51 Lifetimes Instructions
- Have a company handshake.
- Look individuals in the eye.
- Sing in the bathtub.
- Own an excellent songs.
- If in a cope with, hit first and hit challenging.
- Keep techniques.
- Never quit on anybody. Wonders occur daily.
- Always take an outstretched side.
- Be courageous. Even if you’re not, say to be. No one can tell the change.
- Whistle.
- Avoid cynical reviews.
- Choose your lifetimes companion properly. From this one choice will come 90 % of all your pleasure or agony.
- Make it an addiction to do awesome factors for individuals who will never discover out.
- Lend only those guides you never proper want to see again.
- Never deny someone of hope; it might be all that they have.
- When doing offers with ! kids, let them win.
- Give individuals a second opportunity, but not a third.
- Be enchanting.
- Become the most good and passionate individual you know.
- Loosen up. Rest. Except for unusual life-and-death issues, nothing is as essential as it first seems.
- Don’t allow the cellphone to get rid of essential periods. It’s there for our advantage, not the caller’s.
- Be an excellent loss.
- Be an excellent victorious one.
- Think twice before burdening a companion with a key.
- When someone cuddled you, let them be the first to let go.
- Be minimal. A lot was done before you were blessed.
- Keep it easy.
- Beware of the individual who has nothing to reduce.
- Don’t get rid of connects. You’ll be amazed how many periods you have to corner the same stream.
- Live your lifestyle so that your epitaph could study, No Regrets
- Be strong and courageous. When you look again on lifestyle, you’ll feel disappointed about the
- things you didn’t do more than the your you did.
- Never spend an opportunity to tell someone you really like them.
- Remember no one creates it alone. Have a thankful center and stop wasting time to recognize those who assisted you.
- Take cost of your mind-set. Don’t let someone else select it for you.
- Visit visitors when they are in hospital; you need only remain a few moments.
- Begin each day with some of the songs.
- Once in a while, take the picturesque path.
- Send a lot of Valentine’s credit cost playing cards. Indication them, ‘Someone who believes you’re wonderful.’
- Answer the cellphone with passion and power in your speech.
- Keep a observe pad and pad on your bed-side desk. Million-dollar thoughts sometimes reach at 3 a.m.
- Show regard for everyone who performs for an existing, regardless of how easy their job.
- Send your family blossoms. Think of a purpose later.
- Make a person’s day by shelling out the cost for the individual in the car behind you.
- Become a person’s idol.
- Marry only for really like.
- Count your delights.
- Compliment the food when you’re a visitor in a person’s house.
- Wave at the kids on an excellent bus.
- Remember that 80 % of the achievements in any job is according to your capability to cope with individuals.
- Don’t anticipate lifestyle to be reasonable.
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Daily Life Minimalist
I do not have a regular program. I not need one.
I do, however, have routines on which I focus every day.
Don’t get me wrong, I used to have a regular program — before I stop my six-figure job to practice my interests and stay a more significant lifestyle. And I despised that program. Every day thought like Groundhog Day: awaken to a blaring security, shower, eliminate, put on a suit and tie, shell out an time or more in mind-numbing visitors, yield to the regular trappings of communications and calling and communications and events, clarify through even more mind-numbing visitors, eat something from a box in the refrigerator, search for avoid within the great box in the family place, clean my teeth, set the security, sleep for five or six time, start all over again in the day.
That was lifestyle most periods. The same thing over and over and over. Clean. Clean. Do.
And then last year I decided it was for me nowadays. I recognized working 60 to 80 time per 7 days to create the money to buy more unwanted stuff do not complete the avoid I thought inside. It only introduced more debts and anxiety and worry and solitude and shame and stress and worry and depressive disorders.
So I ended my program. Or, rather, I dealt with in my program for better routines.
It do not happen immediately, but over a few years I pared down my items, got into the best shape of my lifestyle, paid off my debts, jettisoned my TV, removed On the internet at property, left business United states, began seeking my interests, ceased buying useless, and began lifestyle a more significant lifestyle — a lifestyle centered on expansion and factor.
During that use of personal expansion I developed new routines I love, routines I look forward to each day, routines that create me happy: training, composing, reading, starting new contacts with persons, and building upon established interactions.
I am also creating the behavior of factor. I believe giving is lifestyle — we never experience truly in existence unless we promote other persons in significant ways. Giving a chance to Home for Human beings, regional soups living rooms, and various other community businesses has been a beginning on my process towards creating this behavior. I also love leading to the visitors at our website and impressive them to modify their lives, much like Leo and Zen Habits encouraged me to modify acquire.
Many visitors ask me what my regular day looks like now that I’m not required into an unwanted program. My answer is always the same: every day is a clear page, although there are routines I act upon regular.
Presenting last Friday as an example, this is how I experienced the day:
I automobile at 4:50am without an security, energized and rejuvenated. Currently my behavior is to get when my system shows me it’s relaxed. But there is no program.
I ate a bananas, consumed java, then authored from 5am to 11am. As I generally produce fictional stories, I prefer composing in the day when it’s peaceful and I’m nearest the wish community. My composing place contains only a workplace, a chair, a laptop, and my information — the only things I need. Nothing else. There is no mobile, no On the internet, no time — no disturbances. Just me and my behavior, which I love greatly. Each day I produce until I never experience like composing nowadays. But there is no program.
After a writing-fueled day (interrupted only by push-ups when or so), I went to the location store and alternated between pull-ups and push-ups under the midday sun. Being active is important for me, and I love it regular. But there is no program.
I bathed, fitted (jeans and a T-shirt), and went to a regional burrito joint to eat a small, veggie meal. I eat when my system shows me I’m greedy, no matter what time (I never own a watch). Some periods I eat meal at noon; other periods I might eat at 10am or 3pm. But there is no program.
After my meal, I went to my favorite cafe, purchased an natural tea, used their On the internet access to examine my mail and submit some composing online, then went to with some of the regulars (as well as some strangers). There were 37 communications in my mail, which was okay as I only examine mail two or three periods per 7 days. Sometimes more, sometimes less. But there is no program.
After two or three time on the On the internet, I went to a store, sat on a common, and study a novel while the sun set fire to the sky. Some periods this behavior challenges me to use part after part, time after hour; other periods I study for only 30 minutes. But there is no program.
After a few sections, I hit the gym with my best good friend (and online composing pal), He Nicodemus, and experienced some cardiovascular and weightlifting. We habitually examine out the gym four or five periods per 7 days. We drop by at different periods each day. But there is no program.
Throughout the day I made sure I was moisturized. Besides java and natural tea, I consumed only water. No alcohol. No sweet products. No soda pop (or ‘pop,’ for those of us in the Midwest). I attempt to consume my fat in oz. of water each day, which is not always easy — so sometimes I consume only 50 percent that. But which is okay: there is no program.
I own a car, but I do not generate it on Friday. I do not need to. It was a nice day, so I went instead (even though Dayton, Oh, is not exactly the most walkable city in the world). Some periods I need to generate to where I want to go; other periods I can walk. But there is no program.
Later that evening I experienced meal and a discussion with a good friend, and afterwards we went to a regional show. Other periods I might view a movie at the independent movie or examine out a buddy’s house or shell out quantity of an art collection or offer a few use of time, all routines I love. But there is no program.
After the show, I went a few distance by myself, getting my thoughts. It had been a wonderful day, followed by a wonderful night — a denim jeans sky lit by a declining cres celestial satellite, a thousand diamond jewelry afire, and the possibility of a new day at nighttime.
The great news is my lifestyle is no different than yours, without the program. Sure, the details are different, the situations are different, but we all have the same 24 quantity of a day. We all have one lifestyle to stay, and that lifestyle is driving by one day at once. The only real difference is within the selections we create and the behavior we take.
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Little Secret Makes A Big Difference
Today, I’ll let you on the little secret that will make a huge difference in the amount of success and happiness you have in your life.
It is very likely that you already know this secret (or at least heard of how powerful it can be), but it is likely that even if you know this secret, that are not applied. No matter what you believe, success and happiness are within reach. We hope that through this article, can inspire unlock the hidden potential so you can achieve happiness and success you want.
There are many things about life that do not understand or are not even able to understand, and yet are so ready and willing to make definitive facts about things that do not understand. We have a very limited knowledge of our universe, our planet, and even our own body and mind, but they are so quick to accept “scientific” facts and statements about these things than the truth.
These “facts” that we are so eager to accept the truth of constant change. It ‘became the norm, that new scientific studies and observations refuted the facts old (sometimes to the point where decades of faith in a fact or a system to shame).
Examples of this source:
Bloodletting was once found to be a cure for most diseases. Today, the bleeding is considered ineffective.
Margarine was considered much healthier than butter. Research suggests that there may be much healthier than margarine.
The eggs were considered bad because of high cholesterol levels. Now, it is said that eggs are not bad at all, and are very healthy for the body.
Alcohol in all its forms was said to be 100% healthy and should not be consumed. In a couple of years ago, a researcher said that red wine was really healthy for the heart but not other forms of alcohol. He added that all the alcohol in moderation has health benefits for them.
Chocolate and greasy foods is said to be one reason for acne. Now researchers say they do not contribute to acne in any way.
Homosexuality was classified as a disease.
Doctors thought the child was much better than formula milk for children. Now doctors say the opposite is said to be true.
Milk was once recommended for the coating of the stomach, and it would help to alleviate ulcers. Now, the idea of milk are discouraged and have proven to actually worsen ulcers.
The diet had no effect on the disease or illness. Now people have told us that the diet has a huge impact on the prevention and causes of diseases and disorders.
Little Secret: Part 1
The little secret that will make a big difference in the amount of success and happiness in your life consists of two parts. As you may already be able to guess the above paragraphs relate to the first part of the dirty little secret is:
Do not accept any definition of the truth.
Buddha has a relevant quote that applies here:
“Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, no matter if I said, if you do not agree with your own reason and your own common sense.”
-The Buddha
It is very difficult to be happy or successful if you put limits on your abilities and potential. Limiting beliefs are ideas or beliefs that you have come to accept the truth that keeps you from reaching your full potential. I will not go in depth about the limiting beliefs in this article.
“Men often become what they believe. If I can not do something, that makes me unable to do so. But when I think I can acquire the ability to do so, even if not at first.”
What I want out of Part 1 of little secret is that you should never blindly accept the facts of any person, statement, or an indication of the truth, if the advice of your parents, your boss Your doctor or even the president himself ( except for emergencies). Do your own research and preparation before accepting something as true.
The little secret: Part 2
The second part of the little secret refers to the thinking and attitude toward life.
You have the freedom to see life in any way you choose. Anyone can be a place of abundance or scarcity, opportunity or accident. Journey of life can be considered one of the adventures, adventure and excitement, or it can be seen as a painful tortuous path full of obstacles and failures.
“Everything we have is the result of what we thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become.”
- The Buddha
As Buddha said wisely, “as you think it will be.” The thoughts that you focus your energy on what they unconsciously strive to reclaim their lives. If you choose to focus their thoughts on the negative or limiting beliefs and that is exactly what will remain in your life.
The second part of the dirty little secret is to think positive and always look on the bright side of things. To attract good fortune and success, you need to know what you want in life (ie your main goal) and you must focus your thoughts on these objectives. Focus on what you want and what you love to do, not what you want or what you can not do.
Tip: You can do much more than you think you’re capable of. Do not settle for something that is below their standards. Here’s a nice quote to remind you:
“I bargained with Life penny, and life would not pay more, but I asked for the evening, when I left my little shop.
For Life is a just employer, He gives you what you ask, but when you have set the wages, why you wear to work.
I worked for a rental home, only to learn dismayed, that any wage I had asked of life, life would be willingly paid. “
- Source: Napoleon Hill Think and Grow Rich
In summary: the dirty little secret of happiness and success
Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who said it, no matter if I have said, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense. Do not let anyone tell you what is possible and what is not possible.
All we are is the result of what we thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become. Therefore it is important to focus your thoughts on the positive side of life, to see the bright side and focus on what you want in your life.
Just use this little secret you will attract more happiness and success in your life. This secret will also allow you to become a lot more confident in all areas of your life. Try for a month and let us know in the comments if it makes a difference for you.
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Truths That Will Improve Your Life
They say life is what we make of it. By the end of this post, I hope to have helped you decide whether that statement is true or not.
There is no doubt that life has its ups and downs. However, how we deal with them can sometimes make all the difference. Today I want to share eight truths that I’ve come to learn from life. There’s also a message in each that I think we can all learn from, and when applied, will improve our lives infinitely.Some of these lessons may be old-hat for you. If so, look for ways to refine the idea to ensure your getting the most out of it. On the other hand, you may completely disagree with an idea or two and that’s great! Let us know your thoughts so we can all learn from each other.
- Friends Come and Go
When I was in high school, I always imagined spending most of my life with the same people. Then when I realized I had to move to college, that all changed. Once again, I made some close college friends but left them all behind when I moved from the UK to South Africa.Friends will always come and go in your life; even though I’m back in the UK now, all my friends are in university around the country and not exactly in meeting distance. It can be a hard thing to accept, but many of the friends you spend time with now, might not be around in the next few years.Important Lesson: There are an abundance of amazing people out there for you to meet and build relationships with. If you don’t have many friends, don’t stress, there are literally billions of friendship possibilities.
- You Won’t Always Get What You Want
I remember one Christmas when the only thing I had asked for was some second hand turntables for DJ’ing. I didn’t ask for anything else so I was pretty sure I would get them. However, they didn’t come and I ended up having to save for 10 months on my own in order to purchase them.You won’t always get what you want in life: people are going to be late, people will let you down, items you want won’t always be available.Important Lesson: Don’t look for happiness in material possessions and if things don’t go your way, learn to accept them. Life’s too short to stay miserable.
- Many People Will Love You, but Many Will Not
Whether you are a celebrity, a charity worker or just a normal guy, there are going to be people that love you and what you do, but there’s also going to be plenty people that don’t like you. There are many possible reasons such as jealousy, similarities to them, or just not being someone’s ‘type’.Important Lesson: Not everyone is always going to like you, and that’s fine. If people want to spend time talking about you then that is their problem. You are perfect as you are. You shouldn’t need everyone to like you to have some form of self-esteem.
- Nobody Can Transform Your Life Like You Can
Wouldn’t it be lovely if we didn’t have to go up on stage, but we could just read a paragraph of a blog post and become a perfect public speaker? Or, wouldn’t it be nice if our friends could do daring things, and we would benefit from them as well?The support and help of others can only take you so far, you’re going to have to do your own thing to make big changes in your life situation.Important Lesson: Do things for yourself and learn to stand on your own two feet. People you rely on won’t be around forever, and you don’t want to have to use others as a crutch to get anywhere in life.
- You Are Going to Fail
I built more than 7 websites before I created one that actually started making me any money. I even put hundreds of hours into my own company that I actually closed down last month. Whether it is exams, projects, companies, or even the odd pub quiz, there are times when you will fail to meet your goals.As the saying goes – “Only those who are asleep make no mistakes”.Important Lesson: You can learn a lot from others, but it is your own failures that are going to teach you the most valuable lessons in life. Learn from your failures, embrace them, and use them to drive you on to success.
- Rain Will Sometimes Cancel Play
On some occasions when you have your shorts on and you’re ready for the beach, it’s going to rain. Or, when you get to that first hole and you’re ready to tee off – the clouds will open. Things aren’t always going to go how you would like them to.Important Lesson: Don’t stress about the things that you can’t control. Learn to live with things that happen. You can’t change the past, but you can change how you react to things.
- There May Be No Tomorrow
At least, not for you anyway. We never know what is around the corner, a car crash, a heart attack; heck…even the end of the world is possible. Let’s face it, although we would all like to live till we are 70 years old, that’s certainly not always the case. There will be one day that is our last.Important Lesson: Make the most of each day. Make sure the people you care about actually know it, don’t worry about little matters, just make sure you spend time doing the things you love.- Someone Else Will Always Have More
Whether it is money, partners, friends or even blog subscribers, there will always be areas where other people have more than you. That isn’t to say you can’t become abundant in whatever you want (i.e. someone always had more money than Warren Buffett until 2008 when he was noted to be the richest man in the world).The wanting of more actually holds a very important lesson…Important Lesson: Just because someone has ‘more’, that doesn’t mean they are happy. Read the biography of any celebrity and they will tell you they enjoy their process of earning money, rather than what money can do to make them happy. In other words, focus on what you love, not what the thing you love can get you.
- Extra: Linking all the lessons here together is actually quite simple, and I can share the majority of what you need to know to enjoy life in a few simple bullet points:
- Live life for the moment
- Accept what is, even if things don’t go your way
- Happiness is here, right now if you stop resisting and start accepting
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Things You Need to Give Up Today
When you stop chasing the wrong things, you give the right things a chance to catch you.
So starting today…
- Give up trying to be perfect.
– The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done.
Read Getting Things Done
.
- Give up comparing yourself to others. – The only person you are competing against is yourself.
- Give up dwelling on the past or worrying too much about the future. – Right now is the only moment guaranteed to you. Right now is life. Don’t miss it.
- Give up complaining. – Do something about it.
- Give up holding grudges. – Grudges are a waste of perfect happiness.
- Give up waiting. – What we don’t start today won’t be finished by tomorrow. Knowledge and intelligence are both useless without action.
- Give up lying. – In the long-run the truth always reveals itself. Either you own up to your actions or your actions will ultimately own you.
- Give up trying to avoid mistakes. – The only mistake that can truly hurt you is choosing to do nothing simply because you’re too scared to make a mistake.
- Give up saying, “I can’t.” – As Henry Ford put it, “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you are right.”
- Give up trying to be everything to everyone. – Making one person smile can change the world. Maybe not the whole world, but their world. Start small. Start now.
- Give up thinking you’re not ready. – Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises. Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.
- Give up setting small goals for yourself. – Many people set small goals because they’re afraid to fail. Ironically, setting these small goals is what makes them fail.
- Give up trying to do everything by yourself. – You are the sum of the people you spend the most time with. If you work together, you will be far more capable and powerful than you ever could have been alone.
- Give up buying things you don’t need. – Manage your money wisely so your money does not manage you. Do not spend to impress others. Do not live life trying to fool yourself into thinking wealth is measured in material objects. Read I Will Teach You To Be Rich
.
- Give up blaming others for your troubles. – The extent to which you can live your dream life depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life. When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give others power over that part of your life.
- Give up making mountains out of molehills. – One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: “Will this matter in one year’s time? Three years? Five years? If not, then it’s not worth worrying about.
- Give up trying to live up to the expectations of others. – Work on it for real and exceed your own expectations. Everything else will fall into place.
- Give up the ‘easy street’ mentality. – There is too much emphasis on finding a ‘quick fix’ in today’s society. For example taking diet pills to lose weight instead of exercising and eating well. No amount of magic fairy dust replaces diligent, focused, hard work.
- Give up making promises you can’t keep. – Don’t over-promise. Over-deliver on everything you do.
- Give up letting your thoughts and feelings bottle up inside. – People are not mind readers. They will never know how you feel unless you tell them.
- Give up beating around the bush. – Say what you mean and mean what you say. Communicate effectively.
- Give up avoiding change. – However good or bad a situation is now, it will change. That’s the one thing you can count on. So embrace change and realize that change happens for a reason. It won’t always be easy or obvious at first, but in the end it will be worth it.
- Give up your sense of entitlement. – Nobody is entitled to anything in this world. We are all equal. We breathe the same air. We get what we give. We get what we earn.
- Give up waiting until the last minute. – Those who fail to plan, plan to fail.
- Give up being dramatic. – Stay out of other people’s drama and don’t needlessly create your own.
- Give up being anti-athletic. – Get your body moving! Simply take a long, relaxing walk or commit 30 minutes to an at-home exercise program like the P90X workout
.
- Give up junk food. – You are what you eat. Read The 4-Hour Body
.
- Give up eating as a means of entertainment. – Don’t eat when you’re bored. Eat when you’re hungry.
- Give up foolish habits that you know are foolish. – Don’t text and drive. Don’t drink and drive. Don’t smoke. Etc.
- Give up relationships with people who bring you down. – Saying “no” to right people gives you the time and resources required to say “yes” to right opportunities. Spend time with nice people who are smart, driven and likeminded.
- Give up being shy. – Network with people. Meet new people. Ask questions. Introduce yourself.
- Give up worrying about what others think of you. – Unless you’re trying to make a great first impression (job interview, first date, etc.), don’t let the opinions of others stand in your way. What they think and say about you isn’t important. What is important is how you feel about yourself.
- Give up trying to control everything. – Life is an unpredictable phenomenon. No matter how good or bad things seem right now, we can never be 100% certain what will happen next. So do you best with what’s in front of you and leave the rest to the powers above you.
- Give up doing the same thing over and over again. – In order to grow, you must expand your horizons and break free of your comfort zone. If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting.
- Give up following the path of least resistance. – Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile. Don’t find the easy way out. Do something extraordinary.
- Give up persistent multi-tasking. – Do one thing at a time and do it right.
- Give up thinking others are luckier than you. – The harder you work, the luckier you will become.
- Give up filling every waking moment with commitments and activities. – It’s okay to be alone. It’s okay to do nothing sometimes. Think. Relax. Breathe. Be.
- Give up making emotional decisions. – Don’t let your emotions trump your intelligence. Slow down and think things through before you make any life-changing decisions.
- Give up doing the wrong things just because you can get away with it. – Just because you can get away with something doesn’t mean you should do it. Think bigger. Keep the end in mind. Do what you know in your heart is right.
- Give up focusing on what you don’t want to happen. – Focus on what you do want to happen. Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story. If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right.
- Give up taking yourself so seriously. – Few others do anyway. So enjoy yourself and have a little fun while you can.
- Give up spending your life working in a career field you’re notpassionate about. – Life is too short for such nonsense. The right career choice is based on one key point: Finding hard work you love doing. So if you catch yourself working hard and loving every minute of it, don’t stop. You’re on to something big. Because hard work ain’t hard when you concentrate on your passions. Read The 4-Hour Workweek
.
- Give up thinking about the things you don’t have. – Appreciate everything you do have. Many people aren’t so lucky.
- Give up doubting others. – People who are determined do remarkable things. Remember, the one who says it can’t be done should never interrupt the one doing it.
- Give up fussing with every beauty product on the market. – Good looks attracts the eyes. Personality attracts the heart. Be proud to be you. That’s when you’re beautiful.
- Give up trying to fit in. – Don’t mold yourself into someone you’re not. Be yourself. Oftentimes, the only reason they want you to fit in is that once you do they can ignore you and go about their business.
- Give up trying to be different for the sake of being different. – Nonconformity for the sake of nonconformity is conformity. When people try too hard to be different, they usually end up being just like everyone else who is trying to be different. Once again, be yourself.
- Give up trying to avoid risk. – There’s no such thing as ‘risk free.’ Everything you do or don’t do has an inherent risk.
- Give up putting your own needs on the back burner. – Yes, help others, but help yourself too. If there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.
And remember, mistakes make us human, failures help us grow, hope keeps us going and love is the reason we’re alive. So keep learning, loving and living. Never give up on yourself.
This Excellent Article comes from marcandangel
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15 Steps to a Balanced and Happy Marriage
The other day my husband and I were talking about our marriage and how happy we are together. Then we somehow started talking about our friends and how some of their marriages and relationships didn’t work out. It was sad to see some of them go through painful divorces or experience great disappointments in people who were considered their second halves just a while back.
It’s not a secret that rates of divorces are rising like crazy all over the world now (in the United States 50% of all marriages end in divorce and in Ukraine the rates are just a little bit lower). I am not going to go into the details of why it is happening but I would like to share my experience of a happy and balanced marriage. I hope that maybe these tips will help some couples to live happily ever after.
- Be honest with each other. I think marriage and any serious relationship starts with honesty.
My husband is a scuba diver and he has a few scuba buddies. If you do not know much about diving then I want to share one secret: it is EXTREMELY expensive (you need at least $3000 on average to get your own gear and as you become better at it you will want more expensive and more professional equipment). For the reason that I cannot figure out scuba diving is a real addiction for men and they cannot stop buying new equipment no matter how much they have already (my husband is past that point thankfully
) Back to the scuba buddies, these guys are married and they hide their new equipment from their wives. Every time they buy something new they try to sneak around and get it delivered when their wives are not home, then they hide it real good to make sure that their wives do not know how much they’ve just spent (my husband has never done anything like this, phew!). One of these guys has just divorced and now they are fighting over the custody of the children. I can’t imagine living with a person who is not honest with me, neither does my husband and I do not have much hope in marriages that are based on lies and sneaking around. - Do not only say “I love you,” show it.
My parents divorced when I was about 10 years old. I remember my dad always talking a lot about how much he loved my mom and me but he never showed it. He never helped my mom around the house, he never helped her financially to raise me after the divorce, and he never tried hard enough to be a good husband and a good dad.
It is important to show your partner your love. It can be support in a difficult situation, help around the house or with the kids, a romantic night out or a timely hug when you are feeling blue.
- In a relationship you are a team and not two solo players. When you are married you lose some of your “I” and turn it into “We.” Marriage is like a football game (without getting slammed though
). A person who does not know the rules will look at the field and see a bunch of big guys running around, jumping on each other and acting completely irrational. A person who knows the rules will see a strategy behind every move. Each player has his own role on the field and each of the players is responsible for the final score. In a marriage it is important to have your own life and your own interests, however happy couples know that all these interests are worthless if they do not benefit their team. There is a great movie called Facing the Giants that continues this analogy (this is a Christian movie). Another one of my favorites is Fireproof and I think that all couples need to watch it because it is a wonderful and inspiring movie. - Keep romance burning in your relationship. There is nothing worse than a boring and unromantic relationship. When women start wearing hair rollers and shower caps around the house and when men spend all their time on the coach with a bottle of beer in their hands you can say that this relationship is doomed. Here are 10 ways to turn a boring relationship into a party of love and I am sure that you can think of at least 100 more.
- Be best friends. A marriage based only on friendship is hardly possible, but a marriage without friendship is doomed. What do friends do? They talk, they share their most intimate thoughts, they share their joys and sorrows, they have fun together, and they help and support each other. Can you imagine a marriage without all this? I can’t.
- Let little things slide. This tip is mostly meant for women because a lot of us (women) go crazy about little things like dirty socks around the house, a glass that was left in the wrong place or the wrong type of produce that he picked up at the grocery store. Men can think only about one thing at a time (these are words of my husband, no offense guys). When they think about a nice bottle of wine that they want to bring home for supper they forget whether you wanted Romaine lettuce or spinach. When they think about a football game they forget where they leave their glass and when they are ready to cuddle up with you under a blanket they forget where they threw their socks. Look at the big picture and enjoy a deep relationship and bond with your partner, after all nobody is perfect.
- Talk. When I say “talk” I do not mean just talking about what refrigerator you have to buy or what happened at work during the day. I mean talking about everything: about friends, about news, about your interests, about your concerns and about 100 more subjects. My husband and I lose track of time when we start talking to each other and I love this time more than anything else in the world (well, almost anything
). Talking will help you understand what is going on in the head of your spouse, what bothers him/her, it will help you to resolve and prevent conflicts and misunderstandings if they arise (the worst thing is to keep a grudge inside and let it destroy your marriage). - Be silent. Sounds contradictory to what I’ve just said, right? If you and your partner argue (it happens to the best of us) then you are likely to say something that you do not really mean. When we are upset we tend to pick the most stinging words that can hurt your partner’s trust and faith in you permanently. I find that it is much better to be silent in these situations and to let both of us cool down a little bit. After the smoke has cleared and you can think rationally again you can talk the whole situation over and most likely you will find an easy solution or explanation that will satisfy both of you.
- Be equally responsible for the family and household. This is a tip for men. A lot of men mention that marriage kills romance and that their wives become less interested in sex and fun activities that they used to enjoy before. This is really true because a lot of women get so tied up in household problems and bringing up children (not mentioning the fact that a lot of women are also working at the same time) that they do not have any energy left for anything else.
Most men still think that a woman is a 100% responsible for bringing up children and taking care of the household. How many men change about half the amount of diapers that women do? How much time do men spend with the children when the kids are in a bad mood? How often do men think about what to fix for supper or when to vacuum the house? If you are one of the men who does it all or is willing to do it all then your wife is (will be) a very happy woman (my husband is all I’ve just mentioned and even more
). How would you expect a woman to think about a romantic night when she has been changing dirty diapers all day long and her personal time was limited to 5 minutes in the shower? A marriage puts a lot of responsibilities on both a man and a woman and if you want a happy and sexy wife then you need to give her some help and some free time. - Smile and laugh together. According to a recent study people who smile a lot have lower rates of divorce. Researchers are not quite sure about the connection between smiling and happy marriages but having great time together and laughing a lot will help you become more positive about your relationship and life in general.
Here are 5 more rules that do not need any explanation in my opinion.
- Love each other
- Respect each other
- Support each other
- Understand each other
- Give to each other
A balanced and happy marriage is not a dream, it is a reality for me. I wish that more people could enjoy relationships that were satisfying and long-lasting at the same time. Do you have anything to add to this list? I am looking forward to your feedback.
Keep it balanced!
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20 Key Ideas For a Happy Marriage
1. Keep your mind on your main goal, which is to have a happy marriage. Say and do what will enable you and your spouse to have a happy marriage. Avoid the opposite. Everything else is commentary.
2. Keep asking yourselves, What can we do to have a happy, loving atmosphere in our home?
3. Focus on giving, rather than taking. Say and do as many things as possible to meet your spouses needs.
4. Keep doing and saying things that will give your spouse a sense of importance.
5. Frequently ask yourself, What positive things can I say and do to put my (husband or wife) in a positive emotional state?
6. Before speaking, clarify the outcome you want. The meaning of your communication is the response you actually get. If the first thing you say is not achieving your goal, change your approach. Remember that mutual respect and happiness is your real goal. Do not needlessly argue. Silence is often the wisest choice. Constantly be mutually respectful.
7. Show appreciation and gratitude in as many ways as possible. Say something appreciative a few times a day.
8. Be a good listener. Understand your spouse from his or her point of view.
9. Be considerate of the feelings and needs of your spouse. Think of ways that you have lacked consideration and be resolved to increase your level of consideration.
10. Instead of blaming and complaining think of positive ways to motivate your spouse. If your first strategies are not effective, think of creative ways.
11. Give up unrealistic expectations. Do not expect your spouse to be perfect and do not make comparisons.
12. Do not cause pain with words. If your spouse speaks to you in ways that cause you pain, choose outcome wording, Lets speak to each other in ways that are mutually respectful.
13. Be willing to compromise. Be willing to do something you would rather not do in return for similar behavior from your spouse.
14. Write a list of ways that you have benefited from being married to your spouse. Keep adding to the list and reread it frequently.
15. Write a list of your spouses positive patterns and qualities. Keep adding to the list and read it frequently.
16. Keep thinking about what you can do to bring out the best qualities of your spouse. Reinforce those qualities with words and action.
17. Focus on finding solutions to any problems that arise. Be solution oriented. Do not just blame and complain. Do not focus on who is more wrong. For a happy marriage, work together to find mutually acceptable solutions.
18. Remember your finest moments. What did you say and do when you felt best about each other? Increase them.
19. Look for positive activities you can do together.
20. Live in the present. What went wrong in the past is the past. You create the present and future with your thoughts, words, and actions right now. Choose them wisely.
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99 ways to Keep Your Heart Pumping
“We can no longer ignore heart disease. While awareness is important, it’s time to take action now – to love and protect our hearts while maintaining healthier lifestyles. I encourage you to take simple, everyday steps to protect your hearts.”

Heart disease kills more people than any other disease. According to the American Heart Association, almost 33 million American men have cardiovascular disease, and over 430,000 die from it every year. Sadly, many of these deaths were preventable.
The key is to act now – don’t wait until your first heart attack to start making changes in your lifestyle. And making sure the beats go on is not quite as hard as you might think.
So here are some tips, tricks, and techniques that will protect you from the number-one killer. Make them part of your life, and you may just live long enough to see the United States pay its national debt, the Cubs win the World Series, and Madonna retire.
FOLLOW A HEART HEALTHY DIET
1. Rise and dine. In a study of 3,900 people, Harvard researchers found that men who ate breakfast every day were 44 percent less likely to be overweight and 41 percent less likely to develop insulin resistance, both risk factors for heart disease.
2. Refill the bowl. A study in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition reports that two servings of whole-grain cereal (Cheerios count) a day can reduce a man’s risk of dying of heart disease by nearly 20 percent.
3. Choose dark chocolate. Cocoa contains flavonoids that thin the blood and keep it from clotting (like it does just before you clutch your chest and expire). And at least a third of the fat in chocolate is oleic acid, which is the same healthy, monounsaturated fat found in olive oil. Dove dark chocolate bars retain as many flavonoids as possible.
4. Go fishing for tuna. Omega-3 fats in tuna help strengthen heart muscle, lower blood pressure, and prevent clotting – as well as reduce levels of potentially deadly inflammation in the body. Plus, tuna’s high in protein. Research shows that consuming more protein may lower a man’s risk of heart disease by nearly 26 percent.
5. Add ground flaxseed to your food. It’s a natural source of omega-3s, for those who don’t like fish.
6. Grill a steak. You may think it’s bad for your heart, but you’d be wrong. Beef contains immunity-boosting selenium as well as homocysteine-lowering B vitamins. And up to 50 percent of the fat is the heart-healthy monounsaturated variety.
7. Fight cholesterol with fat. A group of 17 Australian men with high cholesterol swapped macadamia nuts for 15 percent of the calories in their diets, and their total cholesterol dropped by between 3 and 5 percent, while their HDL (good) cholesterol rose by nearly 8 percent. The reason: Macadamias are the best natural source of monounsaturated fat.
8. Eat grapefruit. One a day can reduce arterial narrowing by 46 percent, lower your bad-cholesterol level by more than 10 percent, and help drop your blood pressure by more than 5 points.
9. They really are good for your heart. Beans are a great source of homocysteine-lowering folate and cholesterol-lowering soluble fiber. Tulane University researchers found that people who ate four or more servings a week had a 22 percent lower risk of developing heart disease (and 75 percent fewer camping companions) than less-than-once-a-week bean eaters.
10. Order garlic bread. In addition to lowering cholesterol and helping to fight off infection, eating garlic may help limit damage to your heart after a heart attack or heart surgery. Researchers in India found that animals who were fed garlic regularly had more heart-protecting antioxidants in their blood than animals who weren’t.
11. Top your toast. Black currant jelly is a good source of quercetin – an antioxidant that Finnish researchers believe may improve heart health by preventing the buildup of the free radicals that can damage arterial walls and allow plaque to penetrate.
12. Order take-out. Lots of Chinese and Indian foods contain ginger or turmeric – spices packed with natural anti-inflammatories. “Anything that helps keep levels of inflammation low is good for your heart,” says Andrew Weil, M.D., author of Eating Well for Optimum Health.
13. Drink cranberry juice. University of Scranton scientists found that volunteers who drank three 8-ounce glasses a day for a month increased their HDL-cholesterol levels by 10 percent, enough to cut heart-disease risk by almost 40 percent. Buy 100 percent juice that’s at least 27 percent cranberry.
14. Swap sugar for honey. Researchers at the University of Illinois found that honey has powerful antioxidant qualities that help combat cardiovascular disease, while sugar consumption can lower your levels of HDL cholesterol, potentially increasing your risk of heart-related disorders.
15. Don’t let your tank hit empty. A study in the British Medical Journal found that people who eat six or more small meals a day have 5 percent lower cholesterol levels than those who eat one or two large meals. That’s enough to shrink your risk of heart disease by 10 to 20 percent.
16. Fortify with folic acid. A study published in the British Medical Journal found that people who consume the recommended amount each day have a 16 percent lower risk of heart disease than those whose diets are lacking in this B vitamin. Good sources of folic acid: asparagus, broccoli, and fortified cereal.
17. Decaffeinate. Drinks that contain caffeine increase blood pressure by nearly 4 points, on top of speeding up your heart rate by an average of 2 beats per minute. It’s enough to push a borderline heart problem into the danger zone.
18. Scramble an egg. They’re relatively low in saturated fat, and they’re packed with betaine, a compound that helps lower homocysteine levels in the blood by as much as 75 percent. Eggs are one of the few good food sources of betaine.
19. Order a chef’s salad. Leafy greens and egg yolks are both good sources of lutein, a phytochemical that carries heart-disease-fighting antioxidants to your cells and tissues.
20. Eat oatmeal cookies. In a University of Connecticut study, men with high cholesterol who ate oat-bran cookies daily for 8 weeks dropped their levels of LDL cholesterol by more than 20 percent.
21. Pick French wine over German. According to research in the Journal of the American College of Cardiology, French red wine has up to four times more artery-protecting enzymes than German reds.
22. Trade the salt for Mrs. Dash. A 20-year study in the Journal of the American Medical Association found that overweight men with the highest sodium intakes were 61 percent more likely to die of heart disease than those with lower intakes.
23. Have the red licorice. A compound in licorice root has been shown to spike blood pressure – especially in men who eat a lot of black licorice. Fruit-flavored licorice, however, doesn’t contain the compound.
24. Take the Concord. University of California researchers found that compounds in Concord grapes help slow the formation of artery-clogging LDL cholesterol. The grapes also lower blood pressure by an average of 6 points if you drink just 12 ounces of their juice a day.
25. You don’t want fries with that. In a study published in the New England Journal of Medicine, the exercise and nutritional habits of 80,000 women were recorded for 14 years. The researchers found that the most important correlate of heart disease was the women’s dietary intake of foods containing trans fatty acids, mutated forms of fat that lower HDL and increase LDL (bad) cholesterol. Some of the worst offenders are french fries.
26. Snack on pumpkin seeds. One ounce of seeds contains more than a third of your recommended intake of magnesium. According to Mildred Seeling, M.D., author of The Magnesium Factor, magnesium deficiencies have been linked to most risk factors for heart disease, including high blood pressure, elevated cholesterol levels, and the increased buildup of plaque in the arteries.
27. Feast on potassium. Slice a banana on your cereal, then bake a sweet potato or cook up some spinach for dinner. All are loaded with potassium. Studies show that not getting your daily 3,500 milligrams of potassium can set you up for high blood pressure. Other good sources of potassium include raisins, tomatoes, and papayas.
28. Beat the heat with a handful of cold grapes. University of Connecticut researchers recently discovered that fresh grapes provide cholesterol-lowering, artery-clearing protection similar to that you get from drinking concentrated grape juice or wine.
29. Pick the can. The Journal of Agricultural and Food Chemistry found that many canned vegetables contain up to 40 percent higher levels of heart-disease-fighting antioxidants than fresh vegetables do.
30. Toss your salad with olive oil. Men whose diets include as much as 2 ounces of olive oil a day have an 82 percent lower risk of having a fatal first heart attack than men who consume little or none. Olive oil is rich in monounsaturated fats – known to hinder the oxidation of LDL cholesterol into its artery-clogging form.
31. Switch your spread. Buy trans fat-free margarine, such as Smart Balance Buttery Spread. Researchers in Norway found that, compared with butter, no-trans margarine lowered LDL cholesterol by 11 percent.
32. Change your oil. Researchers in India found that men who replaced the corn and vegetable oils in their kitchens with sesame-seed oil lowered their blood pressure by more than 30 points in just 60 days, without making any other changes in their diets.
33. Double the tomato sauce. The lycopene in tomatoes prevents the harmful buildup of cholesterol on artery walls. So double up the sauce on your pizza and pasta.
34. Have a Mac(intosh) attack. Men who frequently eat apples have a 20 percent lower risk of developing heart disease than men who eat apples less often.
35. Use the rotisserie. Foods cooked at high temperatures produce blood compounds called advanced glycation end products, which researchers at Mount Sinai Hospital say reduce cell elasticity and increase heartdisease risk. Three fixes: Steam your vegetables, add marinade to your meat before grilling to keep it moist, and cook foods longer at lower temperatures.
36. Eat fresh berries. Strawberries, raspberries, and blueberries are all loaded with salicylic acid – the same heart-disease fighter found in aspirin.
37. Snack on nuts. Harvard researchers found that men who replaced 127 calories of carbohydrates – that’s about 14 Baked Lays potato chips – with 1 ounce of nuts decreased their risk of heart disease by 30 percent.
38. Slice your risk. Sure, whole-wheat bread contains cholesterol-lowering fiber, but it’s also packed with nutrients that will help keep your blood free of other deadly debris.
39. Have a fiber appetizer. Take a fiber supplement – Metamucil, for instance – 15 minutes before each meal. It’ll help slow the digestion of highly processed starches and sweets. Diets high in foods that quickly raise your blood sugar may increase heart-disease risk.
40. Be a part-time vegetarian. Researchers in Toronto found that men who added a couple of servings of vegetarian fare such as whole grains, nuts, beans, and tofu to their diets each day for a month lowered their LDL cholesterol by nearly 30 percent.
EXERCISE REGULARLY
41. Run indoors on hazy days. Researchers in Finland found that exercising outside on hot, hazy days when air pollution is at its worst can cut the supply of oxygen in the blood, making it more likely to clot.
42. Take up rowing. A study in the European Journal of Applied Physiology found that, compared with running, rowing uses more muscle and causes your heart to pump more blood through the body, resulting in greater overall gains in cardiovascular fitness.
43. Climb. Yale researchers found that men with insulin resistance – a risk factor for diabetes and heart disease – who exercised on a stairclimber for 45 minutes 4 days a week improved their sensitivity to insulin by 43 percent in 6 weeks.
44. Play hard. Any regular vigorous physical activity reduces your risk of cardiovascular disease, even if performed for only 5 to 10 minutes at a time, says John Yarnell, Ph.D., of Queen’s University of Belfast, who authored a study on the subject.
45. Push yourself. Harvard researchers found that men who perceived themselves to be working out vigorously were 28 percent less likely to develop heart disease than guys who felt they were slacking. An intense run should be at 75 to 85 percent of your maximum heart rate. (Calculate your MHR by subtracting your age from 220.)
46. Dive in the pool. U.K. researchers found that men who burn just 50 calories a day in strenuous activities like swimming and hiking are 62 percent less likely to die of heart disease than men who burn nearly seven times as many calories – 340 per day – during less active pursuits like walking and golfing.
47. Do more crunches. A study of 8,000 Canadians found that individuals who could do the most situps in 1 minute were also the least likely to die over a period of 13 years. The reason? Strong abs equal more muscle and less belly fat, and the less abdominal fat you have, the lower your risk of heart disease becomes.
48. Trim your BMI. Even if you work out and are reasonably fit, researchers at Boston University found that having a body-mass index over 25 can increase your risk of heart disease by as much as 26 percent.
49. Bike away the blues. Men who are suffering from depression are more than twice as likely to develop heart disease as guys who aren’t depressed. So c’mon, get happy. In a trial of 150 men and women, Duke researchers found that after just 3 months of treatment, antidepressants and exercise were equally effective at relieving almost all symptoms of depression.
50. Take the stairs. People who walked an extra 4,000 to 5,000 steps each day lowered their blood pressure by an average of 11 points, according to a small study at the University of Tennessee.
51. Build an iron heart. Harvard researchers found that lifting weights 30 minutes a week is enough to reduce your risk of heart disease by 23 percent.
52. Fartlek! “Losing as little as 5 to 10 percent of your body weight will reduce your visceral-fat stores by 25 to 40 percent,” says Jean-Pierre Despres, a professor of human nutrition at Laval University in Quebec City. A study in Medicine and Science in Sports and Exercise found that doing fartlek – alternating speeds throughout your run – helps you lose weight faster than moving at a steady pace.
LEAD A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE
53. Watch a scary movie. Anything that causes your heart to race – slasher flicks, a good book, even being in love – also makes your heart stronger, according to researchers at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center. Upsetting the rhythm once in a while is like hitting your heart’s reset button, which helps it keep on ticking.
54. Join a group. Any group. According to research from the University of Chicago, lonely people have a harder time dealing with stress and are at greater risk of heart disease than people with a wide circle of friends.
55. Tell your wife to butt out. Or you may leave her – in a hearse. Researchers in Greece found that individuals who were exposed to cigarette smoke for just 30 minutes three times a week had a 26 percent greater risk of developing heart disease than people who rarely encountered secondhand smoke.
56. Check for carbon monoxide. Almost all large household appliances, including furnaces, water heaters, washers, dryers, and fireplaces, can leak carbon monoxide into your home. Large levels of the gas can kill you in hours, but long-term exposure to tiny amounts can be just as lethal, promoting the formation of blood clots and increasing the risk of heart disease. So make sure vents are clear and appliances are properly ventilated, and install a carbon monoxide detector near your bedroom.
57. Wash your hands. German researchers followed 570 people for an average of 3 years and found that those with the most antibodies (from fighting off infections) in their systems also had the most significant clogging in the arteries of their hearts, necks, and legs. Use liquid soap. Germs can live on bars.
58. Ditch the fad diet. University of Michigan researchers found that people whose weight fluctuated wildly – as it tends to do when you adopt the whack-job-diet-of-the-month – had weaker hearts and worse bloodflow than people who lost weight more slowly but kept it off for good.
59. Pee in the bushes. After studying 40 people with heart disease, researchers at Taiwan University in China found that the stress of having a full bladder increases heart rate by an average of 9 beats per minute and constricts the flow of blood by 19 percent. Either could be enough to trigger a heart attack, says study author Tsai Chang-Her, M.D.
60. Root for the (grrrrr) Yankees. A study on World Cup Soccer found heart-attack rates fell among locals when the home team won. Experts believe that the euphoria of a win, plus stress reduction from leisure pursuits, may help keep heart problems at bay.
61. Meditate 20 minutes a day. According to Thomas Jefferson University researchers, this daily downtime may reduce your anxiety and depression by more than 25 percent. And that’s important, since a University of Florida study found that patients with coronary artery disease who had the most mental stress were three times more likely to die during the period of the study than those with the least stress.
62. Smile. Researchers at Harvard kept tabs on 1,300 healthy men for 10 years. At the end of the study, they found that individuals with the most positive attitudes at the start of the trial were half as likely to have experienced heart problems as men with more negative attitudes.
63. Take Monday off. The reduction in stress from missing a few days of work shrinks heart-attack and stroke risk by nearly 30 percent, according to a new study conducted at the State University of New York.
64. Cheaters never prosper. Casual extramarital sex increases your risk of a fatal heart attack. Doctors at London’s St. Thomas’s Hospital found that 75 percent of cases of sudden death during sex involved a two-timing spouse – and the death risk was greatest in men who took up with much younger women. The docs found hardly any risk of heart attack in long-term relationships.
65. Buy a punching bag. A Harvard study found that men who express their anger have half the risk of heart disease compared with men who internalize it.
66. Knock off before Nightline. A 10-year study of 70,000 women found that those who get 5 or fewer hours of sleep on a regular basis have a nearly 40 percent greater risk of heart disease than those who sleep a full 8 hours. One possible reason: Research shows that people who are exhausted have higher levels of fibrinogen, a blood-clotting protein that can drastically reduce bloodflow to the heart and brain.
67. Touch her. Ten minutes of skin-to-skin contact (hand-holding, hugs) with your mate can help keep your blood pressure and pulse from spiking during stressful times, according to University of North Carolina researchers.
68. Get pricked. Acupuncture appears to trigger the endorphins that help the heart relax and fight off stress, researchers say.
69. Bundle up. In a study of half a million people, doctors at Lille University in France found that cold spells that decrease the temperature by more than 18F from one day to the next can increase heart-attack risk by as much as 13 percent.
70. Move to the sticks. Or sleep with earplugs. German researchers found that people who endured nighttime sound levels that averaged higher than 55 decibels – about the volume of a washing machine or a coffee percolator – were twice as likely to be treated for high blood pressure as those who slept with sound levels under 50 decibels.
71. Drink more tea. An American Heart Association study found that men who drank 2 cups of tea a day were 25 percent less likely to die of heart disease than guys who rarely touched the stuff. The reason: flavonoids in the tea, which not only improve blood vessels’ ability to relax, but also thin the blood, reducing clotting.
72. Be a sponge. Loma Linda University researchers found that drinking five or more 8-ounce glasses of water a day could help lower your risk of heart disease by up to 60 percent – exactly the same drop you get from stopping smoking, lowering your LDL (bad) cholesterol numbers, exercising, or losing a little weight.
73. Close the car windows. Harvard researchers monitored the strength of 40 middle-aged men’s hearts and then tracked the men’s exposure to airborne pollution. “The more particles the men inhaled, the harder it was for their hearts to adjust to different types of activity,” says David C. Christiani, M.D., the study author.
74. Stop at 2 cups. Dutch researchers found that people who drank roughly 4 cups of coffee a day had 11 percent higher levels of heart-damaging homocysteine in their blood than non-coffee drinkers.
75. Stop snoring. Half of all people with sleep apnea – a condition that occurs when people quit breathing for up to a minute at a time while sleeping – also have high blood pressure, caused by unusually high levels of the hormone aldosterone. Beat the apnea and the BP drops, too. Your doctor can prescribe a SleepStrip, an at-home sleep-apnea test.
76. Pair up. Married men are less likely to die of heart disease than bachelors. Toronto-based researchers studied 100 men and women with mild high blood pressure and found that after 3 years of marriage, the happily married men had healthier hearts than their unmarried brothers. Just choose your bride wisely, or your heart will be broken and sick.
77. Have more sex. You might think all that grunting and sweating would increase your risk of a stroke, but University of Bristol researchers say the opposite is actually true. Not only are men who have sex at least twice a week less likely to have a stroke than men who have sex less often, but all that steamy exercise may also help reduce their heart-disease risk by up to a third, compared with guys who aren’t getting any.
78. Make friends at work. Researchers at St. Johns University studied 70 New York City traffic cops and found that men with the most work friends also had the lowest heart rates and healthiest blood-pressure levels, even during times of stress.
79. Read a good book. Swiss researchers found that men who recited poetry for half an hour a day lowered their heart rates significantly, reducing their stress levels and possibly their heart-disease risk. You don’t need to go all Emily Dickinson; just try reading aloud to your wife or kids instead. Or to yourself. (But not on the subway.)
80. Pull it. By the age of 20, up to 65 percent of men have at least one misaligned wisdom tooth that will never come in properly. Leave the tooth alone and bacteria can collect around it in a pocket, increasing your risk of all kinds of infections, including periodontal disease – which has been linked to heart disease.
81. Finish your degree. California researchers found that women with 4-year or advanced degrees have a lower risk of heart disease than those who are less educated. The benefit comes from moving up the earnings ladder.
82. Tune out stress. Blood pressure surges in the morning. But listening to music instead of Howard Stern can help control it, reducing your chances of a morning coronary.
83. Buy a dog. All that love (“You’re a good boy, yes you are!”) and aggravation (“Bad dog! No eat Daddy’s crab dip!”) makes your heart more adaptable and better able to deal with the stress that can lead to heart disease.
84. Have a drink every other day. A Boston study of 38,000 men found that men who drink alcohol three or four times a week have a 32 percent lower risk of heart attack than men who drink less than once a week. Moderate amounts of alcohol raise HDL cholesterol levels and keep the blood thin, reducing the threat of artery-clogging clots. Drinking more frequently is fine (up to the limit at which your friends – or the state police – gather and confront you), but won’t provide additional heart protection, the study’s authors report.
85. Rub. Massage helps relieve stress and reduce levels of inflammation-triggering chemicals in the skin, says Maria Hernandez-Reif, Ph.D., of the Touch Research Institute at the University of Miami.
86. Rinse, brush. Rinse your mouth and brush with toothpaste. They’ll reduce oral bacteria, which can decrease your risk of a heart attack by 200 to 300 percent, according to University of Buffalo researchers.
KNOW YOUR BLOOD INDICATORS
87. Measure BP after exercise. Ask your doctor to measure your blood pressure after a cardiac stress test. “The numbers will be higher, but studies show they’ll also be a better indicator of your overall health,” says Kerry Stewart, M.D., of Johns Hopkins University.
88. Know what’s in your arteries. Results of a highly sensitive C-reactive protein blood test, together with your cholesterol numbers, can help give doctors a more accurate picture of your heart-disease risk. And an apo B measurement may be a more reliable indicator of heart disease than LDL cholesterol, according to a recent review of studies comparing the two.
89. Use the free blood-pressure test (wisely). Most of the free blood-pressure-monitoring machines found in pharmacies aren’t 100 percent accurate. According to a Canadian study, the machines can be off by an average of 8 points systolic and 4 points diastolic per reading. Check your BP three times, then average the readings.
90. Get your BP under 120/80. If your blood pressure is high (more than 140/90), knocking 20 points off the top number (systolic BP, the pressure when your heart is contracting) and 10 points off the bottom number (diastolic BP, the pressure when your heart is between beats) can cut your risk of dying of heart disease in half.
INCLUDE HEALTHY HEART SUPPLEMENTS
91. Take chromium. According to new research from Harvard, men with low levels of chromium in their systems are significantly more likely to develop heart problems. You need between 200 and 400 micrograms of chromium per day – more than you’re likely to get from your regular diet. “Look for a supplement labeled chromium picolinate – it’s the most easily absorbed by the body,” says Gary Evans, Ph.D., a chromium expert.
92. Go fish. The American Heart Association recommends eating fish at least twice a week. If that’s not on your meal plan, try a fish-oil supplement instead. Besides lowering blood pressure and clearing plaque from the arteries, 1 to 2 grams of fish oil a day improves bloodflow and helps maintain a regular heartbeat.
93. Buy calcium-fortified OJ. Increasing the calcium in your diet can lower your blood pressure. You’ll derive a benefit from the vitamin C as well. According to research from England, people with the most vitamin C in their bloodstreams are 40 percent less likely to die of heart disease.
94. Get your daily B vitamins. A study at the Cleveland Clinic found that men with diets low in B vitamins were more than twice as likely to develop heart disease as men with higher levels in their systems.
95. Take aspirin. Researchers at the University of North Carolina found that regular aspirin consumption cut the risk of coronary heart disease by 28 percent in people who had never had a heart attack or stroke, but were at heightened risk. For maximum impact on your blood pressure, take a low dose just before bed.
96. Don’t double dip. Heart patients who took ibuprofen along with their aspirin had a nearly 75 percent higher risk of premature death than those taking only aspirin, according to a study, conducted in Scotland, of more than 7,000 participants.
97. Schedule a flu shot. A New England Journal of Medicine study found that people who’d been vaccinated against the flu were also 19 percent less likely to be hospitalized for heart disease than people who hadn’t gotten the shot.
98. Add E to aspirin. Researchers at the University of Pennsylvania found that a combination of the antioxidant (shoot for 800 international units) and blood-thinner helped reduce levels of plaque in clogged arteries by more than 80 percent.
99. Swallow phytosterols or phytostanols. Both substances – derived from pine trees and soy – lower bad cholesterol levels by an average of 10 to 15 percent. Besides being available in supplements, the compounds are in cholesterol-lowering spreads like Benecol and Take Control.
Remember: Your heart will benefit more from a few long-term health improvements than from a flurry of activity followed by a return to the dangerous norm.
Right now you have the tools to protect yourself. Work 10 tips into your lineup over the next month. When they become second nature, adopt 10 more. By year’s end, the percentages should swing around in your favor.
You can do this. It’s the only way to give your heart a beating chance.
Myths and Facts About Back Pain!!!











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10 Things Your Teenager Won’t Tell You
Wonder what’s bugging your teen? It’s hard to be certain when all your son does is grunt and your daughter won’t stop rolling her eyes. So rather than pressing our own kids to talk—not going to happen!—we asked teenagers from around the country what messages they wish they could share with their moms and dads. Sure, every child is different, but it may do you and your teen some good if you took these truthful kids’ concerns to heart.
1. She needs privacy.
“I hate that my parents don’t give me any personal space,” says Eleanor, 14. “And I hate that they don’t think I need it.” Even if your children share a room, give each child an area that’s off-limits to everyone else in the family (including you), such as a desk or a spare closet. To show that you respect your teen’s privacy, don’t rummage through her personal space unless you have a concrete reason to believe that she’s lying to you or hiding something serious. And remember: “All kids today are doing drugs” isn’t a concrete reason.
2. Sometimes he just needs you to listen.
“I want to tell my mom and dad everything,” says Keegan, 13, “but I don’t want to listen to them nag.” Understand that sometimes your kids just want a sounding board—they’re not looking for you to solve all their problems. When your son complains that his science teacher is being unfair or his soccer coach has been extra-hard on him, encourage him to talk by asking open-ended questions. (“Well, how does that make you feel?”) Don’t jump in with advice or threaten to intervene.
3. She may be dating—even if you’ve explicitly said she can’t.
“I didn’t tell my parents about a guy I dated for a year, because they didn’t allow me to have boyfriends,” says Marla, 15. “They knew we hung out, but I’d say, ‘Oh, we’re just friends.’” Try to be relaxed when it comes to dating—even if it’s killing you. Instead of forcing your daughter to sneak around, let her start with group dates, where at least four other kids are with her and her date at all times.
4. He may not be getting great grades on every assignment.
“I don’t tell my parents when I get a bad grade because I don’t want to listen to them tell me how I’ve let them down,” says Sam, 16, who says he occasionally fails a quiz but usually makes up for it with better exam scores. “There are nights I just don’t feel like studying!” Sometimes one bad grade is just that: one bad grade. If your son feels like he can vent to you about bombing a quiz or a book report, you won’t have to wait until the end of a semester to find out he’s struggling in school.
5. She doesn’t want to talk to you about sex.
“My mom knows I’ve kissed a boy,” says Sonia, 15, “but I don’t want to tell her anything else. It’s my life, not hers.” The good news is, in a 2005 government survey, less than half of high school students (47 percent) said they’d had sex. Still, it’s safest to assume your teen is in that 47 percent and educate her about birth control or preventing STDs. Don’t press her for personal details, but do offer advice; use third-person examples if it helps.
6. He hates when you don’t hold his siblings accountable.
“I hate that my parents don’t care how my youngest brother acts,” says Henry, 13. “When he swears or picks a fight with me or my older brother, they say, ‘He’s 7. He doesn’t know any better.’ But when I was his age I would have been in big trouble for swearing.” While it’s natural to become more lax as you have more children, it’s important to consider each unique situation, not just your children’s ages. Remember, all of your kids will respect you more if they think you’re a fair and reasonable parent.
7. She wishes you’d cut her some slack.
“It makes me sad when my mom screams at me when I’m already down,” says Erin, 17. Even if your daughter seems to screw up every time you turn around, it’s important that she doesn’t feel like you’re constantly coming down on her. When you’re upset, take some deep breaths; a few minutes might give you perspective (is it really worth it to lose your cool over dirty laundry?) and a chance to evaluate your daughter’s mood. Perhaps she’s ignored the laundry because she’s stressed about school or antsy about a boy who hasn’t called her back.
8. He lies to stay out of trouble.
“Sometimes I don’t come home because I’m too drunk to drive,” says Aaron, 19. “If I told my parents that, they’d flip out, so I lie.” While it would be irresponsible to give underage drinking the green light, you don’t want your child to be in an unsafe situation because he’s rushing to be home on time. If your son calls just before curfew and says he needs a ride, save your questions (and lectures) for the morning.
9. She gets frustrated when you use her age to your advantage.
“I can’t stand it when my parents say, ‘You’re 17. Act like a grownup,’ one day, and then turn around and say, ‘You’re not old enough to do that. You’re only 17,’ the next,” says Izzy. “Which is it? Make up your mind!” Since “age-appropriate” is subjective, try to give your child hard-and-fast rules that aren’t dependent on a number. (“Every member of this family attends church on Sunday,” or “Visiting friends at college isn’t allowed until you’re in college yourself.”)
10. He wishes you would trust him.
“My parents don’t trust that I don’t do drugs,” says Steven, 15. “And I really hate that they believe what other people tell them instead of what I tell them.” Constantly accusing your kids of this or that—especially if your accusations are unfounded—breeds mistrust. Eventually they’ll do something dishonest just because they’re sick of being wrongly accused. Trust your kids until they give you a real reason not to.
Related articles
- Parenting advice by teens, Radical Parenting. Ask yours to be “Teacher for the Day.” (howtobeawalkingmomtra.wordpress.com)
- Busting the myth of the teenaged monster (jamespatrick1.wordpress.com)
- Tips for Talking With Your Daughter (teens.webmd.com)
- Helping Your Teen to Stay Healthy (brighthub.com)
10 Marriage Rules You Should Break
The two of you should do everything together; work out every disagreement (without actuallyfighting); spend every night in the same bed; and never, ever be bored. Say what?! These and other so-called “rules” for marriage need some serious debunking. And it’s not just because rules your mother may have passed on are outdated; some may be downright damaging. In fact, “breaking some marriage ‘rules’ may be the best thing you can do for your relationship,” says Barbara Bartlein, RN, MSW, psychotherapist and author of Why Did I Marry You Anyway? Here are 10 rules you can break with confidence.

1. Never go to bed angry.
Where did this one come from? Turns out, it may go as far back as the Bible, which advises not letting the sun go down on your anger. But trying to work through a problem when you’re tired and stressed won’t get you anywhere, says Elizabeth Lombardo, PhD,psychologist
and author of A Happy You: Your Ultimate Prescription for Happiness. “Agree to disagree for now, and to revisit the issue when you’re rested.”

2. Always be 100% honest.
In marriage, no-holds-barred honesty is not always the best policy. For example, “you don’t need to share details of past relationships,” says Bartlein. “That invites comparisons, and when you compare, someone comes up short.” The bottom line: You need to be polite and caring when it comes to your partner’s feelings.

3. Never vacation without each other.
The received wisdom here is that if you have time off from your jobs and lives, you should naturally prefer to spend it together. One problem with this rule is that you and your spouse may not have the same definition of a great getaway (you like to ski, he’s a beach bum). The other danger, says Dr. Lombardo, is the belief “that you have to be each other’s everything, and that’s just not realistic.” Sometimes, you need a spa weekend, and he may want to go camping (or vice versa). Just be sure that you don’t alwaystake off without each other.

4. If you fight, you’re headed for divorce.
Actually, says Bartlein, research shows that couples who neverfight—assuming that means they’re holding back to avoid conflict—are more likely to split. You need to find ways to fight healthily and productively (without blaming, name-calling and the like), but that said, being committed to respectfully airing out conflicts is a far better rule than “keep your mouth shut.”

5. Once you have children, they come first.
“So often, I see couples who have put their relationship on hold in order to be good parents,” says Dr. Lombardo. But those couples, she says, have it exactly backward. Making your relationship top priority is better not just for you, but for your children, who need to see you in charge and who feel safer and more secure with parents who have a loving relationship. “Create couple-only time during which you do not discuss bills or children, where you do fun activities and enjoy each other’s company.” The kids’ll be all right.

6. You should never sleep in separate beds.
Um, snore much? It’s a myth that couples always sleep better and more cozily together than apart. One partner may be a toss-and-turner, or one may hit the hay early while the other keeps a reading light burning till the wee hours. So if one of you occasionally decamps to the guest room, don’t sweat it. “Getting a good night’s sleep is crucial to the health of your mind, body andmarriage,” says Dr. Lombardo. Just be sure a separate-bed habit isn’t about avoiding sex or physical intimacy.

7. Partners should sync up their hobbies.
Though spending every free moment you have training for a marathon while your spouse works on his classic car isn’t good for your marriage, neither is subscribing to the notion you should quit doing what you love just because your husband doesn’t love the same things. Giving up your passions is akin to forgoing your independence, and “without independence in a marriage people feel trapped,” says Bartlein. Pursue your separate interests andfind activities you both enjoy.

8. If there’s no spark, you’re doomed.
Many married couples understand intellectually that they won’t always experience that I’ve-been-drugged-by-love feeling in a long-term relationship. “But many still believe that when the spark dies out, it means they’re in the wrong relationship, and seek something new,” says Bartlein. Long-term relationships survive on commitment and trust, out of which grows love. The mistake here is to believe that you can live forever on fireworks, or even just love, alone.

9. Boring is bad.
The problem with this so-called rule, says Bartlein, is when couples confuse a calm, predictable union with a bad one. A drama-filled relationship may feel exciting, but in the long run it’s not likely to be healthy. Isn’t it better, she says, to “boringly” know where your spouse is every night than to be “excited” by constant ups and downs? “Better to have a safe, relaxed, ‘boring’ life together in the everyday. You can always inject excitement with vacations and activities.”

10. You should have sex with your partner to make him/her happy.
This may be a particular problem for women, especially new mothers. “Sex becomes yet another item on your to-do list, and you think you have to do it for the sake of your marriage, and the happiness of your spouse,” says Dr. Lombardo. While neither of those reasons is wrong, they shouldn’t be the only reasons. “Sex is for both of you.”
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Benefits of Walking…!!
Walking is widely recommended for its health benefits. According to a recent U.S. Surgeon General report on physical activity and health in America, more than half of the U.S. population does not participate regularly in any type of exercise. That physical inactivity can lead to poor health.
The Surgeon General urged Americans to “get in shape,” encouraging everyone to get at least one-half hour of moderately vigorous activity (such as brisk walking) each day. The latest recommendations suggest that you should try to walk two miles at a brisk pace of three to four miles per hour nearly every day.
It is increasingly obvious that one of the best ways to maintain good health is through physical activity. Regular participation in exercise has been shown to be helpful in the prevention of such killers as heart disease, cancer, anddiabetes. Exercise also helps to control weight. (According to the latest research, one out of three Americans is obese.)
And because exercise helps to strengthen muscles and bones, it can even decrease your risk of developing diseases such as osteoporosis and arthritis.
Some of the most interesting and overwhelming evidence supporting the need to be physically active is from the research being conducted at the Cooper Institute for Aerobics Research in Dallas, Texas. Dr. Kenneth Cooper, known as the “father of aerobics,” founded the Cooper Clinic in the early 1970s to investigate the effects of physical activity and fitness on health and longevity and to help people develop healthy lifestyles.
In July 1996, research from the Cooper Institute showed that participating in moderate to high levels of physical activity reduced the risk of dying from any given cause. This held true regardless of other risk factors. In other words, even if an individual suffers from high blood pressure or obesity, the chances of dying are lessened by maintaining at least a moderate level of fitness. This is remarkably good news, especially for individuals who have hereditary risk factors such as a family history of heart disease.
In 2007, Circulation, the journal of the American Heart Association, published an updated report on physical activity and public health. In order to make a recommendation on the amount of exercise necessary to benefit America’s health, an expert panel of scientists, including physicians, epidemiologists, exercise scientists, and public-health specialists reviewed research on physical activity and the impact of exercise on health.
Their conclusion was the same as the plea issued by the Surgeon General: “Every U.S. adult should accumulate 30 minutes or more of moderate-intensity physical activity on most, or preferably all, days of the week.” The researchers determined that intermittent as well as sustained activity can be beneficial. In other words, on days when you can’t fit in a 30-minute walk, you can still garner fitness benefits by taking two or more shorter walks squeezed in throughout the day.
This may seem somewhat confusing to those of you who are well acquainted with previous recommendations to exercise for a sustained period of 20 to 60 minutes. The Surgeon General’s report is not meant to overshadow or replace these previously recommended exercise guidelines.
Exercising for a sustained period of time is still the best way we know to make improvements in your cardiorespiratory fitness. But for many, exercising for long periods of time can be intimidating. And most of us experience days when unforeseen events throw off our schedules and prevent us from having a solid block of time for exercise.
Significant health benefits can be realized by simply ceasing to sit and starting to move. The risk of developing heart disease, high blood pressure, non-insulin-dependent diabetes, and colon and breast cancers can be reduced just by becoming more physically active.
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12 Critical Things You Should Never Tolerate
There is so much in life that we just tolerate. Some of it we have to deal with (taxes, bad weather, traffic). But there’s a good portion of stuff that we tolerate even when we don’t have to. We step around things, overlook irritations, and mindlessly accept energy drains. Perhaps we’ve become so immune to these tolerations that we don’t recognize the negative impact they have on us.
Sometimes just recognizing the things we are tolerating in life gives us a renewed sense of hope and energy. If you don’t know what’s pulling you down, it feels impossible to make your life better. Even small changes and shifts with these life tolerations can result in dramatic improvement in your outlook and mood.
However, when you address some of your bigger tolerations, you can completely change the course of your life and open doors to a world of happiness and inner peace that you didn’t know existed.
Think about the poorest of the poor, living in squalor and despair without the hope of a better future. When they are lucky enough to see the connection between education and life success, they have found a portal to escape poverty and misery. It’s a huge shift.
In the same way, we must search for these portals that will allow us to move to the next level of powerful living. Our tolerations are the brambles and vines growing over the portal doorway. We must clear them away to be able to open the door and walk through.
Do you want to walk through the portal to a happier life? If so, here are 12 situations that you should never tolerate if you want to live joyfully. See if you recognize yourself in any of these tolerations. If so, now is the time to clear them away.
1. Unhappiness at work.
You spend nearly half of your life at your job. If you are unhappy, do you really want to give away that much of your life? Think of the impact it has on your emotional well-being, your health, and your relationships. Think of the opportunities missed for doing something that you love, that is fulfilling. Don’t settle for living this way forever. Find a job that you love. Get more education if necessary. At the least, make changes within your current job to lessen your unhappiness.
2. A Long Commute.
A long commute to work by car or public transportation is stressful and empty. Hours in a vehicle adds up to days, months, years wasted in traveling when you could be doing and living. Find a job closer to home, or move closer to your job. Whatever your reason is for this commute, is it really worth the lost time?
3. An Unhealthy Lifestyle.
Are you overweight? Do you smoke? Are you sedentary? Do you eat junk? Do you abuse alcohol or other substances? An unhealthy lifestyle leads to an unhappy life. If you feel bad and look bad, you can’t enjoy life. This is your one and only life, and your body is your sacred garment. Take care of it now.
4. Draining Relationships.
If there are people in your life who are abusive, demeaning, angry, hurtful, not supportive, unethical, or crazy, it is time to let them go. You may have your reasons for hanging on, but do these reasons really outweigh the negative impact they have on your life? At the very least, find ways to cut back on interactions with these people.
5. A Disordered Living Space.
How you live is a reflection of who you are. You don’t need to live in a mansion with lots of stuff, but your living space should reflect the joy, order, and peace you want in your life. It should be clean, orderly, and have some expressions of beauty and warmth. It should feel welcoming to you and to guests in your home.
6. Negativity.
It is around us all the time, invading our minds like termites. We hear and see negative ideas and images on the news. Our friends and associates share their negative stories or reactions to life events. We hear negative lyrics in songs or watch violence and abuse in movies or on TV. Before we know it, we feel negative and depressed about our lives. Turn it off. Walk away. Stop listening. Instead watch, read, and listen to uplifting and positive ideas and information.
7. Too Much Stuff.
Over the years, we accumulate. We like to buy things. We like to have things. But these things require our time, energy, money, and effort. They lose their shine and we lose our interest. They become a burden — something we have to dust rather than enjoy. Get rid of this stuff and free up time and energy in your life.
8. Financial Problems.
The stress and emotional pain caused by financial problems steals your joy and peace in life. Whatever you are doing now or did in the past to cause the problem, do something about it now. Yes, some financial difficulties are unavoidable, but do whatever you can to lessen the stress, even if it means delivering pizzas for a while. If you are over-spending, stop. Sell some things. Very few “things” are worth the stress of money worries.
9. Living Out of Your Integrity.
Are you living in alignment with your values? Are you being true to yourself? Do you need to apologize for something or ask for forgiveness? When you are living outside of your integrity, it causes a disruption in your soul and your psyche. It drains your energy, fosters guilt, and saps your self-esteem. Get right with yourself and with others.
10. Living Without Fun.
If you life is all duty and work (even if the work is enjoyable), you are living out-of-balance.Fun and relaxation are necessary ingredients for a full and joyful life. By removing some of the other stresses from your life, you can make room for pleasurable activities, travel, and entertainment. The world is your beautiful oyster meant to be enjoyed.
11. Accepting Ignorance and Inertia.
We use both of these as excuses not to do something. We talk ourselves into our own inability to accomplish or change because we are afraid. We are afraid it will be hard, we are afraid we might fail, we are afraid it won’t work. You and everyone else knows these are just excuses to avoid. Don’t accept them anymore. Stretch yourself.
12. Lack of Communication.
In every single relationship you have, especially your primary relationship, healthy communication is essential to your life happiness. We you aren’t communicating properly with someone, you feel anxious, angry, frustrated, and helpless. Open, honest, loving communication is the number one ingredient for successful relationships. If you don’t know how to communicate in a healthy way, then learn how to and begin to implement these skills.
Use the next few minutes to think about one area in your life you are just tolerating. How does this toleration impact your sense of well-being and joy? What is one action you could take today to begin to eliminate this toleration? Even a small change can make a huge shift for the better in your life.
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How To Improve Marriage And Slow Down Life At The Same Time
Everywhere you look, things are moving at a fast pace. Hurry up is a common phrase. When I want something, I want it right now. “What? You mean I have to wait 45 seconds for the book I just bought to download? Where’d I put the number for my Internet provider, I need a faster connection!”
The speed of life takes its toll on marriage and family as well. If your day is spent racing around from one thing to the next, it’s too easy to continue this pace when you arrive home each day.
If you feel like life is too fast, if there is no more room on the schedule for another thing to do, if the chaos of the world around you has caused you to create a life determined by others rather than yourself, and if you are desperately seeking a way to slow things down in order to breathe – then here’s a few suggestions to try.
- Take a walk. Make it a point each day to walk with your spouse and your kids. Spring is here in Texas so the weather gets better each day. Go outside and sit and observe the world around you. Walk and talk with your spouse.
- Walk or ride a bike to places you need to go. Some stores may be too far to walk, but not all. I love the times when my wife and kids and I walk or ride up to the grocery store or a restaurant for dinner. Sure it takes longer to get there, that’s the point. Enjoy the journey there together.
- Make it a point to eat outside often. There’s something about being in nature that allows you to slow down. Go to the park for a picnic, eat out in the backyard, or on the patio. Get outside.
- Find a moment alone each morning. Before you jump into the day, take some time to simply sit quietly. The longer the better. Enjoy a cup of coffee or tea. Breathe in and out, relax, meditate, pray. What better way to start each day?
- Don’t check email first thing in the morning. I struggle with this one the most. It’s such a routine to fire up the laptop first thing in the morning and check to see what’s going on with the blog, emails, etc. This allows too many other things to invade my life too soon in the day. Try waiting until 9 or 10 each morning to check email. That way the first part of the day can be spent on whatever is most important.
- Turn off all phones. At some point each evening, turn off your phones, or at the very least don’t answer them for a while and spend that time with your spouse and family. Play games, read together, talk.
- Color with crayons. This one is great if you have little ones around. There’s something magical about the feeling of coloring with crayons. Let yourself go and color. Don’t simply help your child with their coloring, color for yourself.
- Go on a media fast. We’ve been on a news fast for almost a year. Absolutely love it! Most everything reported today is negative, so why get caught up in it each evening? Don’t worry, with Google and Yahoo, you’ll still know the major things happening in the world.
I’m sure there’s more, add your ideas in the comments.
50 Questions That Will Free Your Mind

These questions have no right or wrong answers.
Because sometimes asking the right questions is the answer.
- How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?
- Which is worse, failing or never trying?
- If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?
- When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?
- What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world?
- If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?
- Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?
- If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?
- To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?
- Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?
- You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do?
- If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?
- Would you break the law to save a loved one?
- Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity?
- What’s something you know you do differently than most people?
- How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy?
- What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What’s holding you back?
- Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?
- If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?
- Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster?
- Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?
- Why are you, you?
- Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend?
- Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you?
- What are you most grateful for?
- Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones?
- Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first?
- Has your greatest fear ever come true?
- Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?
- What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special?
- At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?
- If not now, then when?
- If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?
- Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?
- Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?
- Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil?
- If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?
- Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?
- Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before?
- When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?
- If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today?
- Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous?
- What is the difference between being alive and truly living?
- When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right?
- If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?
- What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?
- When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing?
- What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?
- In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that?
- Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?
Please share your thoughts with us in the comments section below.
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13 Mistakes Men Make Each Morning
There are some people who manage to slip effortlessly from slumber into the arms of a new day, firing on all cylinders from the start. If the headline of this article piqued your interest, it is likely that you are not one of these people. In fact, if you are still reading, it is entirely possible that you are sitting at your work desk with a death-grip on a cup of coffee, half an unshaved face and breath to match the cargo hold of The Deadliest Catch.
As always, we’re here to help. Here are 13 mistakes men make every morning, and how to correct them.
1. Wake Up On The Wrong Side Of The Bed
The first mistake commonly made at the day’s beginning is starting off on the wrong foot. After an unappetizing dream, poor sleep or a stressful set of days, the mindset with which we greet the morning is absolutely essential to mental well-being. Famed author of 30 best-selling books, motivational speaker and PHD, Dr. Wayne Dyer has assembled a series of morning meditations addressing the importance of this exact moment. Starting with a prolonged “Ah” sound, Dyer says the following words to himself: “I know that I can connect my mind with the divine mind and guarantee myself peace in any moment.” We know. It’s a little, shall we say, California. Come up with your own. By speaking a morning mantra, you increase your chances of having a positive day.
2. Dehydration
Next step should be reaching for water. Do your best to drink an entire glass before addressing another task. The effect of water on your metabolism in the morning is important. It wakes up your digestive system before dehydrating it with coffee.
3. Bathroom Breakdown
Create a morning routine in the bathroom of rinsing your face with lukewarm water and a drop of soap. Even if you’re not inclined to utilize an expensive face wash, your skin craves water.
4. No Breakfast
For some of us, eating breakfast regularly can be a challenge. While our bodies might not feel hungry, skipping the first meal of the day is a detriment for those interested in maintaining a healthy metabolism. It does not need to be a hefty helping of eggs and sausage. In fact, eating a small piece of fruit, yogurt, small bowl of oatmeal or egg-white omelette is better for your body than bombarding it with heavy fats and carbohydrates generally found in typical American breakfasts. And for those of us on the run there are always easy-to-grab yogurts and bananas.
5. Lack Of Vitamins
Try a dose of Vitamin C for energy. After a few weeks of consistently reminding yourself to power up in the morning, your body will chart an apparent difference in energy abundance.
6. Caffeine Overload
While the first few hours of the day seem to challenge our eyelids’ ability to remain open, over-fueling on caffeine is one of the worst and most common mistakes made by working individuals. By artificially stimulating the senses at such a fast and intense rate, it communicates to our bodies a dependency on the substance that you won’t be able to shake for the rest of the day. Moreover, caffeine highs always result in devastating lows, causing you to crawl back to the coffee pot and repeat the cycle all over again.
7. Screen Addiction
Though we are accustomed to checking our phones when we wake up, setting our eyes against a screen first thing in the morning molds our brain’s agility for the rest of the day. Instead, look out the window, focus your eyes on the sky outside, or go outside for a minute and inhale the coming day. This way, when you are ready to reach for your smartphone, your prior personal peace will steel you for the day.
8. No Exercise
Getting physical activity in the morning is one of the most beneficial ways to begin a day. Not only does it activate your metabolism and motivate your body to digest food throughout the day, it also focuses you mentally. By overcoming the mental obstacle of forcing yourself into physical challenge, you prove to yourself your ability to conquer tasks your brain fears. More than that, the endorphins provide better positivity than any caffeine can manage.
9. You Smell
Whether or not you support the wearing of cologne, deodorant is an important pit stop (pun intended). Nothing’s worse than rushing to work, throwing yourself at your office desk and glancing down only to see a sweat ring releasing terrible fumes for onlookers in the surrounding area to suffer from. To be careful, it’s best to keep a stick tucked away in your desk drawer or glove compartment.
10. Foul Teeth
Though it sounds terribly elementary to tell an adult about the importance of teeth brushing, a recent survey revealed that the total days on average an American spends brushing their teeth is 38.5. Moreover, 50 percent of people confessed that a smile is the first noticed facial feature, which should motivate you to keep yours from yellowing.
11. Stiffness
Stretching every morning can increase your overall flexibility. Simply stand up straight, inhale your arms up, bend over at the waist and gently reach for your toes. Though it might feel straining, do your best to breathe into the stretch rather than against it. You should feel a slight pull in your hamstrings, which can also be found by doing this stretch on the ground, legs stretched out long before you, while bending forward at the waist. To loosen hip and groin tightness, sit with the soles of your feet together and gently push your knees toward the ground.
12. No Vision
Try a mental habit known as “visualization.” This entails calming your senses and stepping into an emotional reality of your projected desires, whether it’s snagging that promotion or climbing Yosemite. This act of experiencing, in all five senses, your ultimate goal, guides your body, mind and heart toward achieving this dream. Or so says the crunchy-granola crowd. Close your eyes, visualize your intended place, feel the surroundings, smell the air there and memorize this feeling in your body. As a result, you are subconsciously connected with your greater life goal and driving force.
13. No Plan
Again, we know this is hippie-dippy, but at least give it a try. Writing a brief journal entry in the morning is known to increase likelihood of daily organization and focus. Write out a simple note of all that you’re going to accomplish by day’s end, chronologically organized by importance. Instead of thinking of this as a to-do list, consider it a done deal. By writing it out, it is going to happen. You don’t need to obsessively check off tasks accomplished, but rather calmly look the list over at sundown and see how well you did. If there’s a few points left, don’t register a feeling of disappointment in yourself. Capitalize on all that you did accomplish and transfer the remaining items to tomorrow’s early morning entry.
Making a Difference
37 Ways to Make a Difference to Yourself and Others
“Making a difference” is not just a scheduled event or activity, but a moment any time when a person finds it in his/her heart to do something good, to care or to share, or to make a voluntary contribution to another individual, a community, or our society.
When we consciously give or do whatever we can to help maintain the wellness of individuals and families in our communities, these acts also contribute to the best quality of life of everyone in our society.
Let us continue to gather more bright ideas for our own lives and our surroundings.
Let’s now begin to count the ways and put them into action.
The TIME has come… We say ‘No more to gloom and doom!’
It is time to rise to our true potential… to experience total wellness in every area of our lives, contributing to solutions to maintain the quality of life we enjoy in our communities.
It is time for each of us to care more, to shine, and to carry the light of HOPE everywhere!
No one individual or one group, not even our government, can do it alone!
This is the time that we need each other most, to work together, joining our hands together in making a difference.
For YOURSELF:
1. Smile more often! Be amazed of how many will be happy to smile back at you. Besides, this is the best facial exercise you can make to delay aging signs — so smile!
2. Eat right! Boost your immune system by eating more natural food, like fresh fruits and vegetables. This alone can significantly reduce your weight and health concerns.
3. Exercise regularly. The reason is not just to lose weight, but it’s a great habit to maintain good health by improved circulation, elimination of body toxins, etc.
4. Drink water more than ‘colored drinks’ for your health. Water has no sugar or additives.
5. Read and learn more. Devote time and money for self-improvement, the best investment you can make that truly pays off.
6. Love, care, give, and share more. This practice is the very purpose of your life.
7. Keep believing. Pray. Nurture your spirit. This won’t cost you any, but help or answer to your needs can be just a prayer away.
For those YOU CARE ABOUT:
8. If you love them, then say it and show it! Do not take them for granted. They need both to hear and see you care.
9. Spend more quality time with them. It is what they’ll remember most.
10. Visit, write, call those you haven’t for a while.
For our SENIORS:
11. Give a helping hand and cheers — cooking, cleaning, or whatever they are limited to.
12. Give a ride or offer to carpool with them whenever there’s a need.
13. Involve them on activities that will continue to stimulate their senses, or they can contribute their gathered wisdom.
For our CHILDREN or YOUTH:
14. Walk or create programs for youth to benefit them and rally for their good future.
15. Give them more opportunities to explore and develop their natural gifts and talents, express their dreams and goals.
16. Encourage our children more by your words and example. Stay positive! .
For our VETERANS: (For the freedom we now enjoy is due to their sacrifices.)
17. Send cards or anything to show you remember and appreciate them.
18. Recognize them and give a smile, a salute, or high-five when you see them around.
19. Support their events and fundraising efforts to help them.
For our HOMELESS Citizens: (Just like you and me, they need care and understanding. )
20. Encourage them by taking time to help them get the help they need/resources to get back on track.
21. Volunteer in your local shelters. There are many ways you can help or contribute.
22. Help create more programs to help them get out of their situation.
For our VOLUNTEERS: (For helping us make things happen.)
23. Big “thank you!” note or anything to show your appreciation of them.
24. Join them and be prepared to do a random act of kindness anytime.
25. How about “volunteers appreciation day” to celebrate them and have a good break?
For our ENVIRONMENT: (We only have one planet, so we must take care of it.)
26. Clean and plant trees with your workmates, neighbors, etc. anywhere permissible.
27. Recycle consciously, not just plastics and papers, but clothes and others you can share. Clean up your closet, garage, or storage for everything that you don’t need. Do a yard sale or simply drive to or call local charities for pickup. This is one recycling to meet needs of others.
28. Learn more of what’s causing the global warming and contribute to preventions/ solutions.
For ALL of US:
29. Sing, dance, be happy no matter what. Brighter days are yet to come!
30. Speak the truth. Seeking the truth can set someone free.
31. Notice and say something good or positive to someone, and mean it.
32. Learn survival techniques. Always be prepared for any emergency.
33. Accept yourself. You are gifted and blessed more than you know.
34. Be forgiving and understanding as you seek forgiveness and understanding.
35. Learn how to budget or how to manage your money. Spend only on needs and the money that you actually have.
36. Be involved in your community in making good things happen!
37. Will you support me on my personal goal to make a difference (i.e., to reach at least three million people everywhere to bring HOPE and more OPPORTUNITIES for people to live better lives)?
5 Keys to Enhanced Sleep
Insomnia - a condition that causes problems both with falling asleep and staying asleep – affects millions of people.
Since sleep medical professionals point to sleep as a primary contributing factor to many common diseases, it’s obvious that it’s not just important but crucial to sleep well.
Fortunately, those same sleep medical professionals have also discovered the conditions that determine our quality of sleep.
Simple lifestyle changes can have you sleeping like a baby in no time.
Here are five tips to explore before you even think about asking your doctor for a sleeping aid or buying one over the counter.
1. Invest in a quality mattress. Getting a enjoyable night’s rest may be as easy as getting a new sleeping surface. Many people report that memory foam mattresses allowed them to completely relax and sleep deeply for the first time in their lives. Indulge in the very best bed linens you can afford, too. Sheets with at least a 300 thread count are smooth and luxurious, and your blankets and comforters should also give you a feeling of being pampered. Some mattress retailers offer free sheets or comforters when you buy a new mattress, but these are characteristically of a cheaper quality as they are a free add-on for buying the mattress. When it comes to bedding, the best things in life are not free.
2. Put your body on a schedule. Going to bed at the same time every night and getting up at the same time every morning (yup, weekends too) puts your body on a regimented resting pattern. After a while, it will “expect” to sleeping at a set time, and you might not even need an alarm clock to get up for work. (You’ll find that your day starts out much better when you wake naturally rather than being jarred awake by an alarm.)
3. Create a relaxed sleeping environment. Your bedroom should be quiet and dark. Even the smallest amount bit of sound or luminosity-such as the ticking of a clock or a light left on outside-can interfere with your sleep, even though the person sleeping may not be aware of it. Do what you have to: A sleep mask androom darkening blinds will screen out the brightness; earplugs and “white noise” like a rotating fan can help with interfering noises. The best temperature for sleeping is 68-72 degrees Fahrenheit. Most bodies begin to overheat over 75 degrees, and any temperature below 60 degrees is too cold for the body to relax.
4. Calm down. Stress is a real sleep killer. Look for ways to distress prior to going to sleep. Do a bit of light reading, meditate, try various mellow stretches, or enjoy an herbal bath.
5. Protect your sleep from the great caffine caper. Caffeine stays in your system longer than you might realize-up to 8 hours. For better sleep, you should prohibit caffeine intake at least six hours before you go to sleep. Remember that pop drinks, most teas, and chocolate all contain enough caffine to interfere with your sleep.
Many of people who have followed these suggestions greatly enhanced their sleep quality and therefore their quality of life.
Give them a month’s trial and you too will reap the rewards of a peaceful night’s sleep.
Hit the Snooze Button To Live Longer
Brunch at 10?
Make it 11.
As if not having circles under your eyes wasn’t a compelling enough reason to get enough sleep, here’s another biggie: You’ll be less likely to age from diabetes, the makes-you-sick- and-tired disease that affects more than 24 million Americans and 2 million Canadians.
While more than 80 million of us in North America have the genes for type 2 diabetes, very few of us have to express them, if we do the right things.
When researchers let people sleep just 5.5 hours a night for two weeks, they saw that the sleep-deprived folks had started to develop diabetes; they had increasedinsulin resistance and reduced glucose tolerance.
What does that mean?
Basically, your body has mailmen that take energy from food and place it inside the mailbox in your cells.
But with diabetes or insulin resistance, those mailmen can’t get the mail inside.
So glucose, like a posse of bored teenagers, hangs out in your bloodstream and causes all kinds of trouble.
That’s dangerous to your arteries, your brain, your immune system and your kidneys.
Previous research saw the risk for developing diabetes go up with far less sleep, but these scientists decided to test a more realistic scenario of just 5.5 hours (sound familiar?).
Too busy to get to bed earlier?
No, you’re not; especially since your life depends on it!
Try inching up your bedtime by 10 little minutes a night.
By this time next week, you may have dropped your risk of aging from diabetes.






42. Take up rowing. A study in the European Journal of Applied Physiology found that, compared with running, rowing uses more muscle and causes your heart to pump more blood through the body, resulting in greater overall gains in cardiovascular fitness.
54. Join a group. Any group. According to research from the University of Chicago, lonely people have a harder time dealing with stress and are at greater risk of heart disease than people with a wide circle of friends.
88. Know what’s in your arteries. Results of a highly sensitive C-reactive protein blood test, together with your cholesterol numbers, can help give doctors a more accurate picture of your heart-disease risk. And an apo B measurement may be a more reliable indicator of heart disease than LDL cholesterol, according to a recent review of studies comparing the two.
92. Go fish. The American Heart Association recommends eating fish at least twice a week. If that’s not on your meal plan, try a fish-oil supplement instead. Besides lowering blood pressure and clearing plaque from the arteries, 1 to 2 grams of fish oil a day improves bloodflow and helps maintain a regular heartbeat.














