. What can you participate in that are important to you?
  42. Forget the pros and cons – to do something bold face their challenges and fears.
  43. You will develop the skills necessary to overcome the things that interest you. What you can practice, which greatly improves your chances of winning?
  44. The body is a mirror of the mind, then move your body in a safe condition can have surprising results.
  45. Do not be discouraged or unmotivated when it comes to 90% with something that is working – through and you’ll drive the last 10% is where the magic happens.
  46. Keep comparing yourself to others? Stop, do not try to validate by comparison – which is just like you pink.
  47. Putting your head above the parapet at work and talk about something you think could be improved or if you have an idea you think is the legs.
  48. If anything it difficult to understand for a moment, stop trying to understand. Accept that as fully and completely.
  49. Shy with new people? Not a problem, there is nothing wrong with being shy does not mean you are not sure. Just do not think too much, you start to fight or think they are less, because you are shy – but think this is the worst.
  50. The environment directly affects the perception of self, so if you’re surrounded by clutter, documents and put the garbage in the morning set aside to clean up and organize your stuff.
  51. Do you write a list of amazing things you’d like to do in your life and make a fresh start by simply looking at one or both of the first things that hit you.
  52. Do not make your happiness or self-esteem depends on being in a relationship or it is approved by another. Find your intrinsic value first, and your relationship and trust will be immeasurably better.
  53. My strengths to overcome weaknesses. We all have weaknesses, but not only undermine your confidence if you let them.
  54. The longer you leave this great thing on your list to do more than that and it seems to drain more – is, and not yourself.
  55. What son of gold, themes, motives and passions have always been in your life? If these things are not present in your life now has to change its priorities.
  56. Your body image is important because if you have a bad relationship with your body, not having confidence in yourself. Get a seat, if necessary, just make sure that you get along with your body.
  57. Being confident is a continuous process. This is not a goal or a point you reach the end and then stop. Keep playing the best of your ability and your confidence will always be there to support you.
  58. Try a new path. The beaten track in your life can easily turn from the knowledge of apathy and disconnection. Wakes you up a new path.
  59. Do not say “yes” to take the job just because you do not want to rock the boat – You can politely refuse any request you may encounter and do not need to create and defend it.
  60. See you against people who seem confident – do not copy them, but to discover what they are doing in a different way, which is to convey trust and what you can learn from it.
  61. Make a plan to do something, then make a deliberate decision to move forward. Seeing the progress that has important self-reinforcing.
  62. When you feel to focus inward and become paralyzed by doubt or fear, to move outward to focus on what you can engage and interact with.

Yet you fight to fail or screw up? It may not be a barrel of laughs, but it will not help you get through. Much better to recognize that all, if it is or not, is how you practice a rich life.

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10 Rules to Start Meditating Right Now

Why meditate? On one level, meditation is a tool. It can help combat stress, fosters physical health, helps with chronic pain, can make you sleep better, feel happier, be more peaceful, as well as be present. But on a deeper level, meditation is a doorway into the unknown. It can help us get a sense of the mystery of who we are.

When you start meditating, you will notice how unruly the mind is. I remember being quite shocked by this! I noticed that my mind was all over the place. Profound thoughts about my past or future jostled with mundane thought clips about what groceries I needed to buy. Some time afterwards I would come too and notice that I had spend 15 minutes running a painful memory over and over. It was like sitting in a crazy cinema!

So, if you’re starting out with meditation, please don’t beat yourself up about your wild mind. It is a natural condition. In time you will learn to work kindly with the barrage of thoughts and you will some clarity and peacefulness.

Here are some simple tips on how to start meditating. Maybe those of you who already practise meditation could please add your comments of what has worked for you.
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1. posture

Whether you sit on a chair or cross-legged on the floor, make sure that your spine is upright with head up. If you are slumped your mind will drift. Mind and body are intertwined. If your body is well-balanced, your mind will also be in balance. To straighten up, imagine that your head is touching the sky.

2. eyes

Try and keep you eyes open. Open eyes allow you to be more present. Just lower your eyes and let your gaze be sort. If you close your eyes you will be more likely to drift away on thoughts and stories. However, it’s important to do what is comfortable for you. Some people find closing their eyes much more effective. It’s good to experiment and see what feels best for you.

2. focus

In ordinary consciousness we are hardly ever present. For example, sometimes we drive the car on autopilot while being preoccupied with thoughts. Suddenly we arrive at our destination and don’t remember anything about the drive!

So, meditation is a wonderful way of waking up to our life. Otherwise we miss most of our experiences because we are somewhere else in our mind! Let’s take a look at what focus is. In ordinary life, we tend to equate focus with concentration. That’s like using the mind like a concentrated beam of light. But in meditation, that kind of mind isn’t helpful. It’s too sharp and edgy. To focus in meditation means to pay soft attention to whatever you place in the centre of awareness. I suggest using the breath as a focus. It’s like a natural door that connects ‘inside’ and ‘outside’. Zen Master Toni Packer says:

Attention comes from nowhere. It has no cause. It belongs to no one

3. the breath

Paying attention to the breath is a great way to anchor yourself in the present moment.
Notice your breath streaming in and out. There’s no need to regulate the breath – just let it be natural.

4. counting you breath

If you are having difficulties settling, you can try counting the breath – which is an ancient meditation practice. On your outbreath, silently count “one”, then “two”, and up to “four”. Then return to “one”. Whenever you notice your thoughts have strayed far away or you find yourself counting “thirtythree”, simply return to “one”. In this way, “one” is like coming home to the present moment. It’s good to return without a backward glance.

5. thoughts

When you notice thoughts, gently let them go by returning yous focus to the breath. Don’t try and stop thoughts; this will just make you feel agitated. Imagine that they are unwelcome visitors at your door: acknowledge their presence and politely ask them to leave. Then shine the soft light of your attention on your breath.

6. emotions

It’s difficult to settle into meditation if you are struggling with strong emotions. This is because some emotions tend to breed stories in the mind. Especially anger, shame and fear create stories that repeat over and over in the mind. Anger and shame make us keep looking at past events of the past. Fear looks at the future with stories that start with, “What if…”

The way to deal with strong emotions in meditation is to focus on the body feelings that accompany the emotion. For example, this could be the tight band of fear around the chest or the hot roiling of anger in the belly. Let go of the stories and refocus on your body. In this way you are honouring your emotions but not becoming entangled in stories.

7. silence

Silence is healing. I know that there are is a lot of ‘meditation music’ around, but nothing beats simple silence. Otherwise the music or sounds on the tape just drown out the chatter in your mind. When we sit in silence we actually get to experience what our mind is doing. There is steadiness and calmness that comes from sitting in silence. In time outer and inner silence meet and you come to rest in the moment.

8. length

Start with 10 minutes and only sit longer if you feel that that is too short. Don’t force yourself to meditate longer if you are not ready to do that. In time you might like to extend your meditation to 25 minutes. That’s a length that allows you to settle your mind without causing too much stress on your body. Most importantly, shrug off any ‘shoulds’. Some people enjoy sitting for an hour at a time. Others find that they can’t sit longer than 10 minutes. Do what feels right for you!

9. place

It’s lovely to create a special place to sit. You can even make a shrine or an altar that you can face when you sit in meditation. You might like to place a candle on your altar and objects that have meaning to you. It’s lovely to find objects for your altar as you walk. Maybe you find stones, or seashells, or flowers that speak to you.

10. enjoyment

Most of all it’s important to enjoy meditation. You might like to try sitting with a hint of a smile. Be kind to yourself. Start sitting just a little each day. It’s helpful to establish a daily habit.

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The Ways to Live Life Fullest

It’s not fine. If you want to truly live life, to really experience it, to enjoy it to the fullest, instead of barely scraping by and only living a life of existence, then you need to find ways to break free from the mold and drink from life.

What follows is just a list of ideas, obvious ones mostly that you could have thought of yourself, but that I hope are useful reminders. We all need reminders sometimes. If you find this useful, print it out, and start using it. Today.

  • Love. Perhaps the most important. Fall in love, if you aren’t already. If you have, fall in love with your partner all over again. Abandon caution and let your heart be broken. Or love family members, friends, anyone — it doesn’t have to be romantic love. Love all of humanity, one person at a time.
  • Get outside. Don’t let yourself be shut indoors. Go out when it’s raining. Walk on the beach. Hike through the woods. Swim in a freezing lake. Bask in the sun. Play sports, or walk barefoot through grass. Pay close attention to nature.
  • Savor food. Don’t just eat your food, but really enjoy it. Feel the texture, the bursts of flavors. Savor every bite. If you limit your intake of sweets, it will make the small treats you give yourself (berries or dark chocolate are my favorites) even more enjoyable. And when you do have them, really, really savor them. Slowly.
  • Create a morning ritual. Wake early and greet the day. Watch the sun rise. Out loud, tell yourself that you will not waste this day, which is a gift. You will be compassionate to your fellow human beings, and live every moment to its fullest. Stretch or meditate or exercise as part of your ritual. Enjoy some coffee.
  • Take chances. We often live our lives too cautiously, worried about what might go wrong. Be bold, risk it all. Quit your job and go to business for yourself (plan it out first!), or go up to that girl you’ve liked for a long time and ask her out. What do you have to lose?
  • Follow excitement. Try to find the things in life that excite you, and then go after them. Make life one exciting adventure after another (with perhaps some quiet times in between).
  • Find your passion. Similar to the above tip, this one asks you to find your calling. Make your living by doing the thing you love to do. First, think about what you really love to do. There may be many things. Find out how you can make a living doing it. It may be difficult, but you only live once.
  • Get out of your cubicle. Do you sit all day in front of computer, shuffling papers and taking phone calls and chatting on the Internet? Don’t waste your days like this. Break free from the cubicle environment, and do your work on a laptop, in a coffee shop, or on a boat, or in a log cabin. This may require a change of jobs, or becoming a freelancer. It’s worth it.
  • Turn off the TV. How many hours will we waste away in front of the boob tube? How many hours do we have to live? Do the math, then unplug the TV. Only plug it back in when you have a DVD of a movie you love. Otherwise, keep it off and find other stuff to do. Don’t know what to do? Read further.
  • Pull away from Internet. You’re reading something on the Internet right now. And, with the exception of this article, it is just more wasting away of your precious time. You cannot get these minutes back. Unplug the Internet, then get out of your office or house. Right now! And go and do something.
  • Travel. Sure, you want to travel some day. When you have vacation time, or when you’re older. Well, what are you waiting for? Find a way to take a trip, if not this month, then sometime soon. You may need to sell your car or stop your cable bill and stop eating out to do it, but make it happen. You are too young to not see the world. If need be, find a way to make a living by freelancing, then work while you travel. Only work an hour or two a day. Don’t check email but once a week. Then use the rest of the time to see the world.
  • Rediscover what’s important. Take an hour and make a list of everything that’s important to you. Add to it everything that you want to do in life. Now cut that list down to 4-5 things. Just the most important things in your life. This is your core list. This is what matters. Focus your life on these things. Make time for them.
  • Eliminate everything else. What’s going on in your life that’s not on that short list? All that stuff is wasting your time, pulling your attention from what’s important. As much as possible, simplify your life by eliminating the stuff that’s not on your short list, or minimizing it.
  • Exercise. Get off the couch and go for a walk. Eventually try running. Or do some push ups and crunches. Or swim or bike or row. Or go for a hike. Whatever you do, get active, and you’ll love it. And life will be more alive.
  • Be positive. Learn to recognize the negative thoughts you have. These are the self-doubts, the criticisms of others, the complaints, the reasons you can’t do something. Then stop yourself when you have these thoughts, and replace them with positive thoughts. Solutions. You can do this!
  • Open your heart. Is your heart a closed bundle of scar tissue? Learn to open it, have it ready to receive love, to give love unconditionally. If you have a problem with this, talk to someone about it. And practice makes perfect.
  • Kiss in the rain. Seize the moment and be romantic. Raining outside? Grab your lover and give her a passionate kiss. Driving home? Stop the car and pick some wildflowers. Send her a love note. Dress sexy for him.
  • Face your fears. What are you most afraid of? What is holding you back? Whatever it is, recognize it, and face it. Do what you are most afraid of. Afraid of heights? Go to the tallest building, and look down over the edge. Only by facing our fears can we be free of them.
  • When you suffer, suffer. Life isn’t all about fun and games. Suffering is an inevitable part of life. We lose our jobs. We lose our lovers. We lose our pets. We get physically injured or sick. A loved one becomes sick. A parent dies. Learn to feel the pain intensely, and really grieve. This is a part of life — really feel the pain. And when you’re done, move on, and find joy.
  • Slow down. Life moves along at such a rapid pace these days. It’s not healthy, and it’s not conducive to living. Practice doing everything slowly — everything, from eating to walking to driving to working to reading. Enjoy what you do. Learn to move at a snail’s pace.
  • Touch humanity. Get out of your house and manicured neighborhoods, and find those who live in worse conditions. Meet them, talk to them, understand them. Live among them. Be one of them. Give up your materialistic lifestyle.
  • Volunteer. Help at homeless soup kitchens. Learn compassion, and learn to help ease the suffering of others. Help the sick, those with disabilities, those who are dying.
  • Play with children. Children, more than anyone else, know how to live. They experience everything in the moment, fully. When they get hurt, they really cry. When they play, they really have fun. Learn from them, instead of thinking you know so much more than them. Play with them, and learn to be joyful like them.
  • Talk to old people. There is no one wiser, more experienced, more learned, than those who have lived through life. They can tell you amazing stories. Give you advice on making a marriage last or staying out of debt. Tell you about their regrets, so you can learn from them and avoid the same mistakes. They are the wisdom of our society — take advantage of their existence while they’re still around.
  • Learn new skills. Constantly improve yourself instead of standing still — not because you’re so imperfect now, but because it is gratifying and satisfying. You should accept yourself as you are, and learn to love who you are, but still try to improve — if only because the process of improvement is life itself.
  • Find spirituality. For some, this means finding God or Jesus or Allah or Buddha. For others, this means becoming in tune with the spirits of our ancestors, or with nature. For still others, this just means an inner energy. Whatever spirituality means for you, rediscover it, and its power.
  • Take mini-retirements. Don’t leave the joy of retirement until you are too old to enjoy it. Do it now, while you’re young. It makes working that much more worth it. Find ways to take a year off every few years. Save up, sell your home, your possessions, and travel. Live simply, but live, without having to work. Enjoy life, then go back to work and save up enough money to do it again in a couple of years.
  • Do nothing. Despite the tip above that we should find excitement, there is value in doing nothing as well. Not doing nothing as in reading, or taking a nap, or watching TV, or meditating. Doing nothing as in sitting there, doing nothing. Just learning to be still, in silence, to hear our inner voice, to be in tune with life. Do this daily if possible.
  • Stop playing video games. They might be fun, but they can take up way too much time. If you spend a lot of time playing online games, or computer solitaire, or Wii or Gameboy or whatever, consider going a week without it. Then find something else to do, outside.
  • Watch sunsets, daily. One of the most beautiful times of day. Make it a daily ritual to find a good spot to watch the sunset, perhaps having a light dinner while you do so.
  • Stop reading magazines. They’re basically crap. And they waste your time and money. Cancel your subscriptions and walk past them at the news stands. If you have to read something, read a trashy novel or even better, read Dumb Little Man once a day and be done.
  • Break out from ruts. Do you do things the same way every day? Change it up. Try something new. Take a different route to work. Start your day out differently. Approach work from a new angle. Look at things from new perspectives.
  • Stop watching the news. It’s depressing and useless. If you’re a news junky, this may be difficult. I haven’t watch TV news or read a newspaper regularly in about two years. It hasn’t hurt me a bit. Anything important, my mom tells me about.
  • Laugh till you cry. Laughing is one of the best ways to live. Tell jokes and laugh your head off. Watch an awesome comedy. Learn to laugh at anything. Roll on the ground laughing. You’ll love it.
  • Lose control. Not only control over yourself, but control over others. It’s a bad habit to try to control others — it will only lead to stress and unhappiness for yourself and those you try to control. Let others live, and live for yourself. And lose control of yourself now and then too.
  • Cry. Men, especially, tend to hold in our tears, but crying is an amazing release. Cry at sad movies. Cry at a funeral. Cry when you are hurt, or when somebody you love is hurt. It releases these emotions and allows us to cleanse ourselves.
  • Make an awesome dessert. I like to make warm, soft chocolate cake. But even berries dipped in chocolate, or crepes with ice cream and fruit, or fresh apple pie, or homemade chocolate chip cookies or brownies, are great. This isn’t an every day thing, but an occasional treat thing. But it’s wonderful.
  • Try something new, every week. Ask yourself: “What new thing shall I try this week?” Then be sure to do it. You don’t have to learn a new language in one week, but seek new experiences. Give it a try. You might decide you want to keep it in your life.
  • Be in the moment. Instead of thinking about things you need to do, or things that have happened to you, or worrying or planning or regretting, think about what you are doing, right now. What is around you? What smells and sounds and sights and feelings are you experiencing? Learn to do this as much as possible through meditation, but also through bringing your focus back to the present as much as you can in everything you do.
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Simplify Your Life and Mind


Lives are so busy there is little time to just sit back and enjoy it. Unless one goes looking for a way to find peace and quite, it definitely isn’t going to jump out and offer itself to you. Not only are our lives busy with activity, but so is the mind and we constantly let it have a landslide of thoughts that stir up emotions, stress and active thinking that keeps you distant from the here and now with out being able to truly experience any one moment in the mind.

I wanted to share some ways that anyone can simplify life and live more in the now.

Simplify Your Life

  1. Ignore distractions and take advantage of how they often go away on their own.
  2. Don’t answer your phone every time it rings, stay in the moment of whatever you are doing and wait for a message
  3. Turn off your computer, your internet access on your computer or at least your popup notifiers (like email / IM) whenever you can
  4. Turn off your cell phone, don’t carry it constantly or even better, don’t have one! (This is my favorite way to simplify, I don’t have one myself)
  5. Move or buy a house close to work, to avoid driving
  6. Ride your bike or walk to commute and get around
  7. Give away things you no longer use or need
  8. Just buy less stuff
  9. Buy a smaller house than what you think you need (less space is more)
  10. Spend time reading, its a wonderful way to escape the complexities of each day
  11. De-clutter your living space
  12. Get out into nature
  13. Don’t rely on technology gadgets for everything, pen and paper work fine for more than people dare admit nowadays!
  14. Take up a creative hobby. Music, art, writing and building things helps you focus on just one thing.
  15. Finish what you start before switching tasks. One thing at a time
  16. Smile at and say hello to strangers
  17. Do some simple generous deed

Simplify Your Mind

People have an amazing ability to make things as simple or complex as we want and no matter what the task is, you can always make it simpler or more complicated. This is evident in many ways, many included in the list above. As a product development manager, I see this everyday in my workplace as we approach problems and plan software products. There is both a simple and complicated approach to everything. I’ve experience both and have learned that the complicated approach used to give me a sense of satisfaction that at the time, I thought was valuable and better than a simple solution. Over the years however, I’ve learned to drastically simplify things from a development perspective and now see evidence everyday of how it is better. All the complexities we build into things (as well as in our lives) causes more complexities as new things occur and makes change much more difficult. Think of it this way, changing your mind for some simple decision is easy. Changing your mind over something complicate that affects many other things however is far more difficult. This is true in everything we do and the complexities of life and in your mind prevent you from making change and even from learning.  Look for a simple solution, a simple action, anything that’s easy to just do, right now.


How to Develop a Positive Mental Attitude in Order to Achieve Everlasting Success!

As an emotion, faith is among the strongest and is a state of mind that mostly effects the subconscious mind.

This is important when it comes to putting your thoughts into action in everyday life.

If you set yourself a task but are lacking the faith in yourself to complete it, then subconsciously you are accepting defeat as inevitable.

However, if you are able to convince yourself subconsciously that you can achieve what you set out to do, then your efforts will be boosted and the results will reaffirm your self belief and strengthen your faith.

It is difficult for people to strengthen faith if they are lacking it.

However, it is achievable and is done by a process which involves encouragingpositive thoughts and emotions in the subconscious mind rather than negative ones.

This can be more clearly understood if you take a moment to think about how people fall into negative habits such as alcoholism.

When a drinker remembers their first ever drink they will more than likely say they did not enjoy it.

After becoming accustomed to drinking regularly and enduring the bad side effects they eventually start to embrace alcohol and eventually begin to rely on it.

This example suggests that if thought impulses of any kind are repeated and encouraged then that person will seek to express those thoughts through their actions.

If the thoughts are positive and result in constructive actions then faith may be strengthened.

If thoughts are backed by strong emotions such as faith and love then they have more chance of being expressed through actions.

Therefore your actions can be affected by any strong emotion whether it is positive and productive or negative and destructive.

If you are to become successful in whatever goals you have set yourself in life then you need to avoid negative emotions and encourage positive ones.

As a consequence you will acquire a subconscious mind that will start to act upon all the positive emotions including faith.

One of the most common causes of a lack of faith is low self confidence.

This can be over come through a similar process to the one just mentioned.

If you take the time to write down all your positive experiences and attributes and then read these to yourself daily, you will find that the repeated positive affirmations will reassure you of your accomplishments subconsciously and restore faith.

The following few principles outline methods to help with faith and self confidence.

Firstly you need to realize that you have the ability to meet your main objectives in life.

This means you need to be persistent at all times in chasing your aims even when there are signs of initial failure.

Secondly you must spend some time in the day just thinking positively about yourself and where you want to go in life.

A mind dominated by positive thoughts will eventually express desirable physical actions

Thirdly you should have your ultimate dream goal written down and you must promise yourself that you will never give up trying to achieve that goal even if you are not, at that time, confident enough, you will be eventually.

Fourthly you should take advantage of others to achieve your goals.

You will be able to succeed by putting the hard work in yourself which will make the rewards all the more sweeter.

A negative attitude to people will not bring success.

However, by making others believe in your ability you will reaffirm your self belief.

Repeat these principles and you will find that you are able to increasingly influence your subconscious mind.

This process of positive thinking has been called auto-suggestion and is a key to the success of many.

In short if you think that you will fail then it is likely that you will, but if you convince yourself that you will succeed then you have more chance of doing so.

The people that win in today’s world are the ones that know they can.



10 principles for peace of mind

1. Do Not Interfere In Others’ Business Unless Asked:
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others’ affairs.We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right direction, our direction.This thinking denies the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God..God has created each one of us in a unique way.No two human beings can think or act in exactly the same way.All men or women act the way they do because God within them prompts them that way.Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.
2. Forgive And Forget:

This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind.We often develop ill feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us.We nurture grievances.This in turn results in loss of sleep, development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure.This insult or injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by constantly remembering it.Get over this bad habit.Life is too short to waste in such trifles.Forgive & Forget, and march on.Love flourishes in giving and forgiving.
3. Do Not Crave For Recognition:
This world is full of selfish people.They seldom praise anybody without selfish motives.They may praise you today because you are in power, but no sooner than you are powerless, they will forget your achievement and will start finding faults in you.Why do you wish to kill yourself in striving for their recognition?Their recognition is not worth the aggravation.Do your duties ethically and sincerely.
4. Do Not Be Jealous:

We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind.You know that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but sometimes they get promotions; you do not.You started a business several years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only one year old.There are several examples like these in everyday life.Should you be jealous?No.
5. Change Yourself According To The Environment:

If you try to change the environment single-handedly, the chances are you will fail.Instead, change yourself to suit your environment.As you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you, will mysteriously change and seem congenial and harmonious.
6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured:

This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage.Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and accidents that are beyond our control.If we cannot control them or change them, we must learn to put up with these things.We must learn to endure them cheerfully.Believe in yourself and you will gain in terms of patience, inner strength and will power.
7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew:

This maxim needs to be remembered constantly.We often tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out.Know your limitations. . Why take on additional loads that may create more worries?You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your external activities.Reduce your material engagements and spend time in prayer, introspection andmeditation. This will reduce those thoughts in your mind that make you restless.Uncluttered mind will produce greater peace of mind.8. Meditate Regularly:

Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts.This is the highest state of peace of mind.Try and experience it yourself.If you meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend to become peaceful during the remaining twenty-three and half-hours.Your mind will not be easily disturbed as it was before.You would benefit by gradually increasing the period of daily meditation.You may think that this will interfere with your daily work.On the contrary, this will increase your efficiency and you will be able to produce better results in less time.
9. Never Leave The Mind Vacant:

An empty mind is the devil’s workshop.All evil actions start in the vacant mind.Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile.Actively follow a hobby.Do something that holds your interest.You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind.Your hobby, like social work or religious work, may not always earn you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement.Even when you are resting physically, occupy yourself in healthy reading or mental chanting of God’s name.
10.Do Not Procrastinate And Never Regret:

Do not waste time in protracted wondering ” Should I or shouldn’t I?”Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating.You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future happenings.Value your time and do the things that need to be done.It does not matter if you fail the first time.You can learn from your mistakes and succeed the next time.Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing.Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the past.
DO NOT REGRET.
Why cry over split milk?.

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